F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

Welcome to F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum. This is a free service provided for parents of those suffering from eating disorders. It is moderated by kind, experienced, parent caregivers trained to guide you in how to use the forum and how to find resources to help you support your family member. This forum is for parents of patients with all eating disorder diagnoses, all ages, around the world.

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greekdude
Dear FEAST team!
Hello
our son (14.5 yrs old, now 181cm tall, 50Kg ) is entering the 2nd month of hospitalization in a children hospital in Greece.Some background : for over a year he has been having some strange eating habits. Somone had told him that he is "fat" although he was always skinny, and maybe this triggered the whole anorexia. For over a year he had been eating milk, sweets, muesli, cereals, cheese, yogurt. So not so much protein or fat. During this summer and specifically the vacations, we observed that something was terribly wrong. We weighed him 54 Kg. We even went to a pharmacy shop to buy some "orectic" vitamins/supplements (anorexia is a greek word btw, orectic means food which brings apetite), but to no avail. He would not touch those supplements at all. After the vacations, my father died, more stress added to my son. He also has hypothyroidism. September came, went to the doctor to check his T4, and he weighed him and measured his height, he found 180cm and 50Kg, which means he was going downhill since vacations.  (after lots and lots of research) we arranged an appoitment with the outpatient unit of the phychiatric dept of the children's hospital, early September. To be frank we had no idea what this thing was about. We knew it was "anorexia" but had no clue on the illness itself. After 4 sessions with the therapists there (who also work in the inpatient unit), the procedure went like : The therapists agreed with my son
- to maintain a detailed list of foods he ate
- to start eating first meal at 18:00 instead of ..... 23:00 as was his latest habit
- to reduce exercise
After one month the result :
The chief therapists call us all , couple + son, to ask us if we "agree" to go on. We said, of course we agree, we want to save our son. Additionally the chief therapist said to my son, that he can go there on foot every Friday. That's 3km on foot. REALLY!! for a kid with an eating disorder???? That freaked me out.
This very day, they planned for us some medical exams for next week. We cut short by doing some of the Friday exams on Tuesday, specifically the cardiology exams, pulse found to be .... 35 beats/min, which meant urgently in the hospital (the same hospital which houses the outpatient unit we were supposed to ... attend).
So start of October : Height 181 cm. Weight : 48 Kg. (that was his bottom all time low). After 2 days in the intensive care, he got admitted in the psychiatric dept. We were stripped of any right to talk to him or see him. All we got were some vague info coming from unwilling and rude doctors/nurses. We were informed that he takes anti-psychotic drugs and that he has been feeding extra by the tube.
Now the good news. After 1 month we started seeing him! And he looks much much better. He gained 3 Kg which means he is 50 Kg (cause I guess 1 was lost during the first days of refeeding due to refeeding syndrom thing). And they removed the tube.
The bad news : they mostly have managed everything via threats and some peculiar form of rewards, which might be taken as a threat, e.g. no family visit if ..... They threatened him of endo-gastric surgery, they are threatening now of re-installing the tube, or that by this rate he will be there till the easter, etc. They have some time limits regarding the meals, and if he misses the limit then start the threats.

So, ok, I am grateful they saved my son, and I thank them for that, but so many threats? What if those threats loose their effectiveness? What if we cannot cope with the same methods when he comes home?

Anyway, that's the current status. Son seems OK but some times cries when he remembers the threats. He cannot stand still, he's got like 10 meters to move all in all (the unit is small), they accuse him of having "anorexic" traits (yeah like it was his choice to get ill), and they start to threat again.

So my question is : If anorexia is basically stress, fear and anxiety, how is it on earth possible to fight it with stress, fear and anxiety?

Is there anything potentially bad with this in the long term that we should be vigilant about?

Thank you so much.
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Mamaroo
Welcome Greekdude and sorry you need to be here. What you have described is strange tactics from the hospital. It is good that he has gained weight there and your son does seem to respond to the carrot and stick method, which you can modify to get him to eat at home. We used incentives to get my d to eat (tablet time and money for each completed meal), the stick was going back to hospital (she also had the tube). Today, several years after WR, my d doesn't remember any of it, and it is common that they don't remember. She remembers the hospital and that school was difficult, but none of the tandrums and difficult times of refeeding, unlike us. 

