F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

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clem
Hi!

I posted some time ago (Sept 2017), just before my d14 ended up in hospital for 9 days, due to compulsive exercise and starving herself. It's been a real whirlwind journey since then. I have followed this amazing forum and the extremely caring conversations and responses. it's been very emotional too and have not been able to get the courage to reach out. I have also been trying to educate myself and find sound help. We do struggle with the CAMHS service here. Our GP is our only current advocate, although I do have a nutritionist coming on board and a consultant (but it's mhs and it's a waiting game).

My d14 was doing really well, she was maintaining her 52.2kg weight with 1400calories. 6 months later she is on around 1000 - 1050 calories a day and at a weight of 44.5 - 44.7, which is too low, I know this. It's a real struggle though. She is 5'8".

I recent weeks and especially days D has been feeling light headed, dizzy and very unwell with nausea (acid reflux) , I also understand this is due to a lack oxygen in her body/brain etc...

My question is.... her weight went from 44.7 to 44.9 and today 45.1, yet she decreased her calories over these days from 1040 to 1000, why is she gaining weight? It is too frightening her to the point that she really can't cope, the anger is very strong too.

Her bowel movements have been consistently, the same time everyday, but for the last couple days it's been hard to go and today, nothing. Am I right in thinking her metabolism is slowing down, therefore there could be water retention and constipation, which may appear as weight gain, but are of course temporary.... it seems like her body is trying every possible way to conserve energy and I fear she is in starvation mode.

Either way, she is clearly reducing her calories every day at the moment reacting, because she cannot cope with any jump in weight, if it would stay the same or go up very slowly, it would be so much better for her to deal with, but this is really beyond what she can cope with.

D has been allowed to weigh and prep meals on advice of GP and consultant (back in Sept 2017). I do supervise, but she does well with this and enjoys it.

Any advice welcome.

D15, Restrictive AN. 5' 8" and 51kg. Diagnosed and hospitalised in Sept 2017 for 9 days. At home since in recovery/relapse/recovery. In the trenches and tackling FBT. Not a vegan anymore!
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Kali
Hi Clem

Welcome.
I'm sorry you have been let down by your team and you and your daughter given advice which is clearly not working.

Quote:
D has been allowed to weigh and prep meals on advice of GP and consultant (back in Sept 2017). I do supervise, but she does well with this and enjoys it. 


A food typical, non ED child of 14 would usually not be weighing and prepping meals. (At least mine did not) Many parents have found that they need to do the cooking and meal prep and that the only job of the child is to eat the food. Since this is clearly not working for her, it might be time to make a change. For example, you become responsible for all the cooking and portioning her food and she is only responsible for eating it.

If your daughter is losing weight and not maintaining the weight that she should then she is not doing well with this arrangement. I'm sure she enjoys it because it allows her to eat less than she is supposed to, and help keeps her weight down.

She will need to be brought up to a much higher level of caloric intake and most likely will not be able to do it herself. How can you get her up to say, 3000 calories a day? 

Kali




Food=Love
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Enn
Dear Clem,
I am so glad you reached out. It sounds very difficult. Your D is still quite young and is quite underweight as you are aware. Have you read about "magic plate" here on the forum.I am disappointed in your doctor to let your D manage her meals.My 19 yo non ED D still does not do that on her own and hardly ever. I am the mom and in charge of nutrition and teaching them to cook only when I feel they can handle it. 
I know she may enjoy the meal prep, but is that ED? 
We had issues too if she thought she would gain weight. We did not allow her to see her weight at all and just said " you are doing fine" no matter what was on the scale. Now my D was 11 at the start of this.
 It is my opinion only , that your D has huge ED thoughts, ED has had too much control. I am not sure if you are able to just feed her and cook for her and give no choice. One analogy I find here often that makes things crystal clear is "If she had cancer, does she decide when and what chemo she gets?"
Regarding the nutritionist, we did not use one, we just said we will keep increasing calories every few days to allow for god weight gain and we got to 4500-5000 max per day and now at almost 13 we are still at 4000 or so. Look up high calorie threads here. 

That mindset helped me push the calories ++. I found with proper nutrition, and ever 7 kg above target weight (her first target as she is growing) her mind got better, less fights after three months and good weight gain. Now she is doing great.

