| Laura Collins | |
| Laura |
| | May 23, 2007 at 10:50 AM | Reply with quote | #2 |
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I'll go first.
My daughter became ill with anorexia in 2002 when she was 14. After two months of passively watching her decline mentally and physically while doing individual therapy we were told to admit her to residential care. Instead, we decided to do family-based care. Within days she was eating normal meals, in two months she was weight restored, and over the next year we gradually turned back over control of her meals. None of this was easy, but it did work.
In the years since then, our daughter has pretty much lived a normal teenage life.
She has experienced bouts of eating disorder thinking and behaviors - triggered by stress, transitions, and small weight losses. She has needed varying degrees of support from us, therapists, and nutritionists as she has learned to take over her own care and independence. She is now 19 years old, and enjoying an independent college life.
I am so proud of her.
My daughter is a fierce, funny, strong kid, and she is my hero. Her illness is not her fault, nor was it her choice, but she has been the one who has done the hard work of recovery. Our role, as parents, was to give her that opportunity and not settle for anything less.
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| Riv |
| | June 01, 2007 at 09:09 AM | Reply with quote | #3 |
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Alright then, I'll go second :-)
Dear all,
Warm wishes from Australia...
We are still re-feeding and it is tough, no doubt about that, but the difference from seeing our daughter a walking skeleton, to an almost healthy looking 16 y.o. is an absolute miracle (not in the biblical sense!) that I had begun to think could never occur.
We had taken the advice of professionals, and our precious daughter was still rapidly losing weight. Parental instinct told us this had to stop. We began re-feeding with her, and for the first time in at that stage, 18 months, felt like we could actually do something to bring about positive change in our daughter's condition.
At this point in time, she is almost at her IBW, and her thoughts and behaviours are still largely driven by anorexia. We are working with a MM therapist who keeps us on track when we are exhausted, overwhelmed, and disheartened.
We know there is no other way-we tried that and she spiralled further and further into anorexia. She needs the support of her family, to know we are there with her no matter how long it takes, that we will not give up on her, that wer'e in there for the fight. Whenever she explodes and it's incredibly difficult (hell actually), we try to remember that we need to model what it looks like to fight anorexia-calm and firm. This is the hardest work we have done in our lives, and the most important.
hugs,
Riv
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| Whistler |
| | June 04, 2007 at 11:53 AM | Reply with quote | #4 |
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I want to share my daughter's siilly birthday cake with you--on her actual birthday, I made her pretty fruit-in-gelatin parfaits, which she asked for, but she wanted no cake. Then the day before her party with her friends, she said "what about my cake?" She's 16, and they were going to Pirates of the Caribbean, and I made her a pirate shipwreck in a blue Caribbean sea. Chocolate ship, vanilla cake sea, almond bark island, white sugar beaches, and lots of love. And relief.
I don't come here much anymore, because she is better, and we both have to move on. I can't quite move, on, though, both because once something like this happens, it's hard to trust that she's ok, and because this site helped me so much, and so helped her so much. I came here for the practical and just for support, for people to share with and people who had an idea about why something was happening and how to deal with it. I am profoundly grateful.
She became sick quite suddenly just after her 14th birthday; she lost 30 pounds in six weeks. We're pretty convinced (on good evidence) that it was strep-antibody triggered (PANDAS), and treated for that, but struggled through the horrible refeeding. It took six months for her period to come back, but that whole first year she was weakened, caught any virus going around, depressed, angry, withdrawn, not sleeping right. It was more than a year before the horrible depression and sleep problems faded. And now, two years later, I say cautiously that she's well, joyous, glorious, gorgeous, successful, probably a little "overweight" among her friends. (a little mistrusting of doctors, which is not good, but...) And when she asked me the other day why her friends fought with their mothers, and we didn't, I thought but did not say that we had done it all at once, when I had to fight the AN and she had to defend it.
So, as dark as it seems, there is hope for all your dear children, and for you. Fight the AN, trust yourselves, and know that as hard as it may seem to get that one spoonful in today, your child is in there and your struggles can lead back to health.
Best,
Whistler.
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| lydia |
| | June 08, 2007 at 12:00 AM | Reply with quote | #5 |
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It's been a while since I've updated our d's progress. On May 31st she celebrated her 22nd birthday. It was a wonderful day for all of us. For the first time in 5 years she really enjoyed family, friends and her food...including cake  .
She's now been weight restored for several months, and has learned how to manage her diet without oversight. She's enjoying school, has a boyfriend and will be spending her summer interning at our local Public Radio station and getting ready for the GRE. In short, she has her life back--her sense of humor, her ability to be with and enjoy others and will soon be returning to her own apartment.
The past 6 months has been an amazing and humbling journey for our family.
We look back at the multiple failures of the health care and insurance systems to meet our d's needs for most of the past 5 years, and are determined to do what we can to help others find their way to real healing for their children.
We'll be monitoring our d's ability to sustain her health over the next 6 months, with the mutual agreement that if she needs more support, she'll always have her bedroom ready at home. We feel so blessed by the help of the Maudsley Team at the University of Chicago...especially Dr. Chen; and the shared stories and advice of so many we met here on this site. Thanks especially to Laura and Harriet, for your wisdom and perserverance on behalf of sufferers and families. We owe so much to so many of you for your encouragement and help. |
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| Chocolate |
| | June 08, 2007 at 08:28 AM | Reply with quote | #6 |
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Hello Lydia,
Congratulations to your family for a job well done! Thank you for the posting I was wondering how things were going at your house. I am very very happy to hear how well your d. is doing thanks to all the love of her family and her determination. It is wonderful to hear that she got her life back, she had suferred for a long time.
Warm hugs your way.
