F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

Welcome to F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum. This is a free service provided for parents of those suffering from eating disorders. It is moderated by kind, experienced, parent caregivers trained to guide you in how to use the forum and how to find resources to help you support your family member. This forum is for parents of patients with all eating disorder diagnoses, all ages, around the world.

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Leisya
my daughter who is 16 told me yesterday she has a eating problem.
tomorrow i will book an appointment with her pediatrician.
i join groups on Facebook and they recomend  me this site and gave me very good books and information.

im still in denial, but im also moving reading, learning searching how to help her, she is ok with getting help.

she do not know or is telling me what could be the reason she was always a very mature, inteligent and bright girl.

i think she is on the early stage as she has not lost a lot of weight, 
Im hoping to find a doctor in our hometown as money is really tight to travel but i will do all i can do to help her get thru this disease.
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scaredmom
Leisya, 
I welcome you to the forum I can understand how confusing this may be. I am glad she told you that she needs help. She will need a diagnosis first and then you will need to read up on it. You sound like you have a good plan in place to get her the help she needs. 
This forum is full of wonderful people and resources.
Please ask all the questions you have. 
XXX
When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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Mamaroo
Hi Leisya and welcome from me as well, and sorry you need to find yourself here. It is great that your d was able to tell you that she had a problem. 

You wrote: "she do not know or is telling me what could be the reason she was always a very mature, inteligent and bright girl."
To get an eating disorder you would need the right genetic make up. In 2017 the genes most likely associated with anorexia were found and they were closely related to auto immune disorders (type 1 diabetes) and schizophrenia (https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/28494655). In addition, to trigger the genetic predisposition you would need weight loss, which can be due to dieting, illness, operation, stomach bug, exercising, religious fasting or even travelling to new destinations with unfamiliar food. That is all you need. Good recovery programs do not focus on the cause of the eating disorder as it does not help with recovery. A good analogy is a broken arm, it does not matter how the arm got broken, but to recover the arm needs a cast. You are now going to be the cast for your d during recovery. She will need lots and lots of food to gain back her weight, "food is medicine" as they say here.

We are always here for any questions or support you need. Sending you lots of hugs!!!!!!!!!!
D became obsessed with exercise at age 9 and started eating 'healthy' at age 9.5. Restricting couple of months later. IP for 2 weeks at age 10. Slowly refed for months on Ensures alone, followed by swap over with food at a snails pace. WR after a year at age 11 in March 2017. View my recipes on my YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCKLW6A6sDO3ZDq8npNm8_ww
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tina72
Hi Leisya,

just wanted to add my welcome from Germany although I am sorry that you need to join us. It is great that you found us, you will get a lot of help here.
I just want to give you some hope, we are 2 years into it and started refeeding and FBT at age 17 and my d is 19 now and off to University and living a nearly ED free life (still working on last 10%). Recovery is possible, if you catch it early you will see great progress in the next weeks/months.
Get her to GP for health check and then seak for a FBT therapist in your region. Although it takes time and money I would suggest to search a professional licenced FBT therapist because it is better to drive a bit longer and get good help than to get bad help just around the corner.
If you can tell us where you are located we can probably help you with that.

Come here to vent and to ask your 1 million questions, we are open 24/7.
Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
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Leisya
Thank you, i wish i knew how to reply personally but im new to this forum, your comments mean a lot to me.
it give me hope.
Like mimi321 she started being vegetarian when she was 14, then she went vegan when she was 15 so that maybe tigger the issue.
at this point I don’t know what she has.
today we have a pediatrician appoiment and i have contact 2 counselors. Also i was able to contac a clinic 3 hrs from us.
we live in Laredo Texas. A small city border with Mexico.
its like you dont know what road to start.
i been praying and praying for guidence.

Again thank you.!  Its like hugs to me!
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Leisya
We went to see a counselor and took my daughter to eat.
i can see her anxious, nervous trying to choose a meal.
she choose quinoa.! 
I can see she is in pain being force to eat.
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Suzanne
Leisya,
I’m new-ish here, and have found great help and comfort from this amazing collection of warriors. Like you, my son told me that he thought he had an eating disorder. It’s a great sign.  For him, like having an addiction, there were/are only flashes of insight.... I’m told that gets better.  
He’s home from freshman year in college, 12 weeks into re-feeding, and making slow but good progress.  
Re your daughter not having lost a lot of weight yet: my son’s pediatrician egnored him drifting farther and farther away from his consistent  and healthy BMI for the past 2 years.  ( in my opinion) Pediatricians are so obsessed with the obisety problem and are terribly under educated about eating disorders.  Missed it!  If you can- Find a specialist in adolescent eating disorders.There may be a wait list... get on it.
Family Based Therapy is working.  
The book is very useful. ( muhlheim) 
past posts on this forum are very helpful
AND...
Please, please take care of yourself!  It’s emotionally one of the most difficult things I’ve ever experienced.
One meal at a time... read past posts when you can.  Post and reach out, ask questions. I’m telling you, this community is amazingly helpful. 