I am so sorry that you need to be here. We are all her to support you
Warmly
scaredmom
 
When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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clem
I agree Kali,

Something needs to change. When she does feel unwell, I do prepare her meals, so there is trust there. I do agree that she clearly needs to be on more calories a day, but we need help to do this.

My partner of 9 years (not her Dad) has not been supportive and not a nice person at all. He is in the process of moving out, which is good overall, but added stress at the moment.

Weirdly enough, D researching (vegan), weighing, prepping her own food it is the only thing that keeps her eating and enjoying what she is eating. When I was doing this myself after the hospital episode, food became fearful and just a mechanical process, she really struggled and began to decline. The hospital ED consultant (I got to phone him a few times) and GP suggested lettering d take some control with my supervision.

When her weight increases by more than 100g, she panics and reduces calories... this can be through hiding food, or secret exercise (she is working hard to reduce this, but I know it's a struggles and I have to keep an eagle eye - and find the time to work!)

We are in an awful stinky cycle, I don't think I can do this by myself, without some proper support. It does not make it easy that D14 does not want to engage with anyone!

She's not far off from the GP suggestion of a unit...... this is the last thing d wants, but is obviously struggling to fight AN.

I really do feel that I am doing the wrong thing as a Mum by allowing her to weigh/prep food...... it's not going to be as simple as me take over. Blaaaaaaaaaaah!
D15, Restrictive AN. 5' 8" and 51kg. Diagnosed and hospitalised in Sept 2017 for 9 days. At home since in recovery/relapse/recovery. In the trenches and tackling FBT. Not a vegan anymore!
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Foodsupport_AUS
Sorry that things seem to be going from bad to worse with your daughter and that you feel so badly let down by your team. Have you gone back to CAMHS as mentioned in September posts, or have you just been struggling along on your own? 

Trying to answer the myriad of questions about bowel movements, and weight and caloric input is a hopeless task. Reassuring anxiety only gives that anxiety more to hang onto. Distraction and acknowledgement of her distress are the best ways forward. There is also no easy way to gain weight with AN. It is hard work and distressing every day. Taking it slowly has never been shown to work better than making it go fast. 

A few other questions - is your GP continuing to monitor her weight and vitals - postural blood pressure and pulse etc.? With that continued weight loss your D may be becoming medically unstable and may need hospitalisation. 

Have you read these books /handouts? http://ceed.org.au/sites/default/files/resources/documents/FamilyLedRefeedingRecoveryResourcePartA_Nov_2017.pdf  and http://ceed.org.au/sites/default/files/resources/documents/FamilyLedRefeedingRecoveryResourcePartB_Nov_2017..pdf
D diagnosed restrictive AN June 2010 age 13. Mostly recovered 10 years later.  Treatment: multiple hospitalisations and individual and family therapy.
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clem
"Reassuring anxiety only gives that anxiety more to hang onto" - OMG, You are so right.

It's just been myself, D and blooming AN since Sept 2107.

D does go to the GP on a regular basis for weight, BP and blood tests (clear at present), she hates going, but at least will engage.

A. It's clear D should not be prepping her own food.
B. I should not be weighing her at home.

To change this is NOT going to be easy and I am going to have to insist CAMHS provide better support in addition (have actually been trying to do this), but will push more.

Thanks, I'll read on the docs you mention

and thanks also scaredmom, I take on board what you say too!

There is a lot of OCD, and very rigid behavior, especially when it comes to anything to do with food and calories, fat etc......

Thanks lovely people, this is extremely lonely and hellish isn't it!

D15, Restrictive AN. 5' 8" and 51kg. Diagnosed and hospitalised in Sept 2017 for 9 days. At home since in recovery/relapse/recovery. In the trenches and tackling FBT. Not a vegan anymore!
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sk8r31
Just sending a quick message to say hang in there!  This is the toughest of illnesses to manage, and with little to no good support it is even more so!

Be a squeaky wheel with your CAMHS team....you need whatever support you can tap into.  Sometimes meal support can be offered, and if so, this may be of benefit.

Weighing at the GP, and perhaps blind weights to start, would be a good move.

Do you have any other family that may be able to help with meal prep or supervision?  Your own mental health is very important as well.  Good self-care can help you manage for the long haul.  

Eva Musby has some very good videos on how to manage meal times and the distress that your d is feeling.  She also has a good meditation video that can help calm you before and after meals.  Here is a link to an article she has written that you may find helpful, and which has a couple of those videos embedded.