At home we tried to make the atmosphere as calm as possible, we took away all other stressors. My d found school very hard, so she missed a lot  because she couldn't cope, slowly as the weight went up, she was able to attend school full day again. A good thread to look up is Deenl' super resistor thread. Here's the link
D became obsessed with exercise at age 9 and started eating 'healthy' at age 9.5. Restricting couple of months later. IP for 2 weeks at age 10. Slowly refed for months on Ensures alone, followed by swap over with food at a snails pace. WR after a year at age 11 in March 2017. View my recipes on my YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCKLW6A6sDO3ZDq8npNm8_ww
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Torie
Hi GreekDude,
So sorry you needed to join us here.  Many of their ideas and processes seem ... surprising ... but really, if he is gaining weight, they must be doing some things right.

To me, it makes sense for them to explain that if he is unable to take enough nutrients by mouth, they will need to reinsert the tube.  I don't see that as a threat - it is simply what has to happen to beat this vile illness.  (Kind of like a cancer patient might be told chemo will restart if that illness makes a comeback.)  

I also think it's okay that they have time limits for him to finish his meals.  You said otherwise there are "threats." Are these threats something like if he doesn't finish on time, he will have to have liquid nutritional supplement?  And if he can't manage that in time, he will have the ng tube reinserted?  Unfortunately, this is the type of thing that is needed when patients are very ill and simply cannot manage to eat enough.

You asked, "What if we cannot cope with the same methods when he comes home?"

That is a great question for his team.  It is good to have a Plan A (what you hope will happen), a Plan B, and a Plan C.  Plan A would be that he finishes what you serve (ideally fairly promptly).  Plan B might be a nutritional supplement if he can't finish in time.  Plan C might be that you return him to the clinic for feeding if you are unable to get enough nutrients in at home.

Again, the most important thing - by far - is that he is regaining the weight he has lost.  So it seems that there are some very big plusses amid the oddities.

Please feel free to ask all the questions you like. xx

-Torie
"We are angels of hope, of healing, and of light. Darkness flees from us." -YP 
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Kali
Hi Greekdude,

Welcome to this club nobody wants to be a member of. 

As Torie says, it is good that he has gained some weight. That is very important right now.

Your son's thought processes are most likely distorted while he is so underweight. So the illness may be making him experience food as a threat, and anyone who tries to get him to eat as threatening. But In reality, the caregivers in the hospital may simply be letting him know that he needs to eat and if he cannot, then the tube may be placed or he will need a supplement or he may need to remain in the hospital for a very long time. Often a series of rewards are used. So for example when my daughter was in the hospital, if she completed her meals she could gain privileges and that was an incentive to cooperate with treatment. 

How does his hypothyroidism play into all of this? Can this condition and the medications given for it affect weight and the heart? 

warmly,

Kali

Food=Love
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greekdude
Dear Mods, Members,
first off, thank you so much for your prompt responses. The feeling of not being alone in all this is such a valuable asset, a great relief. I want to correct a spelling error I did : Our son is now 50Kg not 53Kg. So he went from 48 (admission)->47 (due to start of refeeding)->50 now. But the weighing was done on different scales, nobody gives us exact numbers and all the parameters.

Also what I missed to write : just 3 days before this tuesday when he got admitted, start of October, I had bought Eva Musby's book. Just by reading exerpts from Ch. 6, the very next day (Monday) we were able to make him sit on the table. If he managed to eat we dont know. We didnt surveil (it was done with only half day of reading on the subject). I guess he didn't eat. But it was a huge success just talking to him and making him sit. It was apparent that he asked for help, while holding some dignity. If only we knew what was going on since June, if only we had some proper guideance, some education. Now he is surely losing one year from his life struggling with this. I am stunned on the level of ignorance among pediatricians, school, etc on the matter.

Dear @Mamaroo Thank you for the courage and the valuable info and the link!So glad your D made it! Just some questions :
- When you refer to strange tactics you mean their strategy against parents visiting earlier or their methods during meals?
- what is WR?

Dear @Torie Thank you for your help! When you refer to "surprising" and "oddities" again, like I asked Mamaroo, I guess you mean the parentectomy part?

Dear @Kali , thank you for giving us faith to the hospital. We need it badly. Every tear of my son is an arrow to our heart. About the hypothyroidism, I don't know. It is supposed to make kids fat and short. Mine was always skinny and tall. I doubt it interacts with any of the medical aspects of weight or the heart. But it surely worsens the anxiety. Hypothyroidism means disturbed balance of hormons. Plus the puberty factor, and it all becomes a complex system.
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Torie
greekdude wrote:
Dear @Torie Thank you for your help! When you refer to "surprising" and "oddities" again, like I asked Mamaroo, I guess you mean the parentectomy part?
 
