F.E.A.S.T's Around The Dinner Table forum

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lovemum
Hello all - I’ve asked before but just trying again .. has ANYONE in London Uk had good experience with a treatment centre, program, team or private therapist who supported higher weight for recovery ? The NHS has kept us so stuck on the 50th percentile and my D13 is suicidal currently in a good psych unit but not one that specialises in ED and consultant not convinced higher weight will make any difference . Compounded by a consultation with lead ED consultant at Great Ormond St Hospital who said that it would’ve dangerous to push weight higher. We tried on our own but it got too dangerous with suicide attempts. How can I find someone in London who can support me trying for a higher weight ? Thanks 😥
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ValentinaGermania
First of all the famous Maudsley Hospital who founded FBT is in London. But I think you already know that and made that call. Do they not support you?
My other idea is Dr. Sonia Bues in Oxford. Is a bit far but she also does skype sessions. I am sure she will support you with higher weight.
Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
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Foodsupport_AUS
Sorry that your D continues to suffer so much from her ED. It sounds like your D has been seen at some of the well known units and you still have not been supported. 

I am not in the UK but historically there has been very little support for higher weights in the UK, many seem to be discharged at less than 50th centile. The problem is of course that there is little evidence other than anecdotal for higher weights and recovery, and with your D being suicidal there is genuine fear that more weight may make her feel worse than better. Having had a D who was also suicidal for a long time, I can understand that angle too. 
Are they slowly increasing her weight according to age at least? It is of course normal for weight to be increasing into the early 20's. 
D diagnosed restrictive AN June 2010 age 13. Initially weight restored 2012. Relapse and continuously edging towards recovery. Treatment: multiple hospitalisations and individual and family therapy.
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lovemum
Thanks for replies. The Maudsley follow NHS guidelines - which is to feed a “normal diet” to teens once they are at 50%. Obvs a normal NHS diet is not what teens eat in the real world but a kind of fat phobic “balanced” meal plan . I am being told left right and centre that her weight is ok and to leave her meal plan alone and let them focus on her suicidality. 
The therapists are good and gaining a little trust with her . She is attending groups and school in hospital, coming to FT  and talking to personal therapist . But the second she is off one to one for a moment she tries to SH or die.   The other day I saw her for lunch - we had macaroni cheese which I’d taken in and talked about Christmas plans. She smiled and cuddled the dog and me . She had plans for how she wanted to decorate the house . Then doctor had planned for her to take first trip out of the unit in the afternoon - just her and two nurses one on each side. They talked about it thoroughly beforehand - how to manage destructive thoughts and whether she was able to stay safe for half an hour - they felt confident. Then ten minutes into the walk    she broke free and ran in front of a car. Nurses very shaken. Now no leave over Christmas.
she was very sorry afterwards and keeps making promises that it won’t happen again but now of course it’s veryhard to believe her . My poor poor little girl cannot help this. 
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ValentinaGermania
So maybe think about contacting Dr. Sonia Bues. I think she will help you to tackle that. She knows that it is about state, not weight.
Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
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CED123
Just to add that I have talked with Sonia Bues and she is lovely. 
Currently no light; only tunnel 🙁
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ValentinaGermania
lovemum wrote:
The other day I saw her for lunch - we had macaroni cheese which I’d taken in and talked about Christmas plans. She smiled and cuddled the dog and me . She had plans for how she wanted to decorate the house . Then doctor had planned for her to take first trip out of the unit in the afternoon - just her and two nurses one on each side. They talked about it thoroughly beforehand - how to manage destructive thoughts and whether she was able to stay safe for half an hour - they felt confident. Then ten minutes into the walk    she broke free and ran in front of a car. Nurses very shaken. Now no leave over Christmas.
she was very sorry afterwards and keeps making promises that it won’t happen again but now of course it’s veryhard to believe her . My poor poor little girl cannot help this. 


We did not have suicidal attempts but a lot of problems with self harm. We experienced that feeding a diet with lots of fats and glucose helped with mood and we saw less self harm and with less fats and glucose we saw more.
Is she eating often enough so that her blood sugar does not go down? Mine could accept 4-5 hour gaps in between and is still fine with that but not more. I know from others that suicidal thoughts and self harm increase if they do not eat every 3-4 hours.
Keep feeding. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
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