F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

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sk8r31 Show full post »
Enn
I am going to buy a new pillow for myself today. Have been putting if off for so long. My neck is telling me it is time! Simple but so important. I need to sleep. Such a little pleasure but so necessary!😴

Remember self care, means caring for yourself. Make you day a bit brighter easier, more enjoyable. It does not need to a big thing. Simple pleasures have the power to feed your soul.
🐚
When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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sk8r31
Love the idea of a new pillow which will hopefully lead to better sleep Enn!  Something relatively simple, and yet means you are noticing what you need and putting that to the fore.  I had a haircut yesterday...hadn't had one in months.  Amazing how that put a spring in my step afterward!
It is good to not only hope to be successful, but to expect it and accept it--Maya Angelou
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Enn
Those are great smm74! I may try those!🌸
When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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Torie
For those who like puzzles, maybe a free trial on one of the genealogy sites to create a family tree.  It's like a jigsaw puzzle where all the pieces from many different puzzles are mixed together, some of the correct pieces seem not to fit perfectly, and many pieces seem to be missing.  Oh gosh, that doesn't sound good, does it?  Anyway, I do enjoy it. xx

-Torie
"We are angels of hope, of healing, and of light. Darkness flees from us." -YP 
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Enn

Such great ideas and activities! Keep em coming!
I do think about self care a lot and want to enrich my life little by little.  It can be the smallest of things that mean so much. Like a little chat with a friend.
I sometimes go to the local humane society and think about my next pet. And sometimes they let me play with the animals. Love those kittens/cats! 

I saw recently, the idea of a self care box! It sounded familiar and likely I saw that here somewhere. I was pleased to be reminded of it. 

The idea is to get a nice box and add things to it that you like. It may have different sensory objects like something that smells nice, another that looks nice, feels nice. Cards with affirmations on them. A note about a great memory, whatever is meaningful to you. Pictures that make you smile . The box can be used to help
calm when you are distressed. 

 

We can do that for ourselves or our kids. It is also called a soothing box or self soothing box. It may help to distract your child . It gives them a small fun project to work on, think about and organize. It can be brought out during a stressful time. 

if the objects lose their magic,
exchange  them for new items.


💐

When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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Enn
https://pro.psychcentral.com/psychoeducation/2017/05/using-a-calming-box-for-self-soothing-and-emotional-regulation/
When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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Enn
Taking care ED is really exhausting, physically and emotionally and sometimes we can get to a point, where it is hard to care about it all. This is called compassion fatigue and can happen to caregivers, professionals .... anyone who gives of themselves to help others. Carrying that burden is a huge task. How can one thrive in that, how can one not sometimes buckle with the weight?

https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/high-octane-women/201407/are-you-suffering-compassion-fatigue
http://transitionalsupport.com.au/transitional-phase/compassion-fatigue-trauma/
https://www.camh.ca/en/camh-news-and-stories/is-there-a-cost-to-protecting-caring-for-and-saving-others-beware-of-compassion-fatigue

I think this was important to put on this thread as it is something we can miss. We mention our own PTSD etc and how we need to take care of ourselves, but sometimes we don't even know what is happening to us and sometimes we have just had enough.
When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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Enn
When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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Enn
When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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Enn
This topic (compassion fatigue) really hits home for me and my time with ED, sadly.
I lost myself and am finding myself again. If you feel any of this could be you, please get aid.

https://www.eatingrecoverycenter.com/families/portal/resource-center/compassion-fatigue-parents-of-children-with-eating-disorders

https://more-love.org/2016/10/14/moms-who-have-kids-with-eating-disorders-are-at-high-risk-for-compassion-fatigue/

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4459460/pdf/12888_2015_Article_507.pdf
When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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PurpleRain
Hanks for posting this Enn, it definitely hit home for me too, and it helps to know I'm not alone (sadly, I wish none of us would feel like this)
13 yo d started to eat "healthy" September 2018, she had a growth spurt a bit later, followed by tummy bug. She started restricting breakfast and school lunch in January 2019 (that we know). We succesfully refed at home.
I have found inner strenght, patience and compassion that I did not know I had.
Never retreat, never surrender
keep feeding
 
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Enn
Bumping this up. Why? Because at this time the whole world is being cautious and mindful about keeping a safe distance from others. You may be self isolating or in quarantine. Remember this is not forever, but it can be very difficult to get through. 

The loss of the  structure of our lives that move us through our days is gone right now- time for a new routine. Things may be chaotic right now. Try to create a formal structure for the home. Find something to plan in the day for yourself and for the family. Maybe pick up a topic for the family to learn. (I am into astronomy- Venus looks amazing tonight!!). Ask the family what they want to do/learn. 

Social isolation/distancing can affect your mental health.
Please be aware, take care of yourself and please don't panic. 
https://www.itv.com/news/central/2020-03-17/self-isolation-protecting-your-mental-health-during-the-coronavirus-outbreak/

https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/coronavirus-mental-health-self-isolate-how-to-manage-quarantine-a9404431.html
The reason we are doing this (social distancing) is to take care of our more vulnerable populations. We are keeping our neighbours safe. No it is not fun. It is hard. For most it is not an imminent danger and remember most 80% have mild self limiting illness. Like caring for our kids but now we are caring for the whole community. With that in mind, we are saving lives.
 