1. Not allowing you to see him.
2. Allowing him to walk so far.
3. Allowing him to have his first meal at 18:00

Ideally, we like to see 1 to 2 kg weight gain per week.  The sooner the weight back on, the better.  Yes, all this causes stress and anxiety - everything about eating does with AN.  Usually that cannot be avoided. xx

-Torie
"We are angels of hope, of healing, and of light. Darkness flees from us." -YP 
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Mamaroo
What Torie said.

WR means weight restored. I have to add that the weight restored number changes with time. So my d weighed what she needed to weigh at age 11, that was when she was weight restored. But, she needed to gain several kgs per year as any normal child her age would do to remain WR. And, the amount of calories needed to gain the normal amount of weight is typically higher than for a non ED (eating disorder) child. They can stay in a hyper metabolic state for 6 months to 2 years (in our case) after WR and some has higher calorie needs for ever. Do not let any Dr tell you to give a 'normal' amount of calories at WR or that no more weight gain is necessary after WR. That is when relapses happen.
D became obsessed with exercise at age 9 and started eating 'healthy' at age 9.5. Restricting couple of months later. IP for 2 weeks at age 10. Slowly refed for months on Ensures alone, followed by swap over with food at a snails pace. WR after a year at age 11 in March 2017. View my recipes on my YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCKLW6A6sDO3ZDq8npNm8_ww
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greekdude
Thank you Torie

Torie wrote:
 
1. Not allowing you to see him.
2. Allowing him to walk so far.
3. Allowing him to have his first meal at 18:00

Ideally, we like to see 1 to 2 kg weight gain per week.  The sooner the weight back on, the better.  Yes, all this causes stress and anxiety - everything about eating does with AN.  Usually that cannot be avoided. xx

-Torie

About 1. it seems (from what I read) to be a common practice in non anglo-saxon countries around the world. It is haunting for the kid and the family. At the current phase we are seeing him every two days which is just superb! Yesterday they allowed our daughter as well. 2. and 3. were supposed to be in the initial agreements about the outpatient individual program they were about to enroll with my son. Apparently this never happened as he got to the emergency unit.

I asked them if they were to apply CBT-ED or some form, or AFT but I got no answer. (as usual). Also in their desk I saw one/two books titled "Family Therapy" (in English) (looking more closely would get them upset and angry) but apparently they don't apply it in the hospitalization phase.
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greekdude
Mamaroo wrote:
What Torie said.

WR means weight restored. I have to add that the weight restored number changes with time. So my d weighed what she needed to weigh at age 11, that was when she was weight restored. But, she needed to gain several kgs per year as any normal child her age would do to remain WR. And, the amount of calories needed to gain the normal amount of weight is typically higher than for a non ED (eating disorder) child. They can stay in a hyper metabolic state for 6 months to 2 years (in our case) after WR and some has higher calorie needs for ever. Do not let any Dr tell you to give a 'normal' amount of calories at WR or that no more weight gain is necessary after WR. That is when relapses happen.


Your answer has so much value. Thank you so much. We will try to extrapolate his previous growth graph points to the present and the future. As you say by age the ideal weight of the child/teen increases as well. We have to take into account the height factor as well, if his height keeps going up, we will need even more calories in order to maintain/increase a good BMI value, or trying to approximate his ideal growth/weight chart.
Again your comment on metabolism and relapses was gold.
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Torie
Can someone please post a link to where greekdude can plot height/weight over time?  Is it mygrowthcharts. com?  Something like that. xx

-Torie
"We are angels of hope, of healing, and of light. Darkness flees from us." -YP 
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Enn
@Torie 
yes that website is the one.
When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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deenl
Hi greekdude,

And welcome. My son was almost 13 when he became ill. He is now 17 and is healthy and happy, although I still prepare his meals and we have always eaten as a family. Our son has needed and still needs the guiding hand of me or his dad with regards to eating. This is mostly because he has needed to consume much more than an average kid for the last 4 years. He has had to renourish a starving body, build up reserves again, repair the internal damage starvation causes and on top of that catch up on stunted growth and go through delayed puberty. All of which has required extra nutrition. I would imagine your son will be something similar. He will not come out of hospital with the ED (eating disorder) cured. In your shoes, I would read Eva's book and discuss plans with his mom (I am making an assumption that you guys have a relationship) I would also prepare some foods to put in the freezer. It will make the practicalities of life easier when he gets home. We can help you plan and give tips about how to get as much nutrition into any foods without increasing the amount your son will have to eat. I would also be discussing what the future holds with his hospital team. What supports will you be getting to ensure a smooth transition from eating in the hospital to eating at home? 