Love and light. 
Xoxo
suzanne 
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scaredmom
Leisya,
what type of counsellor was this?
Did you see the doctor? And what were their thoughts?
I do hope you were able to express your concerns that she may have an eating disorder.
Let us know how we may help.
XXX
When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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Leisya
Thank you all, the pediatrician visit was terrible.
he in front of her told us(after we explain the issue of the visit) ohhh she just lost 5 pounds.! That us not a lot.
i wanted to kill him.! Come on.!! We are here for ED and you say loosing 5 pounds its not a lot.
still he recoment therapy. 
(Glad i have you girls as you already advise me about this)
thank you for all the comments.
a question outside the topic.
how do i reply to someone especific.? I read the post from my phone.
i feel soo grateful with each one that has reply.
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scaredmom
You can reply to them here in your thread just as you are doing. I am not sure exactly if that is what you mean.
if you wish to quote them hit the quote button on the bottom right corner of their reply and it will quote in your reply box.
and then you can edit out what you don’t want.
hope that helps. Otherwise let one of the mods know and we can help.
XXX
When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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Mamaroo
We had the same experience with our doctor, it is very common, sadly. I hope you will be able to see a therapist soon. Eva Musby has a great website and here is a video from her as well:
https://anorexiafamily.com/

D became obsessed with exercise at age 9 and started eating 'healthy' at age 9.5. Restricting couple of months later. IP for 2 weeks at age 10. Slowly refed for months on Ensures alone, followed by swap over with food at a snails pace. WR after a year at age 11 in March 2017. View my recipes on my YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCKLW6A6sDO3ZDq8npNm8_ww
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tina72
Leisya wrote:
We went to see a counselor and took my daughter to eat.
i can see her anxious, nervous trying to choose a meal.
she choose quinoa.! 
I can see she is in pain being force to eat.


Let her not chose the food, that is too hard in that state.
You chose and she just has to eat it.

Ask for a counselor that is experienced with ED and offers Family based threatment (licenced!). That is not normal family therapy as your family is not the problem. Be careful - when the counselor says something about underlying issues and that your d must be in charge of what to eat and that she needs to want to get healthy - take your feet and RUN!

Better drive a bit more and get good help than bad help just around the corner...
Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
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tina72
These are licenced FBT therapists in Texas: If they are too far, ask for Skype-sessions.

TEXAS

Susan Cowden, MS, LMFT
262 Union Street
New Braunfels, Texas 78130
susancowden@gmail.com
http://www.susancowden.com

Susan Cowden is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist in private practice in New Braunfels.  Her primary interests are eating disorders, body-image issues, disordered eating and chronic dieting, depression and anxiety.  She sees adolescents and adults in her practice. She has attended the training offered by the FBT training institute at the University of Chicago (not yet certified).


Theresa Fassihi, PhD, PLLC

3730 Kirby Drive, Suite 925
Houston, Texas 77098
832-794-1280
terryfassihi@earthlink.net
Dr. Fassihi has ten years of experience treating eating disorders, in inpatient and outpatient settings. Dr. Fassihi is a licensed clinical psychologist and works with 
Family Based Therapy on an outpatient, private practice basis.  She works collaboratively with a multi-disciplinary treatment team that includes a dietitian, internist and psychiatrist.   As treatment progresses, other treatment modalities including  Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Dialectical Behavior Therapy and other Evidence-Based Practices are utilized for continued support, as necessary. “I believe it is important to include the family in treatment so that they can be supportive of the individual’s recovery, whenever possible.”

Allison K. Chase, Ph.D.
Clinical Psychologist
2525 Wallingwood Drive, Building 7, Suite 7D
Austin, TX 78746
PH 512.347.9992
email: info@drallisonchase.com

Karyn D. Hall, Ph.D.
Dialectical Behavior Therapy Center
820 Gessner, Suite 750
Houston, TX 77024
713-973-2800
713-973-0104 Fax
http://www.karynhallphd.com

Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
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scaredmom
Hi Leisya,
You and your d have been on my mind. Hope  things are moving in a positive direction.
XXX
When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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