Sending warm support,
sk8r31
It is good to not only hope to be successful, but to expect it and accept it--Maya Angelou
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clem
Thanks so much,

One of the main issues today is that D has not had her usual daily bowel movement, this has completely freaked her out because it increased her weight this morning. Reason and rationale is not working with her at all. but, she is still eating thank goodness.

Her bowel movements are generally once a day and in the morning, with AN induced OCD, simply not having one is not acceptable to her, the anger is palpable, today is not a good day!

I actually have no idea why she has not had a bowel movement, but she has complained it's a little hard to go recently. With the nausea and feeling very low in energy, I think her metabolism is struggling and slowing down a bit, which might effect bowel movements?

I just don't know how to get from one day to the next at the moment.

Thanks so much for all the suggestions so far!

x

D eats 3 meals a day and is very happy to be doing this, I am with her, but she happily eats and watches a video etc... I know the 1040 ish calories are not enough and we need to address this urgently, but what do I do with

D15, Restrictive AN. 5' 8" and 51kg. Diagnosed and hospitalised in Sept 2017 for 9 days. At home since in recovery/relapse/recovery. In the trenches and tackling FBT. Not a vegan anymore!
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sk8r31
An ED can really affect gut motility and for quite some time.  The only way to move forward and to normalize is for your d to keep eating and drinking.

Acknowledge her distress, but don't try to rationalize.  

Sometimes you just have to take life a minute at a time.  You and your d WILL get through this.  Do whatever you can to take care of yourself, so you can manage for the long haul.

Sending warm support,
sk8r31
It is good to not only hope to be successful, but to expect it and accept it--Maya Angelou
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clem
Thank you sk8r31

Yes, I am on the rickety wooden rollercoaster that never seems to end, naked and in a sand storm, with intermittent giant hail and zombies at my feet and it's pitch black! I think that about sums it up!

I really do appreciate all of your support, it's really the first I have had and where others are on the same page and understand the depths of AN.

Biiiiiiiig hugs.
D15, Restrictive AN. 5' 8" and 51kg. Diagnosed and hospitalised in Sept 2017 for 9 days. At home since in recovery/relapse/recovery. In the trenches and tackling FBT. Not a vegan anymore!
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sk8r31
Clem, you have a wonderful sense of humour, which goes an awfully long way to help shore up the spirits and give yourself the strength to get through.  

Love the images you provided....the ED journey is truly like no other.

Sending warm support,
sk8r31
It is good to not only hope to be successful, but to expect it and accept it--Maya Angelou
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ValentinaGermania
Hi clem,
the problem is that you are afraid of fighting ED. We all were afraid of starting to take control of food prep and intake, but you must do this. She will not like it, she will scream and cry and throw things at you but you must insist that she eats. It is very hard for the first days so maybe you can get some help from friends or family?
We thought we cannot do this, too, our d was 17 at the start. We waited and waited until she had to go to hospital and was in real danger. Then we tried to do magic plate and it worked from the first day. It was not easy and her reaction was very frightened but she ate everything we put in front of her from the first day. Everything with Eva Musbys book in our hand...[wink]

Her calory intake is way too low and you know that. She cannot stay vegan, it is impossible to get enough calcium and fat into her with that. You can try vegetarian but if she ate meat before AN she should be able to do that again. A great variety in food has the best outcome.

She should not know her weight, get her blind weighed if possible and no scale at home. If she knows her weight she will always try to restrict something after gaining 50 g. She will need to gain a lot more and that is not negotiable.

Where are you? Can we help you find a FBT therapist in your region if CAMSH is no help?
Can you think about contacting Eva Musby? She is doing skype sessions to help parents to get started.
Do you know her videos?

Don´t be afraid. You can do that. You are not alone. We all went through this and we can help you find a way to make it work.

Tina72
Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
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ValentinaGermania
"I actually have no idea why she has not had a bowel movement, but she has complained it's a little hard to go recently."
With that low calory intake everything she eats is used by the body to simply work and there is nothing left for digestion.
She will not have anything to put out with 1000 calories a day.

"I just don't know how to get from one day to the next at the moment."
That is totally normal, try to get one day after the other, sometimes one meal after the other. 3 meals and 3 snacks. For example 2000 calories for the start and then encreasing 300 each second day until you see wait gain. Try to have small amounts of food with high calories inside. You can add cream and oil to nearly everything, including yoghurt, applesauce, smoothies (they are great because they look "healthy")...