Chocolate
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| Carolin G |
| | June 16, 2007 at 09:05 AM | Reply with quote | #7 |
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Hi all,
Our story began back in Dec 1999 when d commented "I'm fat & want to loose weight". By Sept 2000 she realised "there's something wrong but I don't know what" and 1mth later was diagnosed with AN and admitted to her local rural hospital. Between 2000 - 2003 she had 3 admissions to hospital, 2 treatments with private outpatient professionals all of whom approached treating her with "individual therapy" ("she has to do it herself")...... and my h and I with a "parentanectomy". In Sept 2003 she was admitted to Westmead Children's Hospital/Sydney for 7mths to be weaned off a NG tube and re-establish eating. Enter Maudsley. They have been 100% supportive and we continue to support their work.
Today, 8yrs down the track she is an incredible, artistic, creative individual whom I love more dearly as each day goes by. She is completing her final year in secondary school and is looking forward(with a little anxiety) to moving away from home and becoming independent. Her desire is to relocate to Sydney, try working for a year before taking on tertiary study. She laughs, smiles, holds adolescent views, listens to music, goes out dancing, supports the local youth group/network, eats well at home and away, socializes and is a mature 18y.o. I have every confidence in her ability to take the next step. She knows that there is always help at home if needed and she has an older sister and brother in Sydney who can "look out for her".
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| leeshka |
| | June 26, 2007 at 03:18 PM | Reply with quote | #8 |
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Hello to all
Have never posted on this site before
Have been refeeding our AN daughter for almost 9 months. Happy to say she gained 30 pounds in the process...although not at her goal weight yet. have been playing with that last 5 lbs. up and down for last 2 months. The 2nd stage of our d taking on more responsibility has been extremely difficult. She verbalizes that she can do it; wants to "show" us she can do it etc...etc... but in the end usually goes back to selecting the same snacks etc...that she use to choose. Took a vacation to the beach last week and it was the first time I had to "let go" and not record every bite she took (this was agreed upon with the counselor). It was very difficult to let go. Our d lost 2 pounds that week and I could feel my stomach knot up. Now this week she is in Michigan (with no parental supervision) on a church sponsored service event. Everything was discussed at length in counseling about choices etc... I find I think about her constantly this week. Wondering what she is eating, or not eating. If she loses weight again I want to suggest to the counselor that the refeeding begin again. I don't think she is ready (or maybe I am not) for this big step. Any feedback from anyone who has already experienced this would be appreciated. Our d still seems to think that as soon as the "goal" weight is established, she will be done will everything and I will be off her back.
L
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| Harriet |
| | June 26, 2007 at 04:13 PM | Reply with quote | #9 |
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Hi Leeshka,
Sounds to me like your d is not ready to have total independence around eating. It's very common for therapists and drs to be too quick to hand it back. As you will see from reading other posts on this site, there is not much to be gained by doing this and a lot to lose--literally as well as figuratively.
My d has been weight restored for a year now and I suspect our experience is typical. My h and I still at times step in--like now, for instance, when we have agreed that d needs to gain 5 or 6 pounds; she's very athletic, and though her weight and height have stayed steady, we feel that she's been building muscle and hence losing body fat. She's been "working on it" for the last month or so but the reality is that it's much easier for her to have our support, encouragement, and some input on her eating. I really don't think she's having a lot of anorexic thoughts, either; it has more to do with the fact that her metabolism is such that she loses weight very easily and gains it with difficulty. I think this is true for many people with anorexia.
I guess what I'm trying to say is follow your instinct about what your d is ready for, and don't let the therapist sway you. You might, for instance, start with allowing your d to choose and manage one snack or possibly one meal (lunch or breakfast) each day. That way if her choices don't quite do it, the damage is limited and you can continue to encourage her toward more appropriate choices. I don't understand the all or nothing mentality so many clinicians seem to have, but I do know that you don't have to do it that way. A more gradual transference, over many months, is better IMO.
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| ripley |
| | July 04, 2007 at 08:51 PM | Reply with quote | #10 |
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It's been over a year since my last update, so here goes. Wish I could start with something like "we've declared our independence from the eating disorder", but it's way too early in the process. Our 17-year-old daughter has been recovering from anorexia since November 2005, and her experience has paralleled others on this forum in many respects. Although I never posted about the worst days, they were definitely ugly. And we were among the 'lucky few' who actually had Maudsley-supportive health care at the beginning, and have only had a few therapist issues so far. Now our daughter is making healthy, independent decisions involving food and life in general. She still struggles with anxiety and depression when things get stressful, but most days are good days now, and we're really proud of her strength and determination in fighting this. The forum has been a great support: it was my only support during the really crazy times. It's hard for others to understand unless they've personally dealt with an eating disorder in their family. It's really hard to separate the disease from the child when everything that child's doing - and thinking - is self-destructive, scary, irrational, or just plain annoying! But here on the forum, you already get that. Your love, patience and humor always shine through your posts, and it's great to hear about these wonderful kids coming back to life. I haven't been posting much lately: at some point we all need to step back from the abyss. But anorexia will always be there, and the way I see it, every layer of accountability helps. For me that means being open and up-front in sharing our experience, and continuing to educate myself, my daughters (even though they don't want to hear it) and others about this illness. So I'll wade through the research studies - and bookmark them for my "ED Risk Factors" file, because most of them apply to my daughter - and hope for more breakthroughs from the scientists. I'll keep learning from the blogs, chiming in on the forum, and advocating for mental health and family-based therapy when I can. There's hope, it does get better! Ann |
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| Mari |
| | July 10, 2007 at 09:30 AM | Reply with quote | #11 |
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We have crested 110 lbs! After fighting this thing for more than 18 months, I am starting to believe we can make it. I tried not to do a happy dance and I wished I could send a text message to my Mom to give her an update whenever we reached a significant milestone.
