Wow - instance responses and advice!
Ok, she is 15 and has special educational needs. We live with her 17 year old brother. Her father went off with someone 20 years younger and immediately had 2 more daughters, I broke my leg really badly and had 6 months in a wheelchair, we’ve had to move house from their lifelong home and then my dad, 2 aunts and an uncle died. A month later she stopped eating altogether (Oct 2018). Accessing services was really difficult but she was eventually admitted as she was almost in renal failure. After that, she was referred to FEDS but hated it from the get go and began massively self harming after the sessions. After plodding on for many months with it, (5 hour round trips each time), the general consensus was that it wasn’t beneficial to her and was contributing to her suicidality. The consultant agreed she should not continue with them and referred to CAMHS who have seen her once. We are waiting for some CBT. I take her to a counsellor that I pay for privately every week, and she is a recovered anorexic herself. I have some doubts however, as D comes home saying that it’s ok to eat “something”, but 3 spinach leaves do not constitute “something” in my book! Obviously I’m not privy to their conversations and D loves the “secret” relationship between them. It’s difficult to know objectively what guidance she is being given but she likes to go to talk to this lady.
She is now a “healthy” weight, but her cognitions remain as strong as ever. Her only aim is to be 30kg.
She is due to take her exams this summer and I am trying to keep
her at school. She will not eat anything at school. I have to bring her home for lunch. I cannot make snacks happen as she simply won’t turn up for them.
Today she has refused lunch, so I have taken her phone away. Much shouting and screaming ensued (her not me!) and she is currently wasting her time sulking in her bedroom. It’s difficult to know what’s stroppy teenager and what is ED.
I have to work to keep us afloat, but am finding everything very overwhelming and exhausting now. I can’t go on like this much longer.
She has “safe” foods - salad, salmon, cereal, fruit, fat free yoghurt, occasional crumpets, but it is ever so limited. Prior to this, she would eat literally anything.
She is on meds for depression now and has Melatonin to help her sleep