F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

Welcome to F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum. This is a free service provided for parents of those suffering from eating disorders. It is moderated by kind, experienced, parent caregivers trained to guide you in how to use the forum and how to find resources to help you support your family member. This forum is for parents of patients with all eating disorder diagnoses, all ages, around the world.

Join these conversations already in progress:
• Road To Recovery - Stories of Hope
• Events for Parents and Caregivers Around the World
• Free F.E.A.S.T Conference Videos

Visit the F.E.A.S.T website for information and support.

If you need help using the forum please reach out to one of the moderators (listed below), or email us at bronwen@feast-ed.org.

Need to talk with another parent? F.E.A.S.T. parents offer peer support via:

ed_newbie
Hi Everyone,

I haven't posted in a while so thought I'd share an update.

D is almost 6 months post-AN diagnosis and about 4 months weight restored. She started a low dose (10mg) of Fluoxetine mid-May to help with OCD thoughts/behaviors particularly related to exercise compulsion immediately after meals and other obsessive ED thinking.

After a tough couple of weeks the second half of May I noticed a real turning point in early June. Her resistance levels came way down at meal times, particularly at breakfast. Today was the first day she actually came to the table and said "I'm hungry!" at breakfast time. Those who recall my early posts will remember how I referred to breakfast as The Meal of Great Resistance - so this is a huge win for her!

Her compulsion to exercise after each meal dissipated and stopped entirely about a week ago.  Although she still feels a bit anxious after meals, she is able to calm down more easily and needs less post-meal support.

Lunches away from home have gotten easier.  She is not eating intuitively yet but I am hearing her say more often "what's for dinner'?  She still waits for me to plate her dinner but will eat pretty much what she is given, and has started to eat other meals with friends and isn't as nervous as she was even just a few weeks ago.  A couple of weeks ago she ate her first DONUT in over 8 months!!

There's lots more I could share related to socialization, budding confidence, and some great guidance we received in a few of her counseling sessions that I think have helped move things along, but in a nutshell she is doing great and appears to be at a healthy weight for her based on her mental state.  

For all of you caregivers struggling to move your loved ones into recovery, please don't give up hope.  I too muddled through the despair and frustration during those first few hellish months and kept going and refused to back down and now I can see that our efforts are paying off.  Recovery is possible!  

"Lineage, personality and environment may shape you, but they do not define your full potential."    Mollie Marti  

ed_newbie

15 yr old d diagnosed with AN late December 2015 at the age of 12 after a 23 lb weight loss during prior 3 months. Started FBT/Maudsley at home on Christmas Eve with support from amazing local nutritionist specializing in ED and trained in FBT. WR Feb 2016 and pushing our way through puberty and rapid growth.
Quote
HateEDwithApassion
What a wonderful update. Love those! Thank you for sharing!

19 yo D. AN - since about 15 years old. WR quickly - but the last four years have been tough. Since Sept. 2017, two residential stays, now in IOP, fighting a relapse. ED is hanging on, mental state not great, can't get her to remain at a weight long enough or high enough to see mental healing. She's on a gap year that will likely now turn into two.
Quote
Torie
Wow - So great to hear about all this progress! Kudos to you and your d! xx

-Torie
"We are angels of hope, of healing, and of light. Darkness flees from us." -YP 
Quote
bks76
Yeah! Great news, thanks for sharing! While I know the days were long, what great progress! I love the normal "little" things, like donuts, coming back. Because really they are not little at all.
Quote
momupnorth
thank you for this update.  we are a few months behind you (just turned 13 year old d diagnosed anorexic April of this year and in hospital ever since).  it is wonderful to hear this message of hope.  I am so very glad that your d is doing so well!

momupnorth
Mom Up North
Quote
mnmomUSA
Hip Hip Hooray for DONUTS!!!  I love reading these updates!  Awesome news.  Keep up the good work!

