F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

Welcome to F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum. This is a free service provided for parents of those suffering from eating disorders. It is moderated by kind, experienced, parent caregivers trained to guide you in how to use the forum and how to find resources to help you support your family member. This forum is for parents of patients with all eating disorder diagnoses, all ages, around the world.

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blondie
Hi all

Thought I would share the link to this article that I was reading in the newspaper that might be of interest to some of you - interestingly is seems like the author also had an ED herself
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-7070769/Anorexia-sufferer-51-denied-crucial-treatment-NHS.html

Sadly this is something we've experienced with my sister....even more reason to try and get the ED under control in the early stages before it really takes hold ….(easier said than done I know!)
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Mamaroo
Very interesting article. Sad that ED isn't tackled so voraciously such as cancer. My mum, who is in her 70s, was diagnosed with cancer, scans and biopsies followed quickly and she was given medication within weeks. Nothing like like could be expected with ED, sadly.

Interestingly, the article states that focusing on non food/eating goals such as attending lunch with friends, seem to be a great motivator to start to eat normally for adults. I was a very picky eater growing up, until I started dating my hubby. He told me that at his home you eat what is put in front of you and there and then I was able to eat 90% of my 'fear' food. Later when I had children and didn't want them to be fussy eater, did I get rid of the last 10%. 

Thanks Blondie for posting!
D became obsessed with exercise at age 9 and started eating 'healthy' at age 9.5. Restricting couple of months later. IP for 2 weeks at age 10. Slowly refed for months on Ensures alone, followed by swap over with food at a snails pace. WR after a year at age 11 in March 2017. View my recipes on my YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCKLW6A6sDO3ZDq8npNm8_ww
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melstevUK
It is really tragic that older sufferers are not getting and have never got the help they need and deserve.

We can only hope that, with newer interventions such as FBT and better understanding of the importance of nutrition and the neurobiology of eating disorders, that there will be less older sufferers in the future.  That day will be a long time coming, though.  Sadly.
Believe you can and you're halfway there.
Theodore Roosevelt.
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NELLY_UK
So my Ds ED started age 11/12. Now she is 20 almost 21 considered an older sufferer. 
She got here because when younger, under CAMHS  the ‘treatment’ was not offered. IP was given when the BN was already severe- two years in. After 8 monthis ish she was discharged because her BMI got to some arbitrary number. 
When she relapsed, immediately, they did nothing. The rules about consent and the sectioning rules were looser at age 15. They waited keen to discharge at 18. Left her with little support as the threshold approached. 
What a ludicrous system. She is still on the same meds, no one ever reviews them, no one reviews her case, she sees no one as a rule- it’s all voluntary. No one tells her to get her bloods checked or an ecg. She is on the higher rate of disability payments due to the intensive care that she requires in the evenings and at meal times. 
If she sees a GP about anything else, they never take the opportunity to do anything about the BN/MH issues. 
She has been cast aside as a difficult case right from the start almost. 
GRRRR
NELLY D 20 bulimic since age 12, diagnosed in 2011. 20 months useless CAMHs,7 months great IP, home March 14..... more useless CAMHs.now an adult & no MH services are involved. I reached the end of my tether, tied a knot in it and am hanging on. ED/Bulimia treatmentis in the dark ages in West Sussex.
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ValentinaGermania
All we can do is try to fight the bad systems when our kids are better and we have some time and power left.
I thought I can do nothing about it and now it seems to move something here in Germany.
It is a difference wether 10 parents are asking for FBT or 1000....
Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
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kazi67
NELLY_UK
im so sorry to read your d journey 
I would be shouting from the rooftops
i know when we were left on a waiting lists to see govt providers here, and once my d was getting the care she needed, (and she was so ill by then, and yet we were still waiting on govt services)I did send a few emails to GP, dietician and govt dept complaining
probably didn’t make any difference? Who knows? But I felt a bit better after saying how I felt and getting it off my chest 
i mean we all pay our taxes don’t we? Our kids all deserve the treatment they need

I also complained about a carers course (govt run) I went to that offered absolutely no hope of recovery - so are they saying to us to not to expect our kids/YA to get better to accept that? Seriously it’s maddening!
I drove home crying, gutted 
why the heck have a carers course and offer no hope when as we know we can have hope of recovery if we get the help/guidance/support we need

surely the so called professionals have some sort of “Duty of Care” to your d

i can’t understand it I seriously can’t 

I read your other post too and I do hope you get some enjoyment on your trip away Nelly you certainly deserve it
we recently had a trip away (one night and all the dramas followed) but it’s a new normal we have become used to I think 
I find any change of routine/stress triggers my d but we battle on and it was good to get out of the house
I kind of expect the worst and if we get better that’s ok lol
and I actually even can laugh about it too 😐
its laugh or cry right? We may as well laugh 
x
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