We had a relapse last summer after my Mom passed. She was my support and my daughter's support. Things just crumbled for us. My daughter is much better now than she was before the relapse. She eats snacks she chooses for herself. I hear her go into the kitchen for a handful of pretzels or a bowl of fruit. Last night she made a peanut butter sandwich--with extra peanut butter on the side!
She still has AN thoughts, and she still needs another 5 lbs or so. She is starting to be concerned about eating too much as she gives in to the urge to snack. It's not binging, but rather the type of snacking any normal teenager does. I struggle to find the words to convince her that she is fine and normal. She has not had her period either, but I am hopeful about that.
She also noticed that an older pair of jeans was a bit tight last night. I'm afraid those jeans disappeared over night (I suspect the Tight Cothes Fairy-she takes any piece of clothing that causes stress to recovering anorexics).
I told her I would replace any piece of clothing that she outgrows.
We actually could laugh about an animal channel program where the animal cops seized a bunch of starved potbellly pigs and eventually took them to a potbelly pig ranch where they recovered and looked like normal piggies. Talk about your before and after pics! Daughter joked that she hoped to end up somewhere between the skeletal pigs and the really big pigs! Six months ago, I don't think she would have even watched this.
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| scared mom |
| | July 14, 2007 at 09:18 AM | Reply with quote | #12 |
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My d was hospitalized when she was 12 years old in Nov. of 2006. She weighted 68.3 lbs. and was 4' 11. She spent 17 days in an inpatient hospital and was sent home, by mid January she was at her healthy weight of 90 lbs. She was then allowed to participate on a basketball team and managed to maintain her weight. She has slowly dropped a pound, gained a pound, lost two, etc. since then. We have tried everything with her, letting her participate in sports, not letting her and nothing seems to work.
She now weighs 81 lbs and says that she hates food, her mood is okay during other parts of the day when she is not eating. She is eating a 3000 per day diet and gaining slowly. Every meal, snack it is a huge struggle and she cries at every meal. We have limited her exercise to 15 minutes per day, walking, shooting baskets, etc. She just told me that she hates food and she will never like it again. She has a doctors appointment on Monday at the hospital that she was admitted to in November. She has been seeing a nutritionist as well as a therapist. How do we help her see that food is energy and not the enemy? I am at a loss of what to do.
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| Harriet |
| | July 14, 2007 at 10:26 AM | Reply with quote | #13 |
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Dear scaredmom,
It seems to me that your d never really reached a healthy weight. My d's goal at 4'11" was 96 pounds. And she grew 3 inches the year of refeeding (has your d grown?) which put it up more. For her perhaps a healthy weight at her height would be more like 100 or 105.
In terms of how to get your d to "see" that food is fuel, you really cannot at this point. She is not rational on the subject right now and will not be able to think clearly about this until she's weight restored for a time. This is from the Maudsley Parents website FAQs:
How can I make my child understand so she wants to get better? What can she read? What can I say?
We wish there were "magic words" that would inspire your child to eat. If teens with anorexia were motivated to recover on their own, recovery would be much simpler. Most families find that they can make progress once they set aside concerns about "motivation" and concentrate on weight restoration, while offering lots of emotional support. The idea that kids have to "choose" recovery, or it somehow doesn’t count, has been part of the conventional wisdom in eating disorders treatment for a long time. Unfortunately most teens can’t "want to get better" while they’re in the grip of an eating disorder. Plenty of parents have found that once their child was weight-restored, psychological recovery followed. Think about it: The brain is part of the physical body. When it’s malnourished, it doesn’t work right. When it’s well-nourished over a period of time, rational thinking resumes. For some kids the change happens fast; for others, weeks or months of full nutrition must pass before cognitive and emotional responses improve. But it does happen. The end goal of Maudsley treatment is for kids to eat healthfully and happily on their own. Once a sufferer is physically well and able to maintain a healthy weight, treatment shifts to Phase Two, returning control over eating to the recovering teen. Typically at this point the sufferer is able to handle responsibility for eating.
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| scared mom |
| | July 14, 2007 at 10:55 AM | Reply with quote | #14 |
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Her medical doctor(s) gave us the healthy weight goal. We will continue to go by that until we reach and are able to maintain and then we will go from there.
I am confused by you stating that your daughters goal was 96 and then state that perhaps my daughters goal would be 100-105? Anyway, I will continue to go by what her physician is suggesting at this point.
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| md |
| | July 14, 2007 at 11:01 AM | Reply with quote | #15 |
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scared mom, first of all, it's great that your daughter has gone from 68 to 81 pounds. That's tremendous improvement. As for the "healthy" weight, I would take the doctor's recommendation as an initial goal, but I also think that you need to realize that one can't really know what a healthy weight is until the person reaches the weight and is healthy. That is, if your daughter reaches 90 pounds and feels good, looks good, and gets her period, the weight is healthy. If she reaches 90 pounds and doesn't look good, maintains eating-disordered behavior, and doesn't advance through puberty, 90 pounds isn't healthy. It's my impression from reading messages on this site that many doctors lowball target weights. That isn't good for kids with EDs, for whom loss of even a couple of pounds can make a big difference in mood and health.
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| Marie #2 |
| | July 14, 2007 at 11:19 AM | Reply with quote | #16 |
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Scared Mom,
As you may have noticed from reading other threads on this board, many feel that the professionals set the target weights too low. I know for my d, who is 4'11.5, her n was happy when she reached 90 pounds. I knew that my d had always had a bmi above 19 pre-AN, so I didn't believe that stopping at an 18 bmi was a good idea. So I decided it should be higher and have pushed her up to 96 pounds. (My d has not reached puberty yet, or I would have pushed her higher.) Perhaps you can consider how her weight pre-AN was to determine if your d had truly been at a good weight.
