F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

Welcome to F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum. This is a free service provided for parents of those suffering from eating disorders. It is moderated by kind, experienced, parent caregivers trained to guide you in how to use the forum and how to find resources to help you support your family member. This forum is for parents of patients with all eating disorder diagnoses, all ages, around the world.

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hopeful_mum
My d started restricting Mar '13 when she was 12 but wasn't diagnosed til Mar '14. Hospitalised from June - Oct '14. Since Oct '14 we've kept control of all her feeding and she has been fully WR since May '15. She has minimal choice and usually cannot deal with choices when we offer them to her. She still cannot feed herself and will restrict or lie about her intake if she is left to her own devises. Tonight she had a massive meltdown because we offered her chocolate mousse dessert but she wanted jelly sweets. She knows that as I prepare all her meals that both options would be the same calorific value so she wasn't trying to influence a lower calorie option. I'm just a little confused with this reaction. I know there is no logic or rationale to AN thinking but I can understand her refusing to eat something she deems too calorific, I can understand her trying to influence a lower calorie option but neither of these seems to fit this situation. So why would we have a meltdown over this? Anyone got any insight? It wasn't like a spoilt girl response (even if it was she is 14yo now so not usual for that age group) it was like her usual, big AN, refusing to budge meltdowns. We did relent in the end n gave her the jelly sweets as it didnt seem worth fighting over. It just seems so weird that one day you can be dealing with a meltdown coz they don't want to eat something n then a few days later you are dealing with a meltdown coz she's demanding to eat something that she's been thinking about n looking forward to but not thought to communicate it to us so we can prepare it for her. Any insight in understanding this sort of behaviour with AN. Think its the 1st time we've had this. Thanks.
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Torie
Maybe she's afraid of chocolate? Or thinks a fruit flavor is "healthier"? I think it was mamabear's d who always insisted on strawberry over chocolate even though she had always preferred chocolate. Just guessing though.

xx

-Torie
"We are angels of hope, of healing, and of light. Darkness flees from us." -YP 
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Psycho_Mom
Sigh. I don't know. But I send you a hug, and congrats on getting through another crazy meal. If she's gaining weight, they will get easier, I promise.

Some of my d's most feared foods were popcorn and vitamin water. Logic is not a featured symptom of this illness.

best wishes,


D diagnosed with EDNOS May 2013 at age 15, refed at home Aug 2013, since then symptoms gradually lessened and we retaught her how to feed and care for herself, including individual therapy, family skills DBT class, SSRI medication and relapse-prevention strategies. Anxiety was pre-existing and I believe she was sporadically restricting since about age 9. She now eats and behaves like any normal older teen, and is enjoying school, friends, sports, music and thinking about the future.
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Sotired
My d eats lots of lollies,I think because in her head they don't have fat in them,just sugar.(yes I know it doesn't make sense.)but you know,you got food in,same calorie equivalent,so three gold stars to you.sometimes the path has a few twists in it,these days I think,do what works.thats what mattered in the end.
Sotired42
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