F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

Welcome to F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum. This is a free service provided for parents of those suffering from eating disorders. It is moderated by kind, experienced, parent caregivers trained to guide you in how to use the forum and how to find resources to help you support your family member. This forum is for parents of patients with all eating disorder diagnoses, all ages, around the world.

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bakeyser
Hi,

We are almost a  month into refeeding...which is going very slow..not gaining the weight that we wanted our 14 yr old D to. 
I am wondering if we should make a lot of different things and have her get used to eating a large variety of things, even foods that to her are on her Fear foods, so that the brain can start to rewire the neural pathways, and help our D realize that food is not to be feared.

Thanks,

bakeyser
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debra18
In my experience it's better to keep basically the same meal plan everyday to get into routine and get her gaining. You will have a better idea of how much calories she is getting and how to increase. When she is gaining steadily you can start introducing fear foods. You may need the fear foods only because it is necessary for the calories. Like chocolate or ice cream
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teecee
Personally we never counted calories...never did before ED and didn’t want to start with that when we were trying to stop her doing it.
For us the sooner we introduced fear foods the sooner we tackled the behaviours. We introduced variety...but that’s just my opinion.
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bakeyser
We are mainly using the same basic foods for snacks, which are muffins or shakes, and just basic things for breakfast, oatmeal with whipping cream mixed in, lunch, whatever family is having, and dinner, usually once again ,whatever family is having. 

Thanks,

bakeyser
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bbs1968
Hi bakeyser,
We are refeeding dd 14 for 8 weeks now. We try to introduce some fear foods twice a week.We have found when we stick to the same safe foods she dosent gain. She is up and down all the time. Our ED clinic says she can eat what we eat but has to have a lot extra. Most of her meals are a little different from ours as I add to them. We havent gone near chocolate or cakes yet but are introducing the desserts tomorrow as she  is still not getting enough calories with 3 meals and 3 snacks.
She has just finished school and we have her on bed rest as she was down this week. We are hoping she sees that more calories will allow out with her friends or else its going to be a long summer.
All the best
bbs1968
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Enn
Toothfairy, 
That is a great video! Merci!

When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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Torie
bbs1968 wrote:
Our ED clinic says she can eat what we eat but has to have a lot extra.


That's the ticket.

It REALLY sucks that the only people on the planet who want to eat less, have to eat more.  Most here have been surprised by the volume/number of calories needed for recovery.  But it is what it is.  If she isn't gaining on x calories, she needs x + more.

Keep swimming. xx

-Torie
"We are angels of hope, of healing, and of light. Darkness flees from us." -YP 
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