Please feel free to ask any questions you like.

Warm wishes,

D
2015 12yo son restricting but no body image issues, no fat phobia; lost weight IP! Oct 2015 home, stable but no progress. Medical hosp to kick start recovery Feb 2016. Slowly and cautiously gaining weight at home and seeing signs of our real kid.

May 2017 Hovering around WR. Mood great, mostly. Building up hour by hour at school after 18 months at home. Summer 2017 Happy, first trip away in years, food variety, begin socialising. Sept 2017, back to school FT first time in 2 years. [thumb] 2018 growing so fast hard to keep pace with weight
  • Swedish proverb: Love me when I least deserve it because that's when I need it most.
  • We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence Recovery, then, is not an act but a habit. Aristotle.
  • If the plan doesn't work, change the plan but never the goal.
  • We cannot control the wind but we can direct the sail.
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greekdude
@deenl Thank you. I will refer my wife to your post (btw we are together and will be together). Some ppl think that after he gets out off the hospital life will be like a happy garden, and I am the "anxious" guy who constantly reads and tries to get informed and connect with parents who are in the same boat (the social worker at the hospital accused me of having "semi-knowledgeable" traits, meaning that half knowledge is worse than ignorance, this is pretty common trait in Greece to protect ones' "field" of expertise by this way). So sorry for your son, but at the same time so glad that he/you have made it!  I have a question : so you followed the "path to independence" but still your son is dependent right? I know we have a long distance to reach the point you are now, just curious if there were any problems with the final phase.

About nutrition supplements, I tried to find "ensure" here but could not. He does not like those heavy-calorie milk (e.g. nutricia, etc) that they serve him in the hospital, so I am trying to find something that is taste/smell/color neutral and undetectable. So I found this :
https://www.nestlehealthscience.co.uk/vitaflo/conditions/nutrition%20support/disease%20related%20malnutrition/pro-cal-powder

I can source this from one pharmacy here. Is this any good?
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deenl
I don't know anything about that supplement. I use mostly a tasteless oil like rapeseed or sunflower oil in things like fruit smoothies, thick soups or yogurts. I add butter to pasta and rice (the kids inform me that Mediterranaen people will be scandalised. Don't kill me! If your son is used to olive oil in pasta etc, use that) and I am very generous with adding the olive oil to tomato, bolognaise sauces, etc. I fry much more than I used to. I also sometimes add some protein powder to foods.

In the early days we ordered Benecalorie from ebay in the US. It is quite expensive that way but gave me some comfort and peace. 

Please do encourage your wife to ask any questions, any doubts or concerns. When we first joined, my husband had some uncertainties that he posted here and we were able to figure things out.

greekdude wrote:
I have a question : so you followed the "path to independence" but still your son is dependent right? I know we have a long distance to reach the point you are now, just curious if there were any problems with the final phase.

We are in the transition phase at the moment so I'll let you know! I am in thinking and working things out in my head and I plan on doing a post on the forum with my musings in the next couple of weeks that might answer your questions in greater detail.

I have noticed a big difference between the healthcare systems in English speaking European countries who use (or at least have heard of) family led treatment like FBT and non English speaking ones (here in the Netherlands it is 'best left to the professionals') Personally, I think it should be a team effort by professionals and parents. It will be some time before we achieve that, I am afraid.

Warm wishes,

D
2015 12yo son restricting but no body image issues, no fat phobia; lost weight IP! Oct 2015 home, stable but no progress. Medical hosp to kick start recovery Feb 2016. Slowly and cautiously gaining weight at home and seeing signs of our real kid.

May 2017 Hovering around WR. Mood great, mostly. Building up hour by hour at school after 18 months at home. Summer 2017 Happy, first trip away in years, food variety, begin socialising. Sept 2017, back to school FT first time in 2 years. [thumb] 2018 growing so fast hard to keep pace with weight
  • Swedish proverb: Love me when I least deserve it because that's when I need it most.
  • We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence Recovery, then, is not an act but a habit. Aristotle.
  • If the plan doesn't work, change the plan but never the goal.
  • We cannot control the wind but we can direct the sail.
Quote
deenl
Just wondering how old your daughter is. This must be very unsettling for her too.
2015 12yo son restricting but no body image issues, no fat phobia; lost weight IP! Oct 2015 home, stable but no progress. Medical hosp to kick start recovery Feb 2016. Slowly and cautiously gaining weight at home and seeing signs of our real kid.