As for your d being able to maintain her weight on her own, I think it is just to early to do this. My d has been weight restored since March, and I still have to make menu plans for her and ensure that she eats every meal. She eats what I tell her without much fuss, but she admits that she would not be able to eat enough without this guidance. Many on this board have mentioned that it took their d's anywhere from 5 months - 12 months before their d's were able to handle independent eating.
At this point, I think you need to get your d back to a healthy weight (whatever you believe that to be) and keep her there for several months. Hopefully, you and I will both be able to enjoy the success that others on this board have had.
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| Harriet |
| | July 14, 2007 at 12:00 PM | Reply with quote | #17 |
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This is all great advice, scaredmom. We are so used to thinking of weights as a kind of formula, but really it's a very individual thing. Each person's body is different, and each person will have different needs. Also, you can have two kids who are the same height and weight, and one will be perfectly OK and the other will still be grappling with eating-disordered behaviors and thoughts. That's just kind of the way it is.
Pediatricians and dr.s definitely tend to lowball. I love our pediatrician dearly, and she saw our family through the worst of refeeding. But even she underestimates my d's weight needs. My d is currently 16, nearly 5'3", and weighed 111 pounds. I had a gut feeling that she needed to gain a few pounds, mostly because she's very athletic and had been bike racing, building muscle and not gaining any weight. So she was actually losing body fat, though her weight remained stable. I also noticed that she was avoiding certain foods, or seemed to be (though she always had a reason why), and they were all high fat foods like ice cream. I took d to the dr. and brought this up and was told that I was being too anxious and needed to let go. Well, I'm bullheaded, so I didn't accept this. I told d she had to gain 5 or 6 pounds or we would cut the bike racing. We stepped up the food, making sure she was getting some of those high-cal foods, and within 2 weeks her mood and eating had improved dramatically. And she acknowledged that she'd been starting to obsess about healthy eating again. In other words, she was on the verge of a relapse, despite what the dr. said, and she needed to step it up.
So now I use my observations of my d as a guide. If she starts to get that look, or I notice any of the very beginnings of what looks like restricting, we jump on it. Each time it's easier, and each time she takes a little more control. But even now I don't think she could do it on her own. You are your child's best ally in this, and you've got to go with your observations and instincts.
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| Maria |
| | July 14, 2007 at 04:19 PM | Reply with quote | #18 |
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My daughter is almost 11. She was diagnosed with anorexia when she had barely turned 10. We were introduced to the Maudsley Approach by a psychologist who is an eating disorder specialist. I am one of those people who researches stuff ad naseum but in this case I didn't want to start researching about anorexia because I thought what I would find out would scare me to death. We have been doing this approach in the dark with very little guidance from the psychologist. Today I started reading about it and realize how many things we have done wrong. We have gotten so angry at our daughterl. This whole process has been SO stressful and has been detrimental to our relationship. I was about ready to throw in the towel until I ran into this group. Right now, she is 5,2 (very tall) and last week weighed 83 lbs. Her BMI is 15. She is also OCD and a compulsive exerciser. In our case, controlling exercise has been a lot more difficult than refeeding. She extremely athletic and is obsessed with moving and being outdoors.
I hope to read and learn from all of you.
Thank you for having this group. It has given me so much hope!
Maria
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| Laura |
| | July 16, 2007 at 07:12 PM | Reply with quote | #19 |
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Maria and all,
You are welcome here. Please feel free to start a new "thread" with your questions and feelings!
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| Mary Kay |
| | July 23, 2007 at 04:54 PM | Reply with quote | #20 |
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Our family has been refeeding since November and we finally feel as if we're approaching the edge of the forest -- not so deep in anymore as we have been for six years since she was 7. I have been too exhausted and overwhelmed to post here, but read occasionally.
Regarding goal weight. My daughter's pediatrician, an AN specialist, has said that she wants to see 90 pounds -- my daughter is about 4'11" and now at about 84 after gaining 20 pounds. After reading these posts, this now sounds too low.
The refeeding has been very slow and brutal. But finally for the first time, she looks like a 13-year-old -- a bit on the thin side, but her legs are beautiful, her arms looks normal, her face has filled out. She doesn't stand out like a sore thumb in a crowd of girls anymore. She is clearly not there yet -- lots of AN thoughts and resistance -- and not ready to be on her own, but now I'm worried about what weight we should be shooting for. It's still such a struggle.
When our eating disorder ped. suggested 90 pounds, our Maudsley team in NYC even seemed to think that was a little high.
I don't want to get overconfident and let go too soon.
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| Penny |
| | July 30, 2007 at 12:05 AM | Reply with quote | #21 |
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Hi- First, thank you thank you thank you to all who have posted on this site over the years. I have learned so much and my daughter was the beneficiary of all of the experience before us. My daughter is 16. She had mono at 15 (spring 2006). No one ever suggested that we watch her eating but now I find out that girls with mono often end up with eating disorders. So there we were with a 15 year old who suddenly had dropped from 95 to 85. She insisted that she did not want to lose weight, she just had no appetite. We finally found this site last fall after a horrible summer of begging her to eat. Reading about other parents' experiences with their defiant children on eating issues, helped us tremedously to garner our resources and meet the challenges of the ED monster that had a hold on our beautiful daughter. Using Maudsley principles on our own, our daughter was weight restored within a few months. She has continued to grow and develop- she is now up to 110 pounds (at 5'4") the most she has ever weighed. Last month she got her first period. So we feel we are on the right track but we are not yet letting down our guard. For those of you whose daughters are having periods, do you take that as a sign that the weight is healthy and sufficient? Again, thanks for all the help.
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| Chocolate |
| | July 30, 2007 at 07:54 AM | Reply with quote | #22 |
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Hi Penny,
Congratulations on your achievements!
I don't believe that the return of the period is sufficient. Our d. never lost it even at her lowest weight of 99 lb. She is 5'4 1/2" like your daughter and not until she was around 118 that we started to see improvement on her AN thoughts.