Ask direct questions so that we can give you more ideas.
Tina72
Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
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clem
Thanks Tina72.

We live in Lincoln, UK.

We also just got back from the 'out of hours' GP. What a bloody epic failure that was. D has not been out the house in a couple weeks, so this was too much for her, just to go in the car (it did not fit in with her daily rigid routines and although she really did try, it was too much in the end).

The out of hours service is in a hospital 40 minutes drive, when we got there a lot of 'hospital' triggers occurred, D just wanted to leave. We had to wait for 30 minutes and When D saw the GP, she couldn't handle it and bolted for the door. She was immediately expecting something for the constipation (because that is all that is on her mind and the perceived weight gain), she was also unfamiliar and scared of the GP. I let her wait in the car for a few minutes, but the GP said he was very concerned for her, especially her state of mind and that needed tackling. He recommended that I look out of our County... great suggestion, but where? who?

So we are home, she had a panic attack on the way home too (not had one of those for a very long time).

I know a stool loosener is not the key here, she needs to be having more calories at the end of the day, but what on earth do I do in the short term? Let her have a mild herbal Senokot laxative to help the passages? or wait until tomorrow and take her back to our local GP...!

I know I need to get her on more calories, but I do not even know what we should be aiming for WR wise....... we have no target. I am seeing a nutritionist in a week.... that is going to take too long and I feel like we are running out of time.

D was doing so well a few weeks back, but is slipping!

D15, Restrictive AN. 5' 8" and 51kg. Diagnosed and hospitalised in Sept 2017 for 9 days. At home since in recovery/relapse/recovery. In the trenches and tackling FBT. Not a vegan anymore!
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Kali
Hi Clem,

From the numbers you have given and your description of how today went, I feel really concerned about your daughter's weight and state of mind, and would definitely take the GP's advice:

Quote:
the GP said he was very concerned for her... He recommended that I look out of our County... great suggestion, but where? who?


Can you follow up on this and find out where to look and who to speak with?
Also taking her into her regular GP tomorrow as you mention, is not a bad idea and perhaps you can ask these questions there tomorrow and set something in motion?

As far as the constipation goes, you could serve her more foods which are known to relieve constipation. You could let her know that if she eats and drinks more she will not be constipated so that you are going to help her by serving 3 meals and 2 snacks a day. Drinking more fluids will also help with the constipation so try to have her drink significantly more than she is now. You could give her some prune juice and apple or pear juices as well. Other foods that can help with constipation are dried fruits, raisins, figs, ripe bananas, apples and applesauce and foods with fiber, such as oatmeal. I would steer clear of laxatives since I'm going to guess that you don't want to support something which people with eating disorders sometimes abuse: laxatives. And maybe a glass of warm, full fat milk with some coffee added in the morning would also help.

As far as a target weight, do you have any weight and height charts from her visits to the GP? I know that is not done in all countries. If not, a very loosy goosy rule of thumb would be 5lbs above 100 lbs for every inch above 5 feet. So for example if your daughter is 5'8" that would mean you would be aiming for somewhere around 64 kg, and really no less than working up incrementally to somewhere around 3-4000 calories a day for refeeding.

Kali
Food=Love
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mid73
Hi
When my daughter was inpatient at a UK Ed unit, nearly all the patients were constipated and had lactulose or laxido/ Movicol sachets to keep stools soft. They are usually a better bet for regular use than senna. The unit also made sure that they drank 200ml with every meal and snacks were usually a2-300ml smoothie/ hot chocolate. Smoothies were 30g frozen red fruits( thawed for a bit with a couple of teaspoons of sugar), 150ml full milk, 3 tbsp full fat strawberry yoghurt ( eg onken) and 1 tbsp double cream. I think that made about 300 calories. As a start I would try to get to 3000 cals a day as a start, increasing as necessary, 700 for every meal and 3x300 snacks as a rough guide.
Raisins and sultanas are surprisingly calorific and keep bowels going too.

Good luck
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ValentinaGermania
Hi clem,
so sorry that your GP visit was that bad today.
Constipation is not nice, but not life threatening if it is only for a few days. In the early days my d was only able to have bowel movement once a week. I would also not try laxatives, because it will dry her out very soon. Can you offer her an enema?

