F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

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Help4D
i am feeling insensed that my non-ED D (age 12) was made to exercise so excessively in school PE that she threw up in a bin in class.  They were doing burpees (one every 5 seconds for 7 minutes).  D is not unfit; she's a dancer.  D has OCD and perfectionism and may have been pushing herself.

I know that my ED D would have loved that type of exercise at school in PE class when she was younger and actively disordered.

I am wondering what I should say to school about this.  Any ideas?
Susan
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deenl
Hi Help4D,

Just something I have found useful when dealing with general school probs; I find that my kids generally interpret what happened through their own eyes (don't we all!) so I usually chat a bit with other parents to get a more general picture. If I want to talk to the teacher I take a more matter-of-fact, inquiring tone. That way they don't get defensive and you usually hear their point-of-view and their reasoning behind the actions. At that stage you have all the info you need to either let it go or request some sort of change.

Please don't take this up the wrong way but it might be a good idea to keep a really good eye on non ED daughters food input. EDs are heritable to a certain degree and although I am still a newbie from what I have read OCD, perfectionism, dancing would not be uncommon when developing an ED. Please ignore this comment if it doesn't fit with your circumstances.

Good Luck with the school,
D
2015 12yo son restricting but no body image issues, no fat phobia; lost weight IP! Oct 2015 home, stable but no progress. Medical hosp to kick start recovery Feb 2016. Slowly and cautiously gaining weight at home and seeing signs of our real kid.

May 2017 Hovering around WR. Mood great, mostly. Building up hour by hour at school after 18 months at home. Summer 2017 Happy, first trip away in years, food variety, begin socialising. Sept 2017, back to school FT first time in 2 years. [thumb] 2018 growing so fast hard to keep pace with weight
  • Swedish proverb: Love me when I least deserve it because that's when I need it most.
  • We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence Recovery, then, is not an act but a habit. Aristotle.
  • If the plan doesn't work, change the plan but never the goal.
  • We cannot control the wind but we can direct the sail.
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Help4D
Thank you.  It turns out that the kids could have stopped if they wanted, but my OCD D kept going to achieve the maximum number!  Yes, I have my eye closely on her to make sure she does not start down the slippery slope of food restriction.

The good news is that AN D (age 19, diagnosed at 10) is doing much better.  She has been in treatment for 15 months in Miami.  She just had a bit of a weight loss after a visit home, but the centre are on top of it.  Still a way to go and I am aware that there is plenty of scope for things to go wrong, but better than in a long time.
Susan
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Help4D
The latest thing to happen in PE for my 12 year old is that the kids were asked to cycle on exercise bikes and had a competition to see who could burn the most calories.   

I need to write to school about this ASAP.  These children are expat children attending an international school.  These is no sign of any of these kids being overweight.   There is however a large number of kids who display perfectionist qualities and may be vulnerable to ED.

Can anyone direct me to anything handy that I could use as a  crib to get all the right points over that 12 year olds do not need to be taught about burning calories?   This school will not take criticism well, so I need to write this well. 
Susan
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deenl
I have no specific ideas at the moment but I will keep my eyes open because this is something I want to do for our school also.

Anyone else any ideas?

Cheers,
D
2015 12yo son restricting but no body image issues, no fat phobia; lost weight IP! Oct 2015 home, stable but no progress. Medical hosp to kick start recovery Feb 2016. Slowly and cautiously gaining weight at home and seeing signs of our real kid.

May 2017 Hovering around WR. Mood great, mostly. Building up hour by hour at school after 18 months at home. Summer 2017 Happy, first trip away in years, food variety, begin socialising. Sept 2017, back to school FT first time in 2 years. [thumb] 2018 growing so fast hard to keep pace with weight
  • Swedish proverb: Love me when I least deserve it because that's when I need it most.
  • We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence Recovery, then, is not an act but a habit. Aristotle.
  • If the plan doesn't work, change the plan but never the goal.
  • We cannot control the wind but we can direct the sail.
Quote

        

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