F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

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LaraB

Hi my D has recently gained a few kg (Great) after a year of no gain  ( after initial slow but significant gain after diagnosis). Still not weight restored but in a much better place-looking stronger and physically healthier. In the last 10 days, she has developed new symptoms of gagging when eating, very slow eating and holding her food in her mouth for a longtime and disappearing to the bathroom frequently. No sign of purging and I make sure she swallows what is in her mouth, and I think this is about avoiding food.  She says she is struggling with thoughts about the texture of food. I am sure this is ED giving her trouble because of her new weight gain. It is surprising as we have not seen these symptoms and signs before. Just wondering if others have noticed the ED changing how it presents over time. I hope this “phase” does not last long or get worse. 

i have been advised to try to distract her with conversation as thoughts too strong to be dampened by TV. Challenging to keep this up for a couple of hours over meal! 

Interested to know if others have had similar experience.
thanks

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Scaredmom2019
We've had it..it has come and gone over the last year and sometimes would cause "involuntary " vomiting right in front of me. To manage for a while during these times we have stuck to preferred foods versus all foods and have tried to space out food. Less each time with more frequency. We also have used Boost or Ensure when it is bad to make sure we get food in.
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PurpleRain
I've read it in older threads, I think I remember specifically Yogutparfait D, they did deep brethingsshebreathing, her dyD was younger though. Maybe extinction burst? The dreaded last 10 pounds. I hope it passes soon and she keeps gaining.
13 yo d started to eat "healthy" September 2018, she had a growth spurt a bit later, followed by tummy bug. She started restricting breakfast and school lunch in January 2019 (that we know). We succesfully refed at home.
I have found inner strenght, patience and compassion that I did not know I had.
Never retreat, never surrender
keep feeding
 
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joanne34
We had a recent act of our daughter holding as much of the final bits of her meal as she should in her mouth and spitting it down the sink when she cleared her plate and washing her plate to clear the evidence.  Once pulled up on it she doesn't do it anymore.  It could be food avoidance and part of an extinction burst.  We've had an escalation of 'tics' since the last small weight gain.  Hopefully it is a phase and it will pass.
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Foodsupport_AUS
My gut feeling is that many with ED have perseverative thoughts. Once they get started they can be hard to stop. So although there is commonly ongoing fear of gaining weight etc.. how that looks varies over time. My daughter also did the swilling and trying to spit things for a while. There were phases of more compulsive exercise or jiggling, times where there seemed to be more of an issue with squashing the food (to get out the oil), or chewing X times before swallowing. As one behaviour seemed to go another took its place. 
D diagnosed restrictive AN June 2010 age 13. Initially weight restored 2012. Relapse and continuously edging towards recovery. Treatment: multiple hospitalisations and individual and family therapy.
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LaraB

Thanks all. It is interesting as consciously she is motivated to recover at present. She is being open about how she is feeling which is new. She admits that she doesn’t want to go to the bathroom- she just feels as if she does but does not need to. She is really struggling with feelings of nausea and frequent gagging, and just taking very tiny bites which means eating taking all day. @Scaredmom2019 I have started to take same approach of trying to find food she finds easier for now. 

I find the idea of perseverative thoughts helpful. Psychologist suggested new behaviour may be because her meal plan has significantly increased recently and food has become something she needs to get through. I had wondered whether it was the illness reacting to recent weight gain. One way or the other I need to find ways to get enough nutrition in which is very challenging and she has lost some weight. Fortunately she will eat melted ice cream. 
Hoping to find other ways to fill her time and mind may help- hoping to get her to start some challenging school work..... 

@joanne34 I have taken same approach as you. She is not allowed to rinse plate/cereal bowl etc. I have learnt to call out ED behaviour and we are now at a place where I can have those discussions with my D Without it being a major cause of conflict ( fingers crossed -the ability to communicate will continue). 

onwards and upwards........

 

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Foodsupport_AUS
Great that you are finding ways to work around things. Do you think making more of her intake as liquid could be helpful? Switching to a high calorie shake for a snack? 
D diagnosed restrictive AN June 2010 age 13. Initially weight restored 2012. Relapse and continuously edging towards recovery. Treatment: multiple hospitalisations and individual and family therapy.
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Barberton
Hi @LauraB,
I can't say that either of these suggestions will help, but we are trying them right now.

Benecalorie by Nestle is a 45ml quantity of high kilojoule liquid (1300kJ I think) with no flavour. My d has been adding it to drinks or soups to try and get that little bit more in without the volume. I had to purchase through a pharmacy here in Australia.

A book + journal from https://apttherapeuticsolutions.com/index.php/book/

 called "Unpacking Your Eating Disorder". My 14yo d has just started reading it. I gave it a quick first read and was impressed by how well it is written. A real focus on the adolescent. It's an Australian business/therapy group that has written it, but you should be able to get it wherever you are. 

Lastly, just reassure your d that she is safe and doing the right thing.

Goodluck.
D fell down the rabbit hole of AN at age 11 after difficulty swallowing followed by rapid weight loss. Progressing well through recovery, but still climbing our way out of the hole.
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Salee
We are in the Uk under cahms. I read a lot about the teams that their children have supporting them, mainly a physiatrist and/or phycologist. All we have is a fortnightly weigh in with a community nurse who will talk to my d if she engages. Are we missing out on extra help as we are very stuck and I thought my only option was to pay privately if we wanted more help??
Thanks 
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Lonelymum

Hi LaraB

Just wanted to send you all a huge hug along with strength and love to turn this around..It sounds like you have a good team around you and plans are in place. Take all the support you can and please make a little time if you can to take care of yourself. I’m sure more knowledgable people on here will have wiser words than me but I read your posts and I know your daughter is lucky to have you in her corner. Good luck xx

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LaraB
Hi Salee, my understanding is that private care in the Uk is not necessarily better. We are under the specialist eating disorder team within CAHMs. I hope you are too and not just under general cahms.
My understanding is the service offered does vary around the country.

If you think you need more support, i would make contact with the clinical lead on the team and ask for a review and ask about what other support is available. I dont know what stage your daughter is at or where she is at in her recovery journey but there needs to be a plan that you have been involved with, about how to support her to full recovery. 
@Salee if you post on the forum about where things are at with you D now, others may have suggestions about how to move forward also. It is very stressful to feel stuck.
There really is a wealth of knowledge and experience through this forum which has really helped me. Feast also have a parentline you can email or talk on the phone. Xx
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Salee
Thanks 😊 
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LaraB
@Lonelymum thank you for your lovely post and words of encouragement. 💐
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