F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

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KP

Hi all
I was wondering what techniques your sons / daughters find helpful for managing distressing thoughts and feelings after eating please. 

Thank you :-)

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Ronson
We used as much distraction as we possibly could - during and after eating.  Card games, Netflix, dragging her out to do something like go to the cinema or an escape room.  
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sk8r31
For us, watching a comedy show for 30 min in the evening while d drank the 'dreaded shake'.  Here are a couple of distress tolerance skills sheets, which might provide some ideas that 'click' with you & your family.
It is good to not only hope to be successful, but to expect it and accept it--Maya Angelou
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KP
Thanks both. Really helpful. 
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PurpleRain
Lots of TV series, after and sometimes during meals (it was a no no for us before but necessary at the time, we are past it now although I still allow it sometimes)
Sometimes funny videos on the phone 
13 yo d started to eat "healthy" september 2018, she had a growth spur a bit later, followed by tummy bug. She started restricitng breakfast and school lunch in january 2019 (that we know). We are refeeding at home (succesfully I think) since the beginning of march.
I have found inner strenght, patience and compassion that i did not know I had. Never retreat, never surrender
Just keep feeding
 
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Mcmum
Too much TV! Disaster films as they seemed to numb the pain.  Eventually lego and jigsaw puzzles and best of all, a cat. The fur and softness seemed to really soothe. Hope you find something.  Spent a fortune on squeezy balls and fiddle toys for restless hands too and also a very fluffy blanket x
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PurpleRain
I agree, pets are great!
13 yo d started to eat "healthy" september 2018, she had a growth spur a bit later, followed by tummy bug. She started restricitng breakfast and school lunch in january 2019 (that we know). We are refeeding at home (succesfully I think) since the beginning of march.
I have found inner strenght, patience and compassion that i did not know I had. Never retreat, never surrender
Just keep feeding
 
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debra18
My daughter always loved reading. When she was sick she could only read comics. But as soon as she got better she went back to reading all the time. She reads while eating and after. Doesnt even really see what she is eating. Distractions have worked really well for her. Games on iPad, art projects, Lego, board games. We also got hamsters. And she started taking piano lessons when she was at a healthy weight. And now we have a new baby! Just two weeks old! She loves the baby and is a great distraction for her! 
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scaredmom
Debra18,
congratulations on the new baby! Hope everyone is doing well! This is lovely happy news!! 
When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.  (Dejan Stojanovic)

Food+more food+time+love+good professional help+ATDT+no exercise+ state not just weight+/- the "right" medicine= healing---> recovery(--->life without ED)
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debra18
Thank you! We are all doing well. 
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Mcmum
Congratulations! ! Not many babies on this forum!  Such lovely news xx
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sandie
Congratulations Debra. That is really wonderful news. So happy for you all. 
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CED123
Many congratulations on the new baby Debra!

I'm sure you won't be offended though if the rest of us don't adopt that tactic 🙂
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debra18
Lol. I didn't mean to take over the thread.   Babies and pets are a great distraction though if there are any neighbors or relatives around or a dog to walk on the block. I think I am the only feastie still having kids. 
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KP

Having a baby is extreme devotion to distress tolerance. Definitely not for me! Maybe a puppy :-) 

Thanks all and congratulations. 

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Ronson
Congratulations Debra

When my d was really low last year our lovely neighbour and friend let us walk her dog with her each night - just a small walk round the block but it was just enough to have something to look forward to x 
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kazi67
Hi KP
Lots of good ideas here (no babies for me either tho lol) although my d would  probably love one 
congratulations Debra18, that’s 8 now isn’t it?

distractions we used were colouring in, art work/painting, board games, movies/tv, listening to music, massage, phone, we brought a kitten and later on 2 puppies 🐶🐶
they have been the BEST!!! 
She loves them so much 
our kitten had a few issues when we got him
and needed extra care so unfortunately his health wasn’t the best but it gave d something to  care for  and they kind of got better together plus the puppies gives d reason to get down the beach and socialise/meet up with friends at the dog park and get out of the house and into sunshine and fresh air
also they got her out to puppy preschool
so they slowly got her moving in the right direction of getting some sort of life starting again plus a great conversation topic if/when friends did come to visit 
not much to talk about when you’ve been in hospital for 4 months
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debra18
It's my 9. I prefer babies over dogs. 
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tina72
Debra18, I think you are really a warrior mum! Congrats to the new baby!
Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
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tina72
About distress tolerance:
we had a punching bag that was used by my d after the meals to keep her from self harm and that was used by me when she was in school to get (at least partly) rid of MY frustration! It is on the attic now 🙂.
Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
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kazi67
Debra18 I am visualising the breakfast scene from cheaper by the dozen (one of my favourite movies) nearly died laughing when the frog landed in the scrambled eggs 

By the way if anyone is after a very inspirational movie (and distracting for the parents) Ride like a girl, gets 10/10 from me
highly recommend it, don’t forget the tissues tho

i even want my ED d to watch it (20YO) maybe  not the younger ones tho or kids still in the thick of ED,my d in quite good recovery atm 

It really shows how the mind and body really can heal and with guts and determination anything is possible 
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KLB
Initially, nothing seemed to work for our son. He was just too unwell. But once a little more weight went on it became a little easier. 
Things that worked for him;
  • Sitting in a hot shower with head under the water stream.
  • A weighted blanket
  • A fidget cube
  • Logic puzzles - a great free website called puzzle baron does these
  • Jigsaws
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deenl
Nights were the worst for us here so we used a pretty high dose of slow release melatonin to help ensure that he slept and did not lie awake the entire night tortured by the ED.

Warm wishes,

D
2015 12yo son restricting but no body image issues, no fat phobia; lost weight IP! Oct 2015 home, stable but no progress. Medical hosp to kick start recovery Feb 2016. Slowly and cautiously gaining weight at home and seeing signs of our real kid.

May 2017 Hovering around WR. Mood great, mostly. Building up hour by hour at school after 18 months at home. Summer 2017 Happy, first trip away in years, food variety, begin socialising. Sept 2017, back to school FT first time in 2 years. [thumb] 2018 growing so fast hard to keep pace with weight
  • Swedish proverb: Love me when I least deserve it because that's when I need it most.
  • We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence Recovery, then, is not an act but a habit. Aristotle.
  • If the plan doesn't work, change the plan but never the goal.
  • We cannot control the wind but we can direct the sail.
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debra18
My daughter also has trouble at night. She does a very good job of keeping herself busy during the day but has a hard time if she has to eat later at night than usual. 
Just found out about a website http://www.kiwico.com
You pay per month and they send you educational projects to build. 
Also got my daughter language dvds and she learned to type. 
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