F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

Welcome to F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum. This is a free service provided for parents of those suffering from eating disorders. It is moderated by kind, experienced, parent caregivers trained to guide you in how to use the forum and how to find resources to help you support your family member. This forum is for parents of patients with all eating disorder diagnoses, all ages, around the world.

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roadtorecovery
The time immediately after eating is still difficult.  She's struggling with bad body dysmorphia.  

Is there anything that you've found that we can do to help her?  It's so difficult to watch the struggle going on inside her head...
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workingthrough
Sending a hug. 

We did/do a lot of movies, shows, you tube clips - esp. funnier ones. 

When the weather is okay (and if she’s weight-restored) could you go for a small walk? 

Maybe a hands on project of sorts? A sticker puzzle book, needlework, art? Would she go for any of those things? 

S really struggled after meals, esp. in the beginning. Sometimes still with fear foods, desserts, etc. 

I don’t think medication is the answer - but does she have any co-morbities? S is on something for anxiety and although it doesn’t make everything better, it did help some. 

Thinking of you.

just editing to add - does she care for others or have any opportunities to serve? I wonder if she could write notes or draw pictures for an elderly home or neighbor? maybe make something for someone? walking dogs for the humane society? maybe? (all depending on her weight, etc. - in the very beginning we just had to sit with s and keep him safe - but in time we were able to add a few of the ideas mentioned). 
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Ellenc1
We had exactly the same problems after eating with my d. As soon as she had eaten we would go for a little drive, wander around the shops, anything to try and take her mind off of it. After a while she started improving, and would then sit and do the mindful colouring books, whIch she loved doing. It really will get better in time, keep pushing.d is now on medication for her anxiety but I’m not sure that would of helped early on.
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debra18
My daughter started piano lessons. She goes straight to the piano after eating. Any distractions are good.
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Enn
Although we want to keep them from distress, they will have to learn to calm themselves during that time. Distractions can of course help and over time things hopefully will get better. I am reminded when we were trying to extinguish all the standing my d was doing (every waking moment) the first few minutes of sitting were so excruciating for her  and so I made her sit through half hour at first then one hour etc. After the first few minutes she realized nothing bad was going to happen then her panic dissipated bit by bit. It is exposure to those feelings, as well as the food over time that can help as well as some distractions while they are eating.
We all find what works or doesn’t work for our own situations. Try something and see how it goes, we sometimes learn more from what did not work as we learn to be more ingenious the next time. I never thought I was a creative thinker, well, ED ,thanks for showing me that I am!!
When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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Mamaroo
I showed my d optical illusions, either in a book or on the tablet. It taught her that her mind can play tricks on her and that you can't always believe your eyes. My favourite is the dress illusion, even though I know the dress is blue and black it still looks white and gold to me.

It will get better, sending you lots of hugs 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗
D became obsessed with exercise at age 9 and started eating 'healthy' at age 9.5. Restricting couple of months later. IP for 2 weeks at age 10. Slowly refed for months on Ensures alone, followed by swap over with food at a snails pace. WR after a year at age 11 in March 2017. View my recipes on my YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCKLW6A6sDO3ZDq8npNm8_ww
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roadtorecovery
Thank you!
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ValentinaGermania
Distraction, distraction, distraction. Whatever is needed to keep her mind busy, then she will have no time for ED thoughts. It gets better after a while. Try to get through that phase!
Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
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