May 2017 Hovering around WR. Mood great, mostly. Building up hour by hour at school after 18 months at home. Summer 2017 Happy, first trip away in years, food variety, begin socialising. Sept 2017, back to school FT first time in 2 years. [thumb] 2018 growing so fast hard to keep pace with weight
  • Swedish proverb: Love me when I least deserve it because that's when I need it most.
  • We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence Recovery, then, is not an act but a habit. Aristotle.
  • If the plan doesn't work, change the plan but never the goal.
  • We cannot control the wind but we can direct the sail.
Quote
deenl
Just wondering if your wife understands English well. Eva's book is brilliant but it does cover absolutely everything and would be quite daunting to read if English was a second language, for example. When your Teen has an Eating Disorder by Lauren Muhlheim has the same philosophy but is a more straight forward book to read.

I have both and have learned from both books.

Warm wishes,

D
2015 12yo son restricting but no body image issues, no fat phobia; lost weight IP! Oct 2015 home, stable but no progress. Medical hosp to kick start recovery Feb 2016. Slowly and cautiously gaining weight at home and seeing signs of our real kid.

May 2017 Hovering around WR. Mood great, mostly. Building up hour by hour at school after 18 months at home. Summer 2017 Happy, first trip away in years, food variety, begin socialising. Sept 2017, back to school FT first time in 2 years. [thumb] 2018 growing so fast hard to keep pace with weight
  • Swedish proverb: Love me when I least deserve it because that's when I need it most.
  • We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence Recovery, then, is not an act but a habit. Aristotle.
  • If the plan doesn't work, change the plan but never the goal.
  • We cannot control the wind but we can direct the sail.
Quote
ValentinaGermania
greekdude wrote:
  I have a question : so you followed the "path to independence" but still your son is dependent right? I know we have a long distance to reach the point you are now, just curious if there were any problems with the final phase.


It is a long journey. You give them back some independecy very slow and need to learn how much they can stand. We are in year 3 now, my d is WR for 2 years and free of any symptoms at the moment but we still have a very strict safety net and in some cases she is still depended (at nearly age 20) but she now uses that to avoid a relapse herself and she would not see it as dependency but as "help". She asks for that help to avoid a relapse and like all loving parents here we give that help when we are asked.
Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
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Torie
greekdude wrote:
About nutrition supplements, I tried to find "ensure" here but could not. He does not like those heavy-calorie milk (e.g. nutricia, etc) that they serve him in the hospital, so I am trying to find something that is taste/smell/color neutral and undetectable. So I found this :
https://www.nestlehealthscience.co.uk/vitaflo/conditions/nutrition%20support/disease%20related%20malnutrition/pro-cal-powder

I can source this from one pharmacy here. Is this any good?


I am not familiar with that one, but in general, what matters most - by far - is getting in enough calories to increase weight 1 to 2 kg per week (or more).  I would ask the pharmacist if there's anything you should be aware of, but it seems worth a try.

I think your son will not "like" anything he thinks has a lot of calories.  Are they able to get him to drink it?  If he drinks it, that is good enough in my book.  Is he gaining weight? xx

-Torie
"We are angels of hope, of healing, and of light. Darkness flees from us." -YP 
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deenl
greekdude wrote:
He does not like those heavy-calorie milk (e.g. nutricia, etc)


How about throwing them in the blender with some frozen fruit to make a smoothie? 
2015 12yo son restricting but no body image issues, no fat phobia; lost weight IP! Oct 2015 home, stable but no progress. Medical hosp to kick start recovery Feb 2016. Slowly and cautiously gaining weight at home and seeing signs of our real kid.

May 2017 Hovering around WR. Mood great, mostly. Building up hour by hour at school after 18 months at home. Summer 2017 Happy, first trip away in years, food variety, begin socialising. Sept 2017, back to school FT first time in 2 years. [thumb] 2018 growing so fast hard to keep pace with weight
  • Swedish proverb: Love me when I least deserve it because that's when I need it most.
  • We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence Recovery, then, is not an act but a habit. Aristotle.
  • If the plan doesn't work, change the plan but never the goal.
  • We cannot control the wind but we can direct the sail.
Quote
greekdude
deenl wrote:
I don't know anything about that supplement. I use mostly a tasteless oil like rapeseed or sunflower oil in things like fruit smoothies, thick soups or yogurts. I add butter to pasta and rice (the kids inform me that Mediterranaen people will be scandalised. Don't kill me! If your son is used to olive oil in pasta etc, use that) and I am very generous with adding the olive oil to tomato, bolognaise sauces, etc. I fry much more than I used to. I also sometimes add some protein powder to foods.