Others might have differents experiences.
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| Harriet |
| | July 30, 2007 at 08:04 PM | Reply with quote | #23 |
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I agree--period alone is not enough. I think the best evaluation looks for markers of physical health (menstruation, bone health, continued growth or staying on a child's growth curve, "normal" hunger and satiety cues) and psychological health (cessation of anorexic thoughts and impulses, reduced anxiety, depression, and obsessiveness, ability to eat with hunger and satiety cues).
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WendyMoyer
Registered: July 31, 2007
Posts: 14
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| | Aug 13, 2007 at 08:29 PM | Reply with quote | #24 |
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Just wanted to update everyone!
Char went out to Hershey for a check up since it has been 6 months and she has been having that weird GI pain and other symptoms.
The main dr was not to see her today but came in when the nurse practiciner asked him too. The NP was very much like you need to go to therapy or you can come back out here to partial etc (my daughter has been saying for some time therapy is not really helping since she only feels really bad when she is in pain) and that she should see a dietician since she is having issues with her foods (GI ones). HOWEVER she was happy that she gained about a pound a month. That is the low range (1 to 2 once the critical portion of weight has been put back on...since they release them at heavier weights them most places) but she said that was great considering she felt so ill. She has at least 5 more to gain (according to all) MIN but could go about 10 more.
Then the main dr came in and said Hey Char! How have you been? You look good etc. He was the one who said the day he saw her in january that she had a complication of refeeding syndrome called altered mental status but he had only read about it. This guy is NEAT and he is one of the few that believe you can have a non pyschological start to an ED. Anyhow...he said you don't need to do therapy anymore if you don't feel like it as you seem quite good with it all and that her pain that no dr could dx is more then likely very simular to what an ampute feels called phantom pain. He gave her a trial of a medication used for that in cases like this and he also said he has seen this in other folks that had organs removed that hurt....it seems to still be there at times. She had bloods drawn there and is going back out on the 27th. She is hopeful that this is the right thing he has in mind.
He also said he believes any left over stuff she has rolling around in her mind (post tramatic stress etc) will go away with the pain since she only feels bad mentally when dealing with the pain.
Anyhow...just wanted to let you know what is up.
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sondrad
Registered: Sept 27, 2007
Posts: 1
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| | Sept 27, 2007 at 10:57 AM | Reply with quote | #25 |
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Hi Laura and all,
Its been a while and we have been extrememly preoccupied by our daughter, work, other family and trying to fit in time to actually enjoy this life as it rushes by!
Was thinking of this group and thought I should post an update.
Chelsea is not yet at full recovery weight, bt showing progress upward. In part her new MD at Yale has us rethinking the concept of recovery in more broad terms, other than weight. It has been a very positive approach, as we continue to support Chelsea in a modified Maudsley method. We still supervise most of her meals and incentivize her to choose to complete all food required. Chelsea has gradually embraced more of the self direction, as her weekly visit and weigh ins with Dr Ryan have become very important to her and her progress is hers to own. She is motivated by a thumbs up from Dr Ryan, meaning things went up. We also find natural incentives to help to continue her upward approach (trips, college searches, etc). Chelsea's mental health is remarkably better! She has matured and has a more stable, objective approach to her emotional issues, due in large part to her weekly and sometimes bi weekly visit with her therapist whom she has come to respect and adore. We have also explored some family dynamics which have vastly improved communications amongst our family members.
Anxiety has played a very critical role in Chelsea's anorexia and we have explored ways to reduce anxiety triggers, while at the same time strengthen Chelsea's resiliency to stress. Chelsea has been withdrawn from school and now studies in an online classroom, which has proven very positive. We have recently however choosen to delay her applicaiton to colleges for a while until we see a change in her patterns of eating and weight gain (they have become a bit erratic). She was naturaly disappointed, but this too has become a natural incentive for her and she has shown weight increase two weeks in a row. Once we see a pattern of upward growth set in we will reconsider our college search and application process.
While i am still stressed by her low weight (she has gone from a BMI of 14 to a BMI of 17, since March of last spring), her improved mental outlook and emotional health has relieved some of the panic and hopeless/helplessness we originally felt.
One closing word to all, this has become a life's work, a constant effort, a challenge on daily basis. What I once thought would be tackled and overcome in months, now shows itself to be years of work and supervision with years more of montioring. We have come to accept this and even find strength in being able to work collectively as a team in beating this disease. Both Chelsea and I see great things in her future and look forward to the day we can help others through the dark, scary, acute onset days of early treatment. There is an answer and hope and accomplishment through this all. It does improve, not overnight and not one large step. We both know there will never be a day where it was "like it used to be", but we have found a comfortable space in what is and strength and bonding in managing this day by day. She is a remarkable young woman and finding herself in all of this mess has been something beautiful to see. Growth in process amidst all its mess and detail. No greater gift could I have.
In Peace and hope for all who are here
Sondra
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Chocolate
Mentor
Registered: Sept 02, 2007
Posts: 370
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| | Sept 27, 2007 at 11:39 AM | Reply with quote | #26 |
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Sondra,
Congratulations on your niece's improvement. She has come a long way and I am very happy for you and your family, it hasn't be easy but your love and understanding have made all possible.
A big hug for a wonderful ant and person.
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My19thNB
Registered: Sept 01, 2007
Posts: 7
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| | Oct 09, 2007 at 05:42 PM | Reply with quote | #27 |
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For anyone who is discouraged and thinks ED's wrath will never end, it will.
Our then 12 yr old d was diagnosed with ED early on. She had lost about 13 pounds through dieting. After an unsuccessful stint in a day hospital - she dropped all the weight she had gained and then some after her release - we muddled around for a month until finding embarking on Maudsly in April.
