F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

Welcome to F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum. This is a free service provided for parents of those suffering from eating disorders. It is moderated by kind, experienced, parent caregivers trained to guide you in how to use the forum and how to find resources to help you support your family member. This forum is for parents of patients with all eating disorder diagnoses, all ages, around the world.

Join these conversations already in progress:
• Road To Recovery - Stories of Hope
• Events for Parents and Caregivers Around the World
• Free F.E.A.S.T Conference Videos

Visit the F.E.A.S.T website for information and support.

If you need help using the forum please reach out to one of the moderators (listed below), or email us at bronwen@feast-ed.org.

Need to talk with another parent? F.E.A.S.T. parents offer peer support via:

ValentinaGermania
My dear ATDT friends,

I want to thank you for all your support in the last 3 years and that you helped me to safe my daughters life. Finding you here changed everything and made recovery possible for us. I will always be grateful for all your ideas, wise words, telling me the truth if needed and advise me what to do and for all the love I received from the wonderful friends I found here. I have never met such wonderful people before.

We now have a special situation here. Our german parents network https://netzwerk-magersuchteltern.de/ is growing every day and we are only a few people that can support a country of 80 million habitants. My time and power is limited and I need to decide who needs help first. Corona crisis on top makes it more difficult as we fear we will see our health system break down in the next weeks.

I hope I will be able to come back in future but I am not sure about that at the moment.

If anyone wants to stay in private contact, feel free to reach out. You can send me a note when you click on my icon.

Please stay healthy and keep feeding your children. It is worth that fight.

❤
Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
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deenl
The very best of luck with your endeavours, Valentina. From what I can see, you have helped to bring real change to the German system which was urgently in need of modernisation. I am sure you will be able to help many German speaking families.

Take care and stop by now and then to let us know how you are. Hope your whole family, especially the parents in law, stay safe.

Warm wishes,

D
2015 12yo son restricting but no body image issues, no fat phobia; lost weight IP! Oct 2015 home, stable but no progress. Medical hosp to kick start recovery Feb 2016. Slowly and cautiously gaining weight at home and seeing signs of our real kid.

May 2017 Hovering around WR. Mood great, mostly. Building up hour by hour at school after 18 months at home. Summer 2017 Happy, first trip away in years, food variety, begin socialising. Sept 2017, back to school FT first time in 2 years. [thumb] 2018 growing so fast hard to keep pace with weight
  • Swedish proverb: Love me when I least deserve it because that's when I need it most.
  • We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence Recovery, then, is not an act but a habit. Aristotle.
  • If the plan doesn't work, change the plan but never the goal.
  • We cannot control the wind but we can direct the sail.
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MKR
Dear Valentina, we will miss you but completely understand.

Please don't delete your previous posts, because they are still a good source of courage and common sense. 

Wishing you and those around you all the best in this current situation and in the future.

Lots of love,
Mum's Kitchen

14-y-o "healthy living" led to AN in 2017 and WR at 16. Current muscle dysmorphia.
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melstevUK
ValentinaGermania,

You have been a valued member of the ATDT forum and have offered so much support and advice to so many others.
But we have to focus where we are needed most and I know you will do a great job for your German compatriots who have found themselves in the awful situation with a child with an eating disorder.  

I wish you all the best in this new and necessary venture and continuing good health for your daughter.
Hugs!
Believe you can and you're halfway there.
Theodore Roosevelt.
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joanne34
Thank you so much for the advice you have given me.  Wishing you all the best for you and your family xxxx
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CED123

So sorry to see you go Tina but recognise why.  Thank you so much for all your support - you are often quick with a speedy response in a crisis.  I'll keep in touch!
Currently no light; only tunnel 🙁
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PurpleRain
Tina, I will miss you so much! I wish you the best in all your endeavours, I hope that you can come from time to time, when things are more settle. Thank you so much for your support, your presence was strong and your words welcome. Big hug!
13 yo d started to eat "healthy" September 2018, she had a growth spurt a bit later, followed by tummy bug. She started restricting breakfast and school lunch in January 2019 (that we know). We succesfully refed at home.
I have found inner strenght, patience and compassion that I did not know I had.
Never retreat, never surrender
keep feeding
 
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teecee
Tina I will miss you so so much. You always put your words perfectly....our loss and their gain. Take care in the future and much love to you and your family. 
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Human
I have not known you very long, but when you have responded to my posts. Your words have always been encouraging, honest and direct and to the point! You also have a great sense of humour! I wish you and your family all the best xx
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Ocras68
Tina, I will miss you so much.  Your posts are full of practical advice and I love your direct way of dealing with things, as well as your great sense of humour.  You were the one I always paid attention to, and found myself agreeing with, time and time again.  Here’s to your daughter’s continued health and happiness, and wishing you all the best with the German parents network - they are lucky to have you. I am so grateful that you were on ATDT at the time when I most needed help.  A huge thank you and good luck. ❤️ Xx
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Kali
Tina,
I wish you well and hope that the German parents network will help many families and that your daughter will continue to enjoy good health.
Stay safe. 

warmly,

Kali
Food=Love
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Foodsupport_AUS
@ValentinaGermania we will miss you. We are all getting pulled in difficult directions at this time. Thanks for having been here, and hopefully you can drop in in the future and let us know how things are going. 
D diagnosed restrictive AN June 2010 age 13. Initially weight restored 2012. Relapse and continuously edging towards recovery. Treatment: multiple hospitalisations and individual and family therapy.
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Enn
Wishing you all the best in your future endeavours. 
I am sure you will be successful in all that you do.
When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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Torie
Tina.  Oh my gosh how I will miss you, except that I will write to you offline.  Still, I will miss you here on the forum.  You have been such a wise and strong voice against ED and have helped so many.  I realize of course that helping with the German community has to be a priority because I'm sure you are one of their most able volunteers, and I know that the need must currently be swamping the supply of help.  I hope and trust they will cherish you as much as we do. xx

-Torie
"We are angels of hope, of healing, and of light. Darkness flees from us." -YP 
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NJMom1
All the best to you and your daughter, Tina. This is my 2nd post on the forum, but I wanted to say that I always appreciated and admired reading your posts and the advise you gave. I would always say to myself “let’s see what  Tina thinks about this” because your advise was always spot-on and direct. You said what people (like myself) needed to hear, even if it was tough to hear at the time. Your strength and “no nonsense” viewpoint got me through a lot of dark days. I know that you will be an incredibly valuable resource to the folks in Germany who need you. Be safe and may your knowledge and insight into this complex illness be a ray of light and hope to those you help. 
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evamusby_UK
Love from me, Tina. You are doing much-needed work for German-speakers and you have helped to create some fantastic resources on https://netzwerk-magersuchteltern.de/ (and of course in your thread on this site). People in Germany need this so very much.
Eva Musby, mother, author, produces lots of resources for parents at https://anorexiafamily.com and on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/user/EvaMusby/playlists
[comp]
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