F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

Welcome to F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum. This is a free service provided for parents of those suffering from eating disorders. It is moderated by kind, experienced, parent caregivers trained to guide you in how to use the forum and how to find resources to help you support your family member. This forum is for parents of patients with all eating disorder diagnoses, all ages, around the world.

Join these conversations already in progress:
• Road To Recovery - Stories of Hope
• Events for Parents and Caregivers Around the World
• Free F.E.A.S.T Conference Videos

Visit the F.E.A.S.T website for information and support.

If you need help using the forum please reach out to one of the moderators (listed below), or email us at bronwen@feast-ed.org.

Need to talk with another parent? F.E.A.S.T. parents offer peer support via:

debra18
I have been looking at these posts for a few months but didn't write my own post. I live in NYC. My daughter started restricting at the end of the summer. I am an LCSW and knew the symptoms of anorexia right away. But I couldn't understand why a healthy 11 year old with no trigger could suddenly have anorexia. I started spending more time with her and tried to figure out what was going on. In 6 weeks she lost almost 20 pounds and she had been skinny to begin with. Than I discovered the refeeding resources. I had the pediatrician check her blood and her electrolytes were fine. I began refeeding using this forum and Eva Musby''s videos. I started seeing progress right away. When she started hiding food in pockets I arranged for her to be supervised in school. She now has gained back more than half of her weight and I am tackling all fear foods one by one. I am slowly getting my daughter back. I am an LCSW that has been working with kids in schools for several years. I hope that I can be a necessary link between parent and therapists as it seems that it might be necessary. Magic plate really does work even though it has been very difficult work so far. Thank you for everyone that posts as this forum saved my daughter.
Quote
Kali
Hi Debra18,

Welcome to ATDT! I'm so happy to hear that you have found the posts here helpful and you have written a post about your experience with your daughter which can also add to the conversation and help other parents grappling with a child with an eating disorder. It sounds as though you are doing well with your daughter's refeeding and things are moving in the right direction. And that because of your training, you were able to catch this early on.

Quote:
But I couldn't understand why a healthy 11 year old with no trigger could suddenly have anorexia.


Many parents have found that there doesn't need to be a psychological "trigger" to set off an eating disorder. It can be something as simple as a negative energy balance from an illness or just having a period of time where not enough is eaten, and then a person with a genetic predisposition can develop an eating disorder. In our case I realized (too late) that my d., who was running track, had not been eating enough to support her level of exercise, and she probably had an energy deficit for some time before the eating disorder truly set in. 

Here is a link to the issuu version of the FEAST cookbook, if you want to take a look at some recipes parents have used during refeeding. 

https://issuu.com/bookemon/docs/bookemon_feast_family_recipies_3203

and our high calorie thread, if you have not already taken a look at this:

http://www.aroundthedinnertable.org/post?id=696425#gsc.tab=0

warmly,

Kali
Food=Love
Quote
ValentinaGermania
Hi debra18,
where have you been all that time? Only lurking around? I feel sad that you did not dare to login earlier, we would have liked to hear all little steps of your d´s progress. Please come here more often and tell us how you are doing.

"But I couldn't understand why a healthy 11 year old with no trigger could suddenly have anorexia."
Since Mai 2017 we know now that it is a gen defect and you do not need to have a bad family or sexual abuse or aim to be a model to get AN.
I know a boy who went down the rabbit hole after a simple stomach intestinal infection which made him lose only 2 kg and AN took over.

So great to hear that your d is doing better!
Tina72
Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
Quote
debra18
What can I do to start correcting information people are given? I had a very hard time convincing the school and pediatrician that there wasn't an underlying issue. I had a baby during this time too. Just between refeeding and taking care of the baby my brain wasn't able to come up with a post or argue with the doctor and the school. Eventually the school did start working together with me.
Quote
ValentinaGermania
I had luck with school too, they were great.
It will take years and decades to correct the bad information people have about that disease. We can only try to talk openly and to inform the people who try to listen to us. Most of them have there opinion done before we open our mouth. I lost all friends and rest of family, only one true friend is left and she has diabetes and knows what I am talking about. Such a strange and sad world with ED.
Do you know Carrie Arnolds great book "Decoding anorexia"? She is a former patient and now a bio-chemist and it is so interesting. I nodded with my head on every second page. Everything she said about the typical ED patient fitted with my d from day one after her birth.

I hope more information in society will help to prevent EDs in future. If I had known anything about our risk for that, we would not have gone that way.
Tina72
Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
Quote
sk8r31
The FEAST Family Guides and the Academy of Eating Disorders Medical Care standards pamphlet are available as pdf files and could be either emailed or printed out to take to school personnel or medical team.

Take the best possible care of yourself during this challenging time.

Sending warm support,
sk8r31


It is good to not only hope to be successful, but to expect it and accept it--Maya Angelou
Quote
Kali
Hi Debra,

Research has shown anorexia to be a brain disorder; someone with anorexia literally makes choices about food from a different part of the brain than people without eating disorders. There are also genetic links which help create vulnerability to the disorder and may affect metabolism.

However there are many people who are not familiar with recent research, and when people start talking about "underlying issues" that is an old school way of approaching eating disorders.

You can read some of the materials in the learning center and see if anything is appropriate to give to the school to help them get up to date on EDs. For example the brochure called Puzzling Symptoms, Eating Disorders and the Brain.

http://www.feast-ed.org/?page=neuroguide

There is some interesting recent research coming out of Duke University into the genetics of Anorexia, and some interesting research coming out of Columbia about brain differences in people with Anorexia.

warmly,

Kali
Food=Love
Quote
Torie
sk8r31 wrote:
The FEAST Family Guides and the Academy of Eating Disorders Medical Care standards pamphlet are available as pdf files and could be either emailed or printed out to take to school personnel or medical team.


I need to order more of these to drop of at school and my doctor's office.  They have racks of free information and they put these out when I do remember to take them in.

I think my d got really tired of having to explain that she has great friends, a great family, a great school, and no one ever did anything meaner to her other than the normal childhood squabbles.  Her (heartbreaking) conclusion was that "I don't deserve this life, and someone else should have it."

One by one, we are educating the world about ED.

Congrats on your good work with your d. xx

-Torie
"We are angels of hope, of healing, and of light. Darkness flees from us." -YP 
Quote

        

WTadmin