F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

Welcome to F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum. This is a free service provided for parents of those suffering from eating disorders. It is moderated by kind, experienced, parent caregivers trained to guide you in how to use the forum and how to find resources to help you support your family member. This forum is for parents of patients with all eating disorder diagnoses, all ages, around the world.

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mamabear Show full post »
debra18
Why isn't anyone working to change the manual? There are many things that seem like they need to be changed. How can we as parents do that?
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mamabear
Hey MNmom!!! I know you! 
My D and I got matching tattoos with the ED survivor symbol! ❤️
Persistent, consistent vigilance!
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Elibean1
Moving and uplifting posts ❣️ And I agree with that whole list the thread starts off with!

In London, with limited options for the next ‘phase’ (consolidation??) now my ARFID-with-AN-flavour 12 year old is eating steadily, well and above her weight curve, I’d love to have a similar list of sensible advice from you long-timers. Therapist? Just keep on feeding and watching? Tackle non-food fears?? 

This forum rum is just awesome. Thank you all x
Elibean
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mamabear
Elibean- there is a long period of time where we all feel like we are in a sort of ED purgatory limbo hell...the "stage" concept is absolutely NOT black and white and kids will move back and forth between them. Read my thread on stages and timelines.

Keep feeding, her growth and puberty will take a Ton of calories and fats. She should keep gaining weight into her 20s. Tackle ANY and all ED behaviors that still exist. I would say yes to tackling other fears. If you have a good therapist who can focus on helping her learn how to not resort to restriction etc during times of stress etc, how to handle those thoughts, whatever other issues you think need addressing- sure. 

Just do not back off too much too fast. baby steps. 
Persistent, consistent vigilance!
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Elibean1
Thank you Mamabear, that sounds exactly as I was beginning to realise - thanks to this and other forums. I’m thinking keep watching and feeding till mid-late teens, when we start hopefully to teach her how to take over some responsibility in preparation for young adulthood.

I guess, in a way, much like the rest of parenting a teen but much more consciously around food than usual! 

We we don’t have a long term good therapist yet (just weekly cahms with a psychologist who teaches her cbt techniques for anxiety....a start but I can see us needing something more later). I’m trying to find one.

She is scared of exams/tests, of running (throat trauma as infant), of people seeing her birthmark, of bugs, of flying...we can work on that. She’s never had fear foods as such. 

Its so reassuring to have people here to ask along the way. I’ll go check out your thread, thanks x
 
Elibean
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