D, age 18, first diagnosed March 20, 2013, RAN, at age 13 Hospitalized 3 weeks for medical stability. FBT at home since.  UCSD Multi-family Intensive June 2015. We've arrived on the other side.  :-)  D at college and doing great!
Quote
momtobeauty
Fantastic update. Thanks for sharing. You are just about one or two months ahead of us in terms of diagnosis, treatment and weight restoration. We are also doing well (at least on the ED front) and it seems we were both helped by early and competent treatment. Wishing your d continued healing and continued strength to you both. Great job.
Quote
K63
Hi ed-newbie, well done for getting to this stage it gives us all hope . Thanks for posting .
Daughter started restricting in February 2014, tried re feeding at home hospital admission 4 1/2 months weight restored started restricting post discharge, back on meal plan full supervision weight restored april 2016. Starting to hand back responsibility for meals it's scary. 
Quote
happiness
Wow, that is incredible. You just have done an amazing job referring her so quickly! Well done! Fantastic work. How did you do this? When and why do you think her turning point was? Is she still taking the Fluoxetine? 
My d is almost w/r but her thoughts and her thinking has not improved at all yet and we are just about to decide wether we should try medication to help her. i don't know! 

it is so reassuring hearing those stories, but on the other hand i wonder if I am doing something wrong?

Keep on doing what you are doing and your life will be normal again very, very soon!
Quote
OneToughMomma
A very hearty congratulations to the Newbie family!  What a wonderful accomplishment. You should be so proud of yourselves.

xoOTM

PS to happiness You sound like you are doing a great job, too. 2 months to refeed is incredible, so just like everywhere else in life, don't compare your d to others. It can be a slow, torturous process--at least it was for us!  The ED thinking often gets worse right before things turn around, so just keep going.
D in and out of EDNOS since age 8. dx RAN 2013. WR Aug '14. Graduated FBT June 2015 at 18 yrs old. [thumb]
Quote
ed_newbie
Happiness - I agree with OTM that comparing progress isn't helpful because every child is unique. What I did with my d could have completely backfired with a different child.

What I can say is that I truly believe that food is medicine and that patience and compassion are critical ingredients in treatment. I also believe that persistent insistence on full nutrition daily with a focus on FATS has helped to speed brain healing - this opinion is based only on observations. The number one fear of someone suffering from AN is FAT and yet FAT is exactly what the brain needs most to heal. I believe adequate fats has helped my d manage the urge to binge - again this is based only on my observations.

Therapy has had some impact on my d 's recovery, but overall I think I gained more insight from d`s therapy than she has!

The best advice I can give to others is to be brave and flexible and don't hesitate to change course when you sense that progress has stopped or something doesn't seem right. Use this forum as a sounding board, take care of your own needs to help ward off burnout, and never ever give up hope.

"Lineage, personality and environment may shape you, but they do not define your full potential."    Mollie Marti  

ed_newbie

15 yr old d diagnosed with AN late December 2015 at the age of 12 after a 23 lb weight loss during prior 3 months. Started FBT/Maudsley at home on Christmas Eve with support from amazing local nutritionist specializing in ED and trained in FBT. WR Feb 2016 and pushing our way through puberty and rapid growth.
Quote
ed_newbie
Sorry I forgot to mention that yes, she still takes the 10mg Fluoxetine daily. Apparently this is a commonly prescribed dosage used to treat OCD symptoms in adolescents. Results were quick for my d - she showed improvement at about 2 weeks in.

"Lineage, personality and environment may shape you, but they do not define your full potential."    Mollie Marti  

ed_newbie

15 yr old d diagnosed with AN late December 2015 at the age of 12 after a 23 lb weight loss during prior 3 months. Started FBT/Maudsley at home on Christmas Eve with support from amazing local nutritionist specializing in ED and trained in FBT. WR Feb 2016 and pushing our way through puberty and rapid growth.
Quote
Morgana
Oh wow, such am amazing update! Thank you for sharing with us.
15yr old d. June 2014 stomach pain. Medical investigations until Feb 2015, referred to CAMHs dx food anxiety. Kept restricting and losing weight until July 2015, medically unstable. Began intensive re-feeding at home. Re-evaluated by psychiatrist, dx Autism Spectrum Disorder and Atypical AN.
Found out it's actually Typical AN.
IP from Oct 15, ng tube Nov. Re-started eating food July 2016. Discharged from IP August 2016 97% weight for height.
Quote

        

WTadmin