F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

Welcome to F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum. This is a free service provided for parents of those suffering from eating disorders. It is moderated by kind, experienced, parent caregivers trained to guide you in how to use the forum and how to find resources to help you support your family member. This forum is for parents of patients with all eating disorder diagnoses, all ages, around the world.

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wheresmywand Show full post »
Thanks Torie, [smile]
Thank you everyone, I have started the process. Thank you for the boot I needed , have to go now will update tonight x thank you Sotired I would like to pm at some stage when I get time, I agree that hospital will just help break that strong hold of anorexic sanctioned foods that is all she'll eat, then I can get re started again at home with full nutrition - only worried, will she learn new bad tricks in there from others?
17 yr old daughter dx RAN Jan 16, but starting restricting some months before that. Let go too early and now back home gaining weight again, slowly challenging fear foods and entrenched 'healthy, pure' eating habits and behaviours.
So glad to hear you may finally get an admission to starship very soon!  I can honestly say without the three (short) stays we had there last year we would not be where we are today.  My d was a stubborn one to and FBT was just not a go for her either.  Make the most of the very short stays they give you to push through some of the anorexic tricks.  It does feel quite awful watching them get upset when they have to eat so regularly and so much but it is so much easier for the hospital to do this than it is for you when its your own child and you don't like to see them upset.  I thought my d had learnt some habits from the other girls but she was already well versed in every trick there was.  It turned out she had done a lot of research in the months leading up and was already aware of it all.  They don't seem to get all that close to each other, but it is a chance for the parents to meet other parents and that has been an amazing support for me.  Let us know if there is anything we can do for you while your d is in starship!
D now 15yrs and well above target weight. Crossing everything we are now on the road to a full recovery.
Excellent work, so glad we could help [smile]. Will make sure I check the pm's later.my d is in CFU til Monday so if you want to do a coffee at muffin break there just message here.the support I have had through my meet ups with other parents-two of whom I meet up for coffee with every couple of months-has been invaluable.
Atdt is great but swapping war stories and helping each other in person has helped me a lot.(that's a no pressure offer by the by cause I know that it can add to the burden).
Re the tricks-if she has access to the Internet then she has already learned them.a lot of parents stay with their kids at starship which lessens the time they have to swap notes.so she might learn something new but chances are you will just see the behaviour she was hiding from you.when you do just buckle up, stay strong and cry later in the parents lounge.(it's surprising how often that place is empty).
You can do this,
Mine didn't learn tricks from hosp - I think she saw them but worked out pretty quickly that she wanted to get better and out of there. I think seeing how hard the illness is in others helped her decide to get better. The most progress she made towards wr was during and after starship stays. Back home the illness gradually took over control again, no matter what we did.
Normal doctors and dieticians don't seem to 'get' eating disorders.
I'm assuming your school is in Hamilton, but if it's in Auckland there's a good dietitian called Garalynne who works with Kellie Lavender. But Reds or Starship defs first port of call if poss. I'm sure there are good people in Hamilton too - I just don't know who they are.
19yo D, AN since Sept 2014. Was wt restored for a year or two but now starving again, refusing treatment or to admit she has a problem. BMI guesstimate around 13 or 14. Has left home.
Very sad Mum.