After much screaming, throwing, kicking, breaking, etc., things calmed down. Our d has gained back all of the weight and is in phase 2.
Her thinking is still somewhat off - worried about calories, exercise and scared of some foods. We are working on the scary foods now. However, her overall frame of mind is so much better.
To anyone who feels overwhelmed - keep pushing. Without Maudsly and without this forum for moral support we would not have made it this far.
Our d is 13, 4"10" and 98 lbs.
Interestingly, it is now that I myself am having more trouble as I am completely exhausted.
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Whistler
Mentor
Registered: Sept 04, 2007
Posts: 228
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| | Oct 09, 2007 at 06:35 PM | Reply with quote | #28 |
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So glad to hear your d. is so much better. Hang in there--it really took almost a year before our d's mind recovered.....Lots of admiration for your fighting the demon so successfully.
I had the same reaction--when my d. was better, I became exhausted and depressed and.....I think I held it together to help her, and then when I could let up a little realized the toll it had taken on me. Now, though, she's recovered, and incredibly successful all around, and so are my other 2, so I'm much more joyful. I will never trust again that my kids are ok the way I did before, but as I came to trust that she was stable, I managed to catch little by little a good breeze that helped me. Take care of yourself.
Best,
Whistler
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carol
Registered: Oct 09, 2007
Posts: 1
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| | Oct 09, 2007 at 11:57 PM | Reply with quote | #29 |
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The day of true recovery has finally come!!!
At this time last year we were just completing the medical diagnosis of anorexia with our then 15 year old daughter. After passing through stages of shock and guilt, we took her to professional classes and discussed inpatient care. She did not go inpatient, but found no help through classes and our daughter lost more weight - I am finding this to be extremely painful, so forgive me, I am not going to go into more detail.
We started the Maudsley approach at home in December 2006. Our daughter was weight restored in about February or March 2007. Today, I mean, TODAY (YEAH!!!) she has finally received her menstrual cycle - a sign of her body letting her know she is OK again. I was beginning to think that she may never see this cycle again, even though she seemed to be recovered.
Laura, as you've said, there may be subtle setbacks - wisdom teeth extractions were a challenge, but all in all, you're right, so far the setbacks are subtle.
Laura Collins, I wish I could see you in person to give you the BIGGEST, WARMEST hug and tell you how you've saved our daughter etc., etc., and saved my sanity with this website - although I probably wouldn't be able to speak because I'm in tears now!!!
THANK YOU will NEVER be enough!!
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Chocolate
Mentor
Registered: Sept 02, 2007
Posts: 370
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| | Oct 10, 2007 at 07:29 AM | Reply with quote | #30 |
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Carol, you brought tears to my eyes. I am very happy for you. Congratulations on a job well done! |
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LauraCollinsUS
Moderator
Registered: July 31, 2007
Posts: 4,036
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| | Oct 10, 2007 at 10:52 AM | Reply with quote | #31 |
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All of you on this forum inspire me every day - and this story and all the other updates are a gift to those just starting out to know that there is a light in the tunnel if you keep moving forward. |
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Registered: Member deleted
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| | Dec 15, 2007 at 06:18 PM | Reply with quote | #32 |
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Our battle began in 2004, when my duaghter, who had always been underweight, voiced her concerns of body image. She thought herself as "fat", but wasn't acting upon these images. While I did realize that her weight was fairly low for her age/height, we began adding food to her diet and doing weekly weigh ins. D was alright with the situation. Within six months, we got her from 5'2" and 77lbs. to a healthy 95lbs. Thus, I thought that the worst of our luck was behind.
During the next year and a half, d remained extremly healthy and active, as always. She maintained her body weight and even added a few pounds, in addition to a few inches. However, I watched her figure decline in December of 2006. I figured that I would let her come to me, and the weight drop could have just been from over activity (d is an irish dancer, cross country runner, and track athlete), becuase she was eating bodaciously.
On December 30, 2005, d came to me in tears and confessed she had been sneaking in exercises at night/morning. She said that the exercise constantly was unbearable, and she wanted help. I made her stop, obviously, and weighed her immediatly. At 5'4", she had gone from a healthy 97lbs to 86lbs withing just a month.
Over the next few weeks, d wouldn't eat hardly anything. She said that no food was needed, since she couldn't exercise. I took her to the ER a few times, and they refused to admit her, since her electrolytes were still stable. However, they did put d into a phsyciatric unti during the day. I thought that things were going to get better- they even had her meet with a dietician! The dietician put d on a 1600 calorie meal plan. I sensed disaster, but all of her doctors told me to back off, because this was a process. Meanwhile, d's weight had dropped down to 80lbs.
By the ladder part of Febuary, d was complaining of fainting spells, extreme depression, and loss of will to do anything. She followed that damned diet religously though, down to every last calorie. One day, while she was warming her cold body by the fire. I saw a gray cast over her, and begged God that it wasn't time. I then began making phone calls.
On Febuary 22nd, d was admitted to the Cleveland Clinic at 72lbs., with a sitting pulse of 29 and a standing pulse of 120. The doctor told us that if we'd have waited any longer, it would have been too late.
D's heart had shrunk, and she was put on bedrest for eight days. We then were forced to put her IP, due to extremely low body weight.
When she was discharged, a new can of worms had been opened. Re-feeding at home was like hell, but something kept our family going. Our doctor in Cleveland was a blessing though, and helped us greatly.
Since D had always been slightly built, we agreed on a target weight range of 103-106 lbs. At 101, d recieved her first periods, and her heart was immaculate. However, she new that we still had to get those last two pounds on.
Today, d is in weight range, and back to full activity. She exercises daily, but for enjoyment, and eats like a horse. Her pulse stays at 60 both sitting and standing, which cracks her doctor up. D competes regularly in Irish Dance competitions, and has just completed her most successful season ever. In addition, she's running Varsity Cross Country and Track while maintaining a 4.0 GPA.