Practice self care.
Take a break from the news, read a book or two or three. Watch a funny show or movie. FaceTime friends, go for a walk or bike ride. 
We are all in this together. We really are. We are closer together than you know. We are sharing this worldwide experience. You are not alone. 
Sending hugs and good thoughts to everyone. 
When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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Enn
@PleaseEAT,

That is a very moving poem. 
Thank you!
Sending best to you and your family. 
When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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FEAST
Absolutely love this Enn, thank you for posting! 
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Enn

At this time during the pandemic,  connecting  is even more important than usual. 
Being told to stay put even if you normally would have, can make us antsy. I know that is what happens to me.

I have now booked a FaceTime date once a week with a friend that I normally see every few months! I had ‘tea’ time with another on FaceTime where we  had the lovely china and pretty teapots - we had a blast!

please reach out if you are feeling lonely. It can be so therapeutic.
🌿

When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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Enn

You know, I feel better when I get dressed up and put on jewelry and make up. 
I am going to work but I am alone in my office.  
It is just what I like to do. It makes me feel more normal.
What makes you feel normal in this abnormal time?
👗 

When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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Enn
This weekend, Easter, maybe different for many. I acknowledge that it may not feel comfortable, and it can still be nice. 
A few thoughts: 
  • Make a great dinner. Even if there are less people, just think there will be leftovers and no need to cook for a few days 
  • do a virtual Easter dinner. There are so many ways to do it, and some people are connecting from all over the world and in real time. This is the time to reach out connect and get the connection for yourself. 

  • you could do a virtual scavenger hunt. For example you hide the hidden eggs or treats in your home . You give the other person hints/ map on how to find the eggs in your home and walk around with your laptop or phone as they try to find them.
  • decorate your windows and say hello to your neighbours 
  • make a sign that greets your neighbours and drive it around and honk as you go by - you will likely make a new friend and isn’t it nice to be thought of? 
  • i have seen some lovely ideas of family members going to a long term care facility and serenading their loved ones through open windows and just visiting via phone.

Do you have an idea you may wish to share? You never know what may click with someone and can really make their day.

I am sending love and kindness you way this weekend. When we are able to get together again, it will be so sweet. Please hold on to that.
I am sending my wishes that you and your loved ones stay safe and healthy and connected. 

❤️

When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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deenl
Great ideas, Enn
2015 12yo son restricting but no body image issues, no fat phobia; lost weight IP! Oct 2015 home, stable but no progress. Medical hosp to kick start recovery Feb 2016. Slowly and cautiously gaining weight at home and seeing signs of our real kid.

May 2017 Hovering around WR. Mood great, mostly. Building up hour by hour at school after 18 months at home. Summer 2017 Happy, first trip away in years, food variety, begin socialising. Sept 2017, back to school FT first time in 2 years. [thumb] 2018 growing so fast hard to keep pace with weight
  • Swedish proverb: Love me when I least deserve it because that's when I need it most.
  • We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence Recovery, then, is not an act but a habit. Aristotle.
  • If the plan doesn't work, change the plan but never the goal.
  • We cannot control the wind but we can direct the sail.
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Kali


We are holding a virtual family google hangouts event where we can all be together for a celebration in each our own homes, because we are all under a stay at home and isolate mandate. I'm organizing it and don't know how it will work out...but it is fun to try. And everyone is coming! Hey it is not like we have anywhere else we have to be. 


Kali

Food=Love
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Enn
I will add that many faiths have religious events this weekend . I do not wish to be remiss in not mentioning Passover also this weekend.

I will quote an old children’s song here, 🎶 the more we get together, together, together, the more we get together, the happier we will be. 🎵  such true words.

❤️

When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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Enn
I remembered that song today and now I cannot get it out of my head!!😁
When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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MKR
Great ideas, @Enn.

You have reminded me of the days when our kids were little.

Birthdays:
We celebrated ALL birthdays together with family on the other side of the world. I baked a small birthday cake in the birthday person's honour. Our kids sang Happy Birthday, blew the candles and cut the cake. So my mum and other family watched on their birthdays, as well as our own. It was so sweet when we all huddled together around our screens.

Mini concerts:
The kids regularly played their instruments over Skype - I know, don't make kids perform... - but they chose the piece. The effect was that they practiced harder having got a great buzz from the applause across the globe.
Mum's Kitchen

14-y-o "healthy living" led to AN in 2017 and WR at 16. Current muscle dysmorphia.
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Enn

I think that playing the instruments on SKYPE is a great idea and so is having those birthday parties from afar. 

We live in a time where physical distance is really not an excuse not to get together and we can still see and hear each other!
🌎

When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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MKR
Enn wrote:
We live in a time where physical distance is really not an excuse not to get together and we can still see and hear each other!

🌎



You are right @Enn. We are fortunate. I am old enough to remember air-mail envelopes from family overseas taking good two weeks to arrive, to be read aloud to all. Face to face conversations are on a completely different level!
Mum's Kitchen

14-y-o "healthy living" led to AN in 2017 and WR at 16. Current muscle dysmorphia.
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Enn
I need more ideas please...😁
thanks😘
When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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