In the early days we ordered Benecalorie from ebay in the US. It is quite expensive that way but gave me some comfort and peace. 

Hello, We will try all that for sure, we dont have this rapeseed handy I'll tell my wife to search for it. Well, more than half of Greece is not mediteranean at all, so although now "healthy" mediteranean "Cretan" diet is advertized everywhere like the golden standard, to be frank , we, the population from the mainland never had great love for olive oil and other med-oriented food. My mom always used corn-oil for cooking. Even more north (Makedonia) ppl use animal (pork) fat to cook, or to conserve meat during the winter. Greece is not only Santorini, Mykonos and Crete 🙂
I think this procal powder can function like benecalorie.

deenl wrote:

Please do encourage your wife to ask any questions, any doubts or concerns. When we first joined, my husband had some uncertainties that he posted here and we were able to figure things out.
We are in the transition phase at the moment so I'll let you know! I am in thinking and working things out in my head and I plan on doing a post on the forum with my musings in the next couple of weeks that might answer your questions in greater detail.

I have noticed a big difference between the healthcare systems in English speaking European countries who use (or at least have heard of) family led treatment like FBT and non English speaking ones (here in the Netherlands it is 'best left to the professionals') Personally, I think it should be a team effort by professionals and parents. It will be some time before we achieve that, I am afraid.

Warm wishes,
D


That's what I told her, to follow this thread. Please inform us about your final phase. Maybe Netherlands is closer to the germanic sphere? Did they allow you hospital visis from day one?
Today we saw him again. He was him self, and to be frank, many of the OCD he used to have now are fading. This is almost military life in there. I believe they are doing a great job. Maybe as some parents say here, when the kid cries in the hospital, it maybe the anorexia doing the crying part.
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greekdude
deenl wrote:
Just wondering how old your daughter is. This must be very unsettling for her too.


She is 16. They had a rather "turbulant" relationship last period before the hospital, but now she thinks of him all the time. They talk over the phone a lot. We try to calm her down. She visited him in the hospital and now we are working with all her aspects about this.
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greekdude
deenl wrote:
Just wondering if your wife understands English well. Eva's book is brilliant but it does cover absolutely everything and would be quite daunting to read if English was a second language, for example. When your Teen has an Eating Disorder by Lauren Muhlheim has the same philosophy but is a more straight forward book to read.

I have both and have learned from both books.

Warm wishes,

D


Hmm thanks I'll give it a shot as well. I haven't kept pace with Eva Musby's book as of late. Also I have two other books : "Help your teenager beat an eating disorder" by Lock and LeGrange, and also the book about Ben : "Please eat", as you understand I find books about boys more tempting!
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greekdude
tina72 wrote:


It is a long journey. You give them back some independecy very slow and need to learn how much they can stand. We are in year 3 now, my d is WR for 2 years and free of any symptoms at the moment but we still have a very strict safety net and in some cases she is still depended (at nearly age 20) but she now uses that to avoid a relapse herself and she would not see it as dependency but as "help". She asks for that help to avoid a relapse and like all loving parents here we give that help when we are asked.


So fear of relapse is still there... this is a very tricky illness 🙁
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greekdude
Torie wrote:


I am not familiar with that one, but in general, what matters most - by far - is getting in enough calories to increase weight 1 to 2 kg per week (or more).  I would ask the pharmacist if there's anything you should be aware of, but it seems worth a try.

I think your son will not "like" anything he thinks has a lot of calories.  Are they able to get him to drink it?  If he drinks it, that is good enough in my book.  Is he gaining weight? xx

-Torie


Yes he drinks it. Not very fond of it tho as he tells us. He says those milks are the trickiest part of the breakfast. Today as we saw him, his face was totally recovered, I never remembered him with a bulkier (for lack of better word) face than this. His arms are OK, but his belly, upper body and legs are still skinny. He surely has a long way to go. He does not miss any meals. Otherwise bye bye to mommy/daddy visits 🙂
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greekdude
deenl wrote:


How about throwing them in the blender with some frozen fruit to make a smoothie? 


My wife will try all that. Maybe the heavy artilery (mom in law) will join forces as soon as needed! She is a winderful woman and very knowledgable.
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