Target weight was a big question for us, too, because we did not have historical growth and weight chart. Do you have some? If you have only growth chart: if she was on 70th percentile for growth, she need to be on that percentile for weight for example. If you have none, try to look at BMI for first information (not set too low, about 20 for first target) and then you need to make her gain slowly more weight until you see some change in behaviour. In many cases there is a weight range when they get better and behave normal again. It is not only weight, it is time also. It takes about 6-12 months after WR to see the brain recovery.

Until you see the nutritionist (hope he/she will help) I would try to get into her as much as possible. Add butter, cream and oil to everything fluid. You can hide butter in mashed potatoes, cream in scrambled eggs and oil in smoothies or yoghurt or apple sauce. They need a lot of fat to recover, about 100 g a day.

Tina72
Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
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clem
Thank you so much.

I feel that I need to start again, but I just don't know how to exceed 1000 calories a day right now... when she was admitted into hospital Sept 2017, we got her from pretty much 0 cal a day to 1400 and she maintained this and her 52.2kg weight for a couple months, but started to slide. D has also been a vegan for 1.5 years, I don't know how to change that overnight.

I weigh D in the morning, have been doing for 5 months now (she gets blind weighed at GP every couple weeks on average), if she ever dipped below a certain weight, she has made efforts to increase calories and bump up the weight (which is positive right?). This was working OK, but not always. Her bowels stopped moving a couple days ago (along with nausea,fatigue etc), her weight went up 600g in 48 hours, It has been to much for her to handle.

D currently eats 3 meals a day. 300+ cal per meal and consumes around 1L of fluids, as well as frozen lollipops. It all comes to approx 10000 - 1030 calories. She is also vegan (I know it's not ideal).

1. I need to get rid of the scales
2. I need to slowly introduce more calories and take over more meal preps (she does breakfast, I do dinner and we share lunch).
3. I need to get her at least into a vegetarian state???
4. I really need to help her address her emotional state, it's desperate and spiraling.

How in the name of sweet love do I do all this and by myself? I do need to go to work a couple days a week (my partner is a drip and soon to be ex partner)..... I have Eva Mausby's book and a couple others, plus all of the solid advice from you guys..... it's just putting this into action. I need help!

I will take D to local GP tomorrow and get advice on pooability, as well as possible assistance from outside the county. I need a trained buddy helping me.

Local CAMHS really messed D up last time, so she refused to ever go into their building again, but is willing to see someone new (not the 2 people we saw before). I received a long overdue letter from them yesterday, that she has been invited to attend a session in 'the building' and with the same 2 people! Sigh....

It's time for a glass of wine.
D15, Restrictive AN. 5' 8" and 51kg. Diagnosed and hospitalised in Sept 2017 for 9 days. At home since in recovery/relapse/recovery. In the trenches and tackling FBT. Not a vegan anymore!
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Enn

You sound in control! I think your plan is a great great start!
Doing it all by yourself will be hard. I wonder if when you get to and ED specialist team if there may be a mentor of sorts? Others here may know about that.  

Can you call the CAMHs and tell them that you request other people? You have a solid right to do that. And any professional should understand that. I know in my field, if you wish a different person handling your concerns, we do that easily. 
Are you allowed to take leave from work for a while due to your situation? Would a doctor write a note that you need to help a sick child? Here in Canada we do have that type of leave. 

I wish I had the magic answer for you. But you sound so good today!
Enjoy your wine!
Keep strong!

When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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Kali

Hi Clem,

Well, after you drink your wine here are a few things to think over:

Your daughter is 14 and she is not in charge. You are.
I would suggest that you stop weighing her at home and have her blind weighed at the dr. once a week or so. Hide the scale where she cannot find it.

I hope you don't think that I am presumptuous but I refed on a vegetarian diet and here is some sample menus of meals we prepared. The veganism needs to stop, since she will not be able to eat enough fats to help her brain heal. It is also better if she starts eating fish again, since fish has some oils which also are beneficial to brains.

breakfast:
smoothie: whole milk, full fat yoghurt, a dash of vanilla, some ground almonds, a banana, some strawberries, a few tablespoons of honey and a few ice cubes. Blend.
oatmeal: cook oatmeal in water but then add heavy cream, butter, nuts, raisins and brown sugar.
or
eggs: scrambled with cheddar cheese/homefried potatoes with butter/oil.
or:
croissant with cheddar cheese
fruit salad

lunches:
vegetable quiche with spinach or asparagus. Saute veggies, add full fat plain yoghurt, some full fat milk, grated cheddar cheese, 4 eggs in store bought pie dough, and bake for 35 minutes.
Serve with juice.
Add dessert: strawberries with heavy cream and sugar on top.

