F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

Welcome to F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum. This is a free service provided for parents of those suffering from eating disorders. It is moderated by kind, experienced, parent caregivers trained to guide you in how to use the forum and how to find resources to help you support your family member. This forum is for parents of patients with all eating disorder diagnoses, all ages, around the world.

Join these conversations already in progress:
• Road To Recovery - Stories of Hope
• Events for Parents and Caregivers Around the World
• Free F.E.A.S.T Conference Videos

Visit the F.E.A.S.T website for information and support.

If you need help using the forum please reach out to one of the moderators (listed below), or email us at bronwen@feast-ed.org.

Hope2019 Show full post »
tina72
Hope2019 wrote:
Hi, Tina72,
 I am gong to buy new snacks and hide the labels, tell him how many is one serving each item, I am not sure how it goes...


Just give him the snack or let him chose between 2 items that are presented without labels and tell him "that is the right amount for your snack, I know what you need, you just need to chose". Keep us updated how it works. It is a change but it is needed to get him from counting. No information, no counting possible.

Hope2019 wrote:
also my s takes ensure plus a lot this week after we stop negation (removing small amount food), I am looking for your ideas for sneak more calories in the ensure plus bottle?  my H is going to use glue to re-glue the bottle after adding, I tried cheese and butter, they do not go with ensure drink, I could only add the rest of space of the bottle, maybe 10ml-20 ml, I am thinking to add more ensure drink if I can not find anything more dense that it.


I do not know if the glue will work but I am sure many parents are interested in that 😉
Can you add cream or Benecalorie to the ensure plus?
I would prefer to get rid of all ensure. Think about closing them away and tell him you are out and he needs to take a milkshake instead or a fruit smoothie (that you prepared before with "specials"). It is not normal to drink so much ensure, it is AN behaviour and this has to stop.
Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
Quote
Hope2019
Hi, tina,

  I really feel like you are just sitting next to me, anytime when I need help, you are there, I feel warm and touched ...

  I will your tips for the snack, and I think Benecalorie is a great idea to add into ensure plus, will keep you updated....

  I am scared to close the ensure plus now, we just let him to switch from cliff bar to ensure plus last week with couple of horrible times, because we saw him was very comfortable eating cliff bar, he hated boost or ensure plus before, but this week, he really liked it after we bought his favorite strawberry flavor, maybe another mistake we made...
 
  Do you think we should let him stay ensure plus for few weeks than close it out? I really want to him gain another 4-5 lb in 1-2 months, maybe after I pushed his weight to that level than close the ensure plus?



tina72 wrote:


Just give him the snack or let him chose between 2 items that are presented without labels and tell him "that is the right amount for your snack, I know what you need, you just need to chose". Keep us updated how it works. It is a change but it is needed to get him from counting. No information, no counting possible.

tina72 wrote:


I do not know if the glue will work but I am sure many parents are interested in that 😉
Can you add cream or Benecalorie to the ensure plus?
I would prefer to get rid of all ensure. Think about closing them away and tell him you are out and he needs to take a milkshake instead or a fruit smoothie (that you prepared before with "specials"). It is not normal to drink so much ensure, it is AN behaviour and this has to stop.
12 years son, diagnosed AN 03/18, ip one week, residential 5 weeks, IOP 7 weeks, doing FBT since 11/18.
Quote
alfalfa
It sounds like his eating disorder prefers the ensure because it feels safe—he knows exactly how many calories are in it and can calculate when it’s less than the food offered. If you want him off the ensures, you have to take away that safety. Perhaps try changing it so that he has to drink 2.5 or 3 per missed meal, or serving slightly varying amounts in different glasses so he loses the ability to precisely count calories.

Another option would be to replace the ensure with homemade strawberry smoothies made in advance away from watchful eyes. You could tell him something like the store bought ones are getting very expensive but you’ve researched how to make them so they have just what he needs.
Quote
tina72
Hope2019 wrote:
Hi, tina,
I really feel like you are just sitting next to me, anytime when I need help, you are there, I feel warm and touched ...


That is what we are here for. I would love to be able to sit next to you.
 
Hope2019 wrote:
Do you think we should let him stay ensure plus for few weeks than close it out? I really want to him gain another 4-5 lb in 1-2 months, maybe after I pushed his weight to that level than close the ensure plus?


You need to decide what is more important at the moment - weight gain or getting rid of the ensures and counting. There is not one right answer to that. You know him best. If you think you need the ensure for weight gain, stick to it for some weeks and then try it again. It is just important to know that you HAVE TO tackle this. And normally it is better to do it sooner than later because it does not get easier the longer he is used to it.
Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
Quote
Foodsupport_AUS
Realistically getting the weight on is much more important than getting rid of the Ensures. What I would recommend however is pouring however many Ensures YOU think replaces the meal into a glass. Preferably a different style /shape glass every time. He is definitely using it as a security but at the same time unless you can get bigger meals in or more Ensures in you are not going to get the gain that you need. Tell him before hand that you are no longer giving him Ensures in a pack.
D diagnosed restrictive AN June 2010 age 13.5. Weight restored July 2012. Relapse and now clawing our way back. Treatment: multiple hospitalisations and individual and family therapy.
Quote
Hope2019
Thanks for all great thoughts and love, I will keep it for a few weeks and get a plan.
even we are far away but the feel like you guys are holding my hands for every step, big hugs and best wish to all of us

Realistically getting the weight on is much more important than getting rid of the Ensures. What I would recommend however is pouring however many Ensures YOU think replaces the meal into a glass. Preferably a different style /shape glass every time. He is definitely using it as a security but at the same time unless you can get bigger meals in or more Ensures in you are not going to get the gain that you need. Tell him before hand that you are no longer giving him Ensures in a pack.
12 years son, diagnosed AN 03/18, ip one week, residential 5 weeks, IOP 7 weeks, doing FBT since 11/18.
Quote

        

WTadmin