It wasn't easy getting here, and she still struggles with thoughts from time to time. Seroquel and Zoloft are still her main medications. We tried weaning d off a few times, but that lead to suicide attempts, so apparently, meds are still required.
Overall, d is happy, healthy, and drinks Boost willingly! I thought I'd never see the day- she used to throw her Boost out into the yard during refeading! I wouldn't have done this for anyone else, but d is so strong and admirable. This is a journey, and I know it's not quite complete, despite restored weight/activity/health, but this time, I think that things truley are headed in the right direction.
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Maria
Mentor
Registered: July 31, 2007
Posts: 2,613
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| | Dec 15, 2007 at 06:53 PM | Reply with quote | #33 |
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Quote: Originally Posted by tinydancer
At 5'4", she had gone from a healthy 97lbs to 86lbs withing just a month.
I wish your d total recovery but being the right weight is the most crucial aspect of recovery.
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sheepie
Registered: Nov 19, 2007
Posts: 152
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| | Dec 16, 2007 at 06:03 AM | Reply with quote | #34 |
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Hi,
Well done with the progress that you've made with your d - especially with calming the exercise bug!
I don't think your post said the age of your d, but 97 or 101lbs does seem too low for a healthy target. Both my d and I are also 5ft 4 and the healthy range (from UK government source) 116-134/140lbs (53-61/64kg). The lower max wt is for up to 25yrs, the higher for adults over this age. This correlates to a minimum BMI 19.7.
Hope this is helpful,
Sheepie
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LauraCollinsUS
Moderator
Registered: July 31, 2007
Posts: 4,036
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| | Dec 16, 2007 at 10:06 AM | Reply with quote | #35 |
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Thank you for this optimistic update.
On the target weight, I've observed a constant pattern among recovering patients: low target weights leading to constant suffering and relapse, and failure to keep increasing target weights as a child gets older.
We are all relieved when our kids' brain chemistry improves as they repair and recover healthy body composition. That relief can lead us to settle for lower target weights because we are bullied by our child's anxiety, society's medically dangerous pursuit of thinness, and poor clinical advice. We would not do this if we were talking about blood sugar or thyroid levels, but we do it with weight.
I advise all parents to get the very best clinicial advise on target weight and continuing growth targets - based on lifetime growth patterns and family background. It is really, if you think about it, a life or death decision.
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Registered: Member deleted
Posts: N/A
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| | Dec 16, 2007 at 03:41 PM | Reply with quote | #36 |
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I both appreciate and understand the various concerns of the parents. However, we are working withone of the best Eating Disorder Physicians (Dr. Ellen Rome), who is both satisfied and impressed with my daughter's state of health.
She is now 15 years old. While the targer weight is fairly "low", for her natural stature, it's qutie healthy. Throughout life, my d was always on the low end of the weight curve. Both my h and I are slight built people, as well. She eats like a horse though, is solid muscle, and all of the health signs are present, including her mental health.
However, both my h and I, along with Dr. Rome feel that she has reached an appropriate weight for the time being. Logistically, she won't be this weigtht forever. But, for now, it's qutie suitable. Even when d got periods back at 95lbs., she new that she still had to continue gaining. We weighed in yesterday (still due weekly weigh-ins, just to be safe) and she was 105lbs., and very pleased with it.
Thank you again though for the concerns. I guess that target weights are truley based upon the induvidual. Thus far, things have been stable for a year and a half, and hopefully, they will stay that way.
Best wishes
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LauraCollinsUS
Moderator
Registered: July 31, 2007
Posts: 4,036
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| | Dec 16, 2007 at 05:29 PM | Reply with quote | #37 |
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That actually sounds like what we all want: clinicians who have really worked this out with the family and used individualized measurements. Thank goodness!
The fact is, we have a really marvelous way to measure nutritional health: emotional health. When someone is engaging in their life, active, good relationships, and achieving their goals with joy, that is an indication of their overall health.
Although we've all heard people who were actively restricting/purging SAY they were happy the way they are, they weren't.
Bravo to you, to your clinicians, and to your marvelous daughter!
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demeter
Registered: Jan 19, 2008
Posts: 17
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| | Jan 19, 2008 at 03:47 PM | Reply with quote | #38 |
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I'm new to this forum-my daughter's struggled for recovery over 4 yrs(age 12-17), severe anorexia to B/P AN-we were a Maudsley family for 2+ yrs with op guidance-but that unraveled, she's good wt, but can't shake the daily purging and the new op team gave ultimatum, to send her to residential. She wants to recover, we finally have some insurance, but we're all afraid of 'sending her away'-has anyone had positive experience with this, @Rogers, or Laureate?
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Harriet
Mentor
Registered: July 31, 2007
Posts: 209
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Genna
Registered: Nov 12, 2007
Posts: 1
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| | Feb 15, 2008 at 10:02 PM | Reply with quote | #40 |
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Like Harriet, I would not recommend Rogers either.
I have heard many positive things about Laureate. Hopefully our daughter won't ever need treatment again (she has been to numerous treatment programs including Sheppard Pratt and Renfrew) but if she were to, Laureate would be one of our top choices.
The most important thing (and I cannot stress this enough) is to find a place that seems to "fit" with you, your child's and your ideas of recovery.
Some questions you may want to ask:
- What is the staff/client ratio? How many clients are there at one time?
- What types of therapy are implemented most?
- What about "real world" outings, e.g. day leave, weekend leave, etc?
- What does aftercare look like? Are there any "step down" programs?
- Is there family involvement and how much?
- What does RECOVERY look like to them? Does the center believe in complete recovery or is it more of a Twelve step approach?
- Are bathrooms locked/monitored?
- What does their "round the clock" support look like?
