F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

Welcome to F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum. This is a free service provided for parents of those suffering from eating disorders. It is moderated by kind, experienced, parent caregivers trained to guide you in how to use the forum and how to find resources to help you support your family member. This forum is for parents of patients with all eating disorder diagnoses, all ages, around the world.

Join these conversations already in progress:
• Road To Recovery - Stories of Hope
• Events for Parents and Caregivers Around the World
• Free F.E.A.S.T Conference Videos

Visit the F.E.A.S.T website for information and support.

If you need help using the forum please reach out to one of the moderators (listed below), or email us at bronwen@feast-ed.org.

toothfairy
http://www.maudsleyparents.org/images/Dr._Rebecka_Peebles.pdf
Food is the medicine. Recovery is possible.
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LFW
Dr Peebles' presentation is excellent, touches on new perspectives in diagnosis and treatment of ED. My D is almost 21, started her ED at 12, but due to distractions of comorbid behaviors (alcohol, social media, boys) her ED wasn't effectively diagnosed until after weeks of therapy at substance abuse rehab at 18. Several long-term inpatient ED programs and lots of psychiatric and psychotherapy since, she is high-functioning in many ways (academically, professionally), but ED is still in control of her eating behaviors, body image and weight, and she is treatment resistant. We understand now that this underlying ED, layered with comorbid behaviors, tainted her high school experience and then ruined her two attempts at going away to college. It has threatened her life on numerous occasions, numerous blackouts. Now, after living at home and going to local community college for past year, working full-time and receiving accolades there, but no therapies at all, she proposes transferring to a different university away from home. We know her ED is still in control, we watch time march on and see no attempt at treatment, and so we know that this new attempt at independence will likely end in failure or worse, and so we are increasingly reluctant to support the idea. We've asked her to get a complete physical with her gyn or pediatrician, for a current baseline BMI and bloodwork. She is resisting this, too. We are stuck, aware of the prognosis of a treatment-resistent person with longterm ED, but unable to affect much change now, given her age and past experience. Advice from well-meaning loved ones, that we completely withhold financial support or move her out unless she gets treatment has not been realistic for us, as we've been clinging to hope that our D, who has so many God-given talents, could get a handle on this for her own sake, break these malignant, self-abusive habits. It may soon be our last resort, however.
I'd appreciate hearing from other care-givers who've witnessed their D reach an inflection point, where they are sick of the ED and want to treat it, cure it. What did it take, who helped and how did they get there?
Laura Wood
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tina72
"I'd appreciate hearing from other care-givers who've witnessed their D reach an inflection point, where they are sick of the ED and want to treat it, cure it. What did it take, who helped and how did they get there?"
"as we've been clinging to hope that our D, who has so many God-given talents, could get a handle on this for her own sake, break these malignant, self-abusive habits."

This will not happen. I do not know anyone where this happened. They are all highly intelligent or even gifted and cannot see how sick they are. She cannot break these habits therefor she needs someone else to help her break these habits: you.

Without proper food intake and WR they cannot get better. The malnurished brain does not work and they cannot see and understand what they are doing to themselves.
Sorry for no better answer. It does not help to wait for insight. That is lost precious time. All that helps is food, food and food. They only get better when the brain is fully nurished.

My d is nearly 19 now and we only support University with money and other support if she is eating 3 meals 2 snacks and if she is going to see her GP regularly. She knows that we mean business with that and that she needs to come home when she struggles. We will not support ED behaviour or restricting or starvation with one single €. This sounds hard but that is the only voice ED understands and it is working (knocking on wood).

Tina72
Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
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