F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

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Nicstar4 Show full post »
ValentinaGermania
Bad days follow good days but good days also follow bad days.
Please do not stop posting good days. They help you to remind you what is the target.
I am so sorry, I hope you did not burn your skin. Maybe think about serving it not that hot the next time.

"Fight me ED. I am ready to take you on."
That is your mantra today! ED wants to fight today, so he can have that fight!
Tomorrow will be better again!

Tina72
Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
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Foodsupport_AUS
Aargh,sorry to hear it. 

A thought, if she didn't drink don't just say no school tomorrow. Long term consequences tend to be really hard to work towards. Add the supper to her breakfast and then insist both are taken before going to school. You are right, it has to go in. Keep up the great work.


D diagnosed restrictive AN June 2010 age 13. Initially weight restored 2012. Relapse and continuously edging towards recovery. Treatment: multiple hospitalisations and individual and family therapy.
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ValentinaGermania
How are you doing, Nicstar4? I was thinking of you...
Tina72
Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
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Nicstar4
Hi Tina72, thanks for thinking of me!!! We had a bad morning following my sustagen shower! She was getting irrational about butter on her crumpets at breakfast and squeezed them like a sponge to get the butter out! ED behaviours are bizarre! She ripped them up and threw them around the kitchen. I did the usual, you don’t get to choose. My job is to plate, yours to eat. Remade breakkie and said school when you eat. She ran out the house to go school with the others, I followed and said I would come to school and call her out of class to come eat. This was all calm although swear I could see steam coming out of her ears! She eventually ate and I drove her to school. (Got a flat tyre after I dropped her, ugh!)
We spoke at the psychologist about how I was sticking to meal plan rigidly, as we have no option now, and I had back up from her therapist. Her therapist said that she was on the path to hospital. She suggested I call to get earlier apt with psychiatrist to book IOP or book IP bed. We tried to nut out what happens when we have a few good days and she said ED gets angry and louder and she can’t resist and then refuses to eat.
So all in all, chipping away and getting some wins and some losses, but reckon more better than not.
Long response to short question!
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ValentinaGermania
Sorry to hear that you have such a hard time at the moment.
Did you think about taking her off school now to avoid an IP? She will not be able to go to school on IP anyway...

"We tried to nut out what happens when we have a few good days and she said ED gets angry and louder and she can’t resist and then refuses to eat."
That is very common for that state she is in. The secret is really to be able to break up this habit of refusing.

"She ran out the house to go school with the others, I followed and said I would come to school and call her out of class to come eat. This was all calm although swear I could see steam coming out of her ears! She eventually ate and I drove her to school."
You did very good with that. I think it will be better today. If she runs out again, I would lock the door until you allow to leave. Or make it true and get her out of the class. I am sure you will only need to do that once...

Try to keep on fighting.

Tina72

Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
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Nicstar4
So curveball again. Dietician 300g gain. Yay. But all agreed (except d) no sport. She is devastated. I am nearly ready to do all out no school to see if we can get this ongoing weight gain happening.
So d’s stepmum rang to say ex was flying to Byron bay tomorrow to go to rehab/private therapy centre for 3 months. For his depressive episode and alcohol dependence. This has been ongoing for many years, but it is 14 years since he was last hospitalized. The kids don’t have a chance to say goodbye, and he is leaving his phone.
However, I had to tell the kids, and of course AN d thinks it is because of her. Reminded her not so, he has had ongoing difficulties all his life.
A little cross that I have to manage and support them with his decisions as the norm, when I am managing AN. Plus if d does need more treatment, it is only down to me to manage. (Always was, but now absolutely no hope of support.) I am also angry that it may make d worse.
I could not write the script of my life right now, it is getting unbelievable.
I know I just have to do one moment at a time.
I have to trust that we will get there.
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Torie
I wonder if this could be a teachable moment - could you point out how great it is that he's getting the help he needs an how very much better it would have been if he had done this decades ago? xx

-Torie
"We are angels of hope, of healing, and of light. Darkness flees from us." -YP 
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