Tuna and mayonnaise, with celery, onion and carrots chopped up and put in the tuna on good bread with potato chips on the side.
Juice
dessert: cookies

Caprese sandwich, fresh mozarella, sundried tomato and fresh basil on good hero roll with olive oil and balsamic vinegar drizzled on it. Sliced Avocado and sliced cherry tomatoes with salad dressing to accompany it.
Juice
dessert: cookies

Grilled cheese sandwich with tortilla chips on the side.
grapes for dessert
Juice

Dinners:
Salmon baked with butter.
Asparagus roasted in the oven with olive oil and grated parmesan cheese.
Rice with benecalorie
Dessert: slice of fruit pie

Tacos
beans, rice, sour cream, avocado, grated cheese and salsa
Juice
dessert: pudding

Stir Fry:
Assortment of veggies stir fried in olive oil. Add cashew nuts and sprinkle some sesame oil on it at the end of cooking.
Cook rice then add benecalorie for added calories.
Juice
dessert: lemon bars

Ravioli: buy the highest calorie ravioli you can find and then serve it with pesto. (basil pine nuts and olive oil and you can add benecalorie to the pesto also)

Macaroni and Cheese: cook macaroni and then mix with lots of cheese and heavy cream. Sometimes it tastes good if you use a few different cheeses. Cheddar and smoked gouda together for example. Bake. Top with some breadcrumbs sauteed in butter 15 minutes before taking it out of the oven.

Soups: I made a corn and potato soup with heavy cream and milk to which I added benecalorie, and served with bread and butter.

Chili: beans, smartground, canned tomatoes, chili spices. Serve on rice. Top with sour cream and grated cheddar cheese. Benecalorie can be added to this also.

snacks: granola bars
yoghurt
cookies
chips and salsa
hot chocolate

Go out to the store and buy all sorts of snacky foods and leave them in a prominent place around the kitchen. Chips, cookies, all the sort of things your d. probably won't eat right now. Serve some of them for desserts. What happened was that as we went on, my d. went from not wanting to eat any of those things but then started to help herself to some of these things. Also it is very important to not have any diet foods in the house. Full fat milk, no lo calorie anything, etc. Also make the transition from water to juice and insist that she drink a caloric drink with every meal. Take up the fight if necessary. 

Be really firm yet kind and compassionate. You are in charge. Start cooking up a storm and serving it. Redirect any talk of calories or weight with her. I had my d. take multivitamins and super vitamin b also, since there are b vitamins which are in meat which you don't get as a vegetarian.

You can do it. Your daughter needs you to help her whether she likes it or not.

warmly,

Kali


 

Food=Love
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clem
Thanks Scaredmom and Kali,

I really do appreciate your comments and suggestions and take everything on board. As well as taking D to our local GP tomorrow, I will ask about and look into help outside our county. Will also call CAMHS first thing and request (again, they must have wax in their ears) a new ed specialist.

Thanks for the veg menus too! I am going to get her onto at least a veg diet, but even if that takes a bit of time, will focus on upping calories first off. She eats tofu, all veg, beans, pulses, oatmeal, jello, soya yogurt, pasta, loves beans/pulses soup etc.... and is on supplements since Sept 2017 as advised by hospital and GP. D drinks water, squash, zero cal dr pepper, herbal teas, decaf coffee, and just mugs of hot water sometimes, also almond milk on occasion. It's not too bad a vegan diet and there is plenty to up the calories with for now.

My work has been great. I took Sept to Dec off on sick leave and only working a couple days a week since Jan, but I feel I need to take more off if I can. I know it's not ideal and is impacting on my job roles (I am a university lecturer), but as long as I can keep my job, I'll be fine and play catch up later.

Thanks for the tip on displaying snacky foods. I do this freely. She inspects everything, even smells longingly some homemade or old favorite stuff, but not ready to take the next step. It will come.
D15, Restrictive AN. 5' 8" and 51kg. Diagnosed and hospitalised in Sept 2017 for 9 days. At home since in recovery/relapse/recovery. In the trenches and tackling FBT. Not a vegan anymore!
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