F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

Welcome to F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum. This is a free service provided for parents of those suffering from eating disorders. It is moderated by kind, experienced, parent caregivers trained to guide you in how to use the forum and how to find resources to help you support your family member. This forum is for parents of patients with all eating disorder diagnoses, all ages, around the world.

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EC_Mom
I haven't posted in a long time. My d is 4 years past refeeding, healthy, curvy, NORMAL, going to college in fall. For those of you in the trenches, don't lose hope. The illness made her say and do such awful things, and after gaining weight--more than the doctors said was necessary--she got back to normal. She is loving and close to me, which I would never have believed possible in the bad old days.

A question: Did your kid do better with refeeding while watching upsetting TV shows? My d, who at the time (and now still) normally was NOT a fan of murder mysteries, violent shows, etc., did weirdly better with eating while watching "Criminal Minds" (cops going after serial killers)! And I just was talking to a mom in refeeding stage, who said her d does better while watching horrific stuff (e.g. Holocaust-related movies), and that watching funny, happy shows makes this mom's d more upset.

I'm wondering if this is a thing. I could imagine that there might be some weird brain thing in which watching painful stuff sort of assuages the ED cruel voice, making eating a bit less difficult. ED made my d do all kinds of things she didn't enjoy, like not changing clothes or showering, isolating from friends. Could it be that TV with distressing content could weirdly gratify ED enough to quiet the punishing anti-eating voice??
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melstevUK
Hi EC_mom,

I am glad your d is doing so well .That is great news. 
Your comment is interesting and worth exploring, I think. If watching horrific and violent programmes makes refeeding easier, I am all for it. Given that you know of someone else doing this, I think there is something in what you are saying about what it does in terms of the ed voice. 
Interesting, definitely. Thanks for sharing.
Believe you can and you're halfway there.
Theodore Roosevelt.
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tina72
Great that your d is doing so great.
No, here definitivly no horror programs 🙂, only funny series were allowed. Two and a half men and Big bang theory and such things...
Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
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HopeNZ
What an interesting question.  This certainly wasn't the case for us.  However, and I wonder if it might be related, we did notice that my d seemed to lose all empathy while she was very ill.  She laughed at characters' misfortunes on the tv, laughed hard at cruel jokes, showed no indication of pity or embarrassment and was particularly cruel to her little brother while playing board games or card games.  It was unsettling and upsetting at times.  We put it down to the temporary brain injury of malnourishment.  Thankfully this phase passed with nourishment and time.
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Foodsupport_AUS
My D did watch a lot of Criminal Minds as well as Bones as distractions during meals, but we also watched all ten seasons of Friends, several times over. So I can’t say it was a thing for her. My D got sick at 13heading for 14 and refeeding carried on till nearly 16 so I just assumed it was her age.
D diagnosed restrictive AN June 2010 age 13.5. Weight restored July 2012. Relapse and now clawing our way back. Treatment: multiple hospitalisations and individual and family therapy.
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scaredmom
My d has always enjoyed medical shows, the more real the better like "Untold stories of the ER". Even before ED. During refeeding, she would not watch anything as she felt that "screen time" was bad for ones health. 

As long as something gets the food into the child, I say take it!
When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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ACL
Interesting question. Yes,  my normally very sensitive kid watched and read the Hunger Games and the Harry Potter movies. It seemed to me that the intensity made them more distracting from her own distress. Now weight restored she got bad dreams the other night when we re-read watched one of the Harry Potter movies.
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cm72
Very interesting question. My 11 yr old D has gotten into anime which can be extremely graphic in its sex and violence. I’ve been doing the best I can to keep her away from the worst stuff but she seems to love the violence. She also has been begging to watch horror movies and sometimes pretends to stab things or people. This from the girl who loved My Little Pony’s and Hamilton right before her descent. I’m  hoping it will pass as she gets further along (we are about a year in).
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