F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

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So after 6 weeks in hospital and being told she was suffering from anorexia (16kg self inflicted weight loss, hatred of eating etc etc) we're now told she has severe anxiety and they are discharging us.  No support has been offered to us apart from the opportunity to buy a pile of fortisip to take home with us.  They're giving us a week before they discharge her to give us time to get things in place.  But what things??!!  GP, Psychologist etc I assume?  Totally confused but very pleased to be getting her home, even if I have no idea what I'm doing!  Anyone else been down this road?
15.5 year old daughter diagnosed anorexic January 2020. Currently doing FBT after a 2 month hospital admission. Very very slow going.  

We were told by CAMHS 6 months into the illness that she was recovered and to forget the diagnosis and just get on with our lives 🙄...that was summertime 2018.....she is still recovering now and not 100% just yet.  

Can you present pizza, chips and ice cream? Is it no problem to eat? If not then the diagnosis is correct and you should continue with feeding often. Food is medicine. 

This does sound like a very worrying turn of events. I wonder what made them change their mind?  One of the interesting things about eating disorders is that they are in fact classified as an anxiety related disorder. Given your D's severe restriction about eating with you it is very worrying that they have said this is just anxiety. This is not normal behaviour anxiety eating about others sounds much more like an ED than just anxiety. 
D diagnosed restrictive AN June 2010 age 13. Initially weight restored 2012. Relapse and continuously edging towards recovery. Treatment: multiple hospitalisations and individual and family therapy.
I wonder if this is their way of freeing up beds.  It is easy to believe she has severe anxiety, but that in no way means that she doesn't have AN, too.  I hope your d has not heard them say that.

I'm not sure how to find effective support via Skye, but I know many have reported positive experiences with that.  If you are interested, I'm sure people here can make specific suggestions.

THey should help you create Plan A, Plan B, and Plan C with Plan A being along the lines of "Here's your meal; please take a bite."

You will want to stock up on butter, rapeseed oil, double cream, nuts, full-fat yogurt, oatmeal, etc. 

If you have a partner, now is the time to make sure s/he is reading from the same book, page, line. 

Try to make sure you are well-rested in advance of your d's return.  You will need your strength. xx

"We are angels of hope, of healing, and of light. Darkness flees from us." -YP 
Oh they told her alright and she was furious!  Told them they'd lied to her.  Totally agree that we need to forget labels and just keep refeeding.  She's still majorly underweight and hates the thought of gaining weight.  Thankfully I'd not signed any contracts this year so I can work with her at home for as long as I need to.  Husband is incredibly supportive thank heavens!
15.5 year old daughter diagnosed anorexic January 2020. Currently doing FBT after a 2 month hospital admission. Very very slow going.  
The treatment teams etc seem sometimes to be part of the problem and not part of the solution. Why are there beds/exit/criteria in health care, it’s not compatible, you can’t tell someone they are healed and can walk if both their legs are broken but they appear to be able to do this with mental health and eating disorders.
Words fail me. 

Glad that your circumstances allow you to be home and you and your husband are a team. It's gonna be tough to get some momentum going after this blow. Stock your freezer and see if you can find other helpers among friends and family.

Anything in particular you are worried about that we can help you with. Apart from, you know, everything?

Warm wishes 

2015 12yo son restricting but no body image issues, no fat phobia; lost weight IP! Oct 2015 home, stable but no progress. Medical hosp to kick start recovery Feb 2016. Slowly and cautiously gaining weight at home and seeing signs of our real kid.

May 2017 Hovering around WR. Mood great, mostly. Building up hour by hour at school after 18 months at home. Summer 2017 Happy, first trip away in years, food variety, begin socialising. Sept 2017, back to school FT first time in 2 years. [thumb] 2018 growing so fast hard to keep pace with weight
  • Swedish proverb: Love me when I least deserve it because that's when I need it most.
  • We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence Recovery, then, is not an act but a habit. Aristotle.
  • If the plan doesn't work, change the plan but never the goal.
  • We cannot control the wind but we can direct the sail.
That sounds ridiculous.  In many ways anorexia IS an anxiety disorder for some.  The fact they felt they can separate the two seems highly questionable.  Hope you can keep  moving forward.

Thanks everyone, it's crazy times out there anyway so I'm pleased  to be having her come home.  Just hope we don't deal with her recovery the wrong way but I'm following all the sensible advice found on here and some great books.  Wish me luck, you'll no doubt see some SOS messages from me in the next few weeks!  Stay well everyone,
15.5 year old daughter diagnosed anorexic January 2020. Currently doing FBT after a 2 month hospital admission. Very very slow going.