F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

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Good morning from the UK. Bit of a vent here which I'm feeling slightly guilty about as our story is possibly much less traumatic than many on here.
So, 9 year old boy, wr for 30 seconds then growing upwards...
We've been on school holidays this week and it has been a HUGE change from the last long holiday when we were in the thick of refeeding and diagnosis and a million and one hospital visits. Our s is soooo much better in so many ways. At the start of the week he was cracking jokes, enjoying walks in woods, trips to a museum and reading again. Yay!
Then we had Halloween....
The day was great and then later on he got really excited about dressing up for a friend's party that the whole family had been invited to. However, when we got there, the first game was to eat a doughnut hanging on a string. He froze in terror. The next game was eating chocolate with witch's fingers on. He turned a whiter shade of pale than his face paint. And so it went on. So the long shot is a fairly horrendous couple of days culminating in a big teary, shouty melt down last night...I realise that this is not a quick or smooth path to recovery but it sure takes a lot of strength doesn't it? I just think that a 9 year old boy should have a fairly happy and trouble free childhood and it's heart breaking that he hasn't.
Apologies for the long waffle but didn't know where else in life to put it.
Welcome to Shani btw, on the other thread. It seems that it's a bit of a dance rather than a straight sprint. Wishing everyone a good day with food going on and children coming back.
It is so sad when they cannot do all these normal things. We have no Halloween here but I remember Christmas and birthday in the dark days.
Only thing I can say is that it was a very big difference the year later. I am very sure your little boy will have a nice Halloween next year again.
And please no apologies for waffles or venting, this is the right and (in many cases) the only place to do it. We understand.

Keep on fighting! You are on the right path. It will get better next year.
I send you a big hug.

Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
Thanks Tina, you are so good with the right words at the right time.
Many thanks for the daily warm words of wisdom x
Mcmum wrote:
So, 9 year old boy, wr for 30 seconds then growing upwards..

Lol. I'm laughing out loud here! Our son got sick when he was 12 and is now 16 and this is the best description ever.

I hope you touched wood when you said you were having an easier time. Don't jinx it!

I found it very sad in the beginning that my son was dealing with such a serious illness at such a young age. I comforted myself that this was actually a good thing. Counter intuitive I know. But the younger ones do seem to get to a more solid recovery because they are in a recovery oriented environment for the guts of 10 years. Kartini clinic has a great blog that I found very helpful.

BTW this Halloween our son ate and enjoyed a generous portion of our family's traditional Toad in the Hole with onion gravy. Before he was ill I would take it for granted but I savoured watching him eat 10 times more than my own food.

It will be better next year, I'm sure.

Warm wishes

2015 12yo son restricting but no body image issues, no fat phobia; lost weight IP! Oct 2015 home, stable but no progress. Medical hosp to kick start recovery Feb 2016. Slowly and cautiously gaining weight at home and seeing signs of our real kid.

May 2017 Hovering around WR. Mood great, mostly. Building up hour by hour at school after 18 months at home. Summer 2017 Happy, first trip away in years, food variety, begin socialising. Sept 2017, back to school FT first time in 2 years. [thumb] 2018 growing so fast hard to keep pace with weight
  • Swedish proverb: Love me when I least deserve it because that's when I need it most.
  • We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence Recovery, then, is not an act but a habit. Aristotle.
  • If the plan doesn't work, change the plan but never the goal.
  • We cannot control the wind but we can direct the sail.
I long for the day when my son eats voluntarily with gusto! What other 9 year old knows the calorific content of each and every food item known to man????

You give me hope deenl that there is life after ed!! 🙏 🙄
I had no idea the UK had Halloween. You can look forward to next year being better. Next year at this time you will look back and see how far you came.
I can say that from my experience with the holidays. We are working on exposure to doughnuts. The first step is I am buying them for my other kids and my daughter sees them in the house. I hope by Chanukah she will be eating them!
Oh dang, so sorry for the trauma.   It occurs to me that this is a good demonstration of why they need to be able to eat all the things - donuts and chocolate included - because no one should have to have their day / holiday ruined in this way.  So if he ever asks why does he need to eat x or y, you can remind him of this experience as an example of all foods being good and necessary in moderation.

As the others say, I'm sure next year will be much better.  Keep swimming xx

"We are angels of hope, of healing, and of light. Darkness flees from us." -YP 

Your poor boy! He was so upset. This is part of it all . So now you will work on all of this stuff and it WILL be better not even next year, but for the other upcoming holidays, I am sure! 
All the best,


When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)