Then of course there are practical questions like location, costs/insurance, etc...
Even though you do now have insurance, I implore you to find out exactly what your insurance company will and won't cover. And I may be wrong about this, but my understanding is that Laureate expects an up-front payment of the proposed costs of your child's care and will then put in a claim on your behalf with your insurance company. As you can imagine, this is a substantial amount, so you may want to clarify this with their billing department.
Since her treating team feel that inpatient care is your only option, perhaps you may want to check out other boards also and ask parent's their opinion on the two programs.
Genna.
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Jackiedep
Registered: Jan 27, 2008
Posts: 33
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| | Feb 16, 2008 at 09:20 PM | Reply with quote | #41 |
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Loking back at my past posts, we started the refeeding process on January 28. That would be about 2 1/2 weeks into the process. (Wow! it seems a lot longer) So far, I would say that my d. is doing amazingly well. I have noticed that she is trying to take control over what she eats...and I have been guilty of caving in. But she is eating! I just have to make sure that she isn't too much in control...I know that she (or the ED) is testing me. I think that she has probably put on 5 pounds...although, we threw the scale out 3 weeks ago, so I really don't know for sure. I am not a big fan of our pediatrician...he has made numerous faux pas when it comes to her ED. One being, they put it on her chart that she is not supposed to be able to see her weight...yet everytime she goes to their office, they put her on the scale...and when I try to say..."turn your back", my daughter puts up a big fuss...and the dumb nurse gives her her way. So.... I am depending on a visual perception...and I would say that she is looking pretty darn good right now! Another reason I am not a big fan of the whole "team" thing is this: I went to my daughters appt. with her psychiatic nurse practioner a few days ago, and sang your praises! She sort of looked at me dumbfounded. Imagine!!!! Parents taking charge and helping their children! GAh! The Psychiatric community has not caught up with modern science regarding this disease. After I told her that I did not think my d. was capable of intense therapy at this time...she still asked me to leave the room so she could "verify" if my d. felt the same way. I tell you, some of these people are on a witch hunt. This lady still can't get it through her head that my daugher has a brain disorder...that is nobody's fault! I will keep you posted as the months go by...I feel such a kinship to all of you. Even though I am not posting...I am thinking about all of you, and I do check to see how you all are doing! I think that finding this forum has been a blessing. Anyway, thanks to all of you, for sharing your stories...and for cheering me on when I am having doubts. |
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Middleofnowwhere
Registered: Dec 31, 2007
Posts: 23
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| | Feb 17, 2008 at 07:45 AM | Reply with quote | #42 |
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Hi all,
we are a family living in Finland. Our only child 12 years old daughter is suffering from AN. I started thinking something was wrong during spring 07 and thought things could become better after summer holidays (usually four weeks in Finland) when we had possibility to spent relaxed time together.
That was not the case, when school started I discussed about our problem during a meeting with her teacher. She announced there is a three girls group who constantly skip the lunches and together harm themselves by wounding themselves in secret. There was also the school nurse attending and we got a promise our daughter (and the other two) would be weighted at school to know their state and to avoid any surprises. We gradually also started therapy 100 km away from our house where my husband and I were to tell all about our lives to one person and our daughter to another therapist. Common discussion did not take place during these conversations, we as parents were not to know anything about of our daughters problems or sorrows. During that time it also turned up that nobody was taking care of our daughters physical health even though we were promised to.
So after contacting a private doctor, our daughter was immediately hospitalized. Things went pretty fast and my h and I were not able to realize what was going on.
The hospitalization was to be a short 3 weeks period, not longer and our daughter was released after "gaining" 100 gr. Also it was "doctors order" to start immediately school and this we obeyed as humble citizens. Luckily I found this forum and ordered Laura´s and J Locks books and without knowing much we tried to start re-feeding. It was hell and our daughter promised to kill us if she ever could, but we were much calmer as we had already visited this forum and had so much insight information on what words and tactics ED could use. But what scared me, was my daughter saying it feels awful if I hugged her.
We spent hours sitting at dinner table and at the end our daughter ate. But that was too little as it turned out she did not eat at school in spite her teacher did sit with her and insisted gently her to eat. Her weight did drop. She is 145 cm tall and weighted 26 kg and we were told to go to another hospital. Also her heart rate was 29 during night and 59 during day. So she was in life danger. In hospital they started 500 kcal diet and her weight did drop again, of course. They put a nasal tube for her because of this and regardless of the fact she did eat. It was horrible. Now she is on 1800 kcal which I was reluctantly told after I made inquiries on that. I was told the calories are not that important. According to the nutritionist the most important thing is her mental state. Now she has been in hospital for five weeks. The tube was taken away as it was not needed and if it was needed it would not have worked anyway as it was stuck ed. I am worried they started with and still are using too "modest" feeding. We have been thinking of all possible ways we could to save her. Selling our house going abroad etc. and we still think of everything. And we are worried time is running out. Last week I sent a letter to Lucille Packard´s hospital in Palo Alto and we are awaiting for their answer. We have been trying to discuss about the necessity of feeding with professionals, and the possibility to weight her blind and not to discuss about food when our daughter is present, but we get only very little response on our suggestions. Also we are afraid to take her away from the hospital (we are not even sure this is possible without layers) if we would risk her life. I am sorry this is so long and badly organized a letter, but I felt I have to let you all know. Also I would like to thank this forum and all amazing parents who do anything to save their child(ren). |
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LauraCollinsUS
Moderator
Registered: July 31, 2007
Posts: 4,036
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Middleofnowwhere
Registered: Dec 31, 2007
Posts: 23
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| | Feb 17, 2008 at 08:03 AM | Reply with quote | #44 |
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Thanks Laura, we visited their website, but as we could read and understand, it is important that the patient is willing to recover. That is not true in our case, daughter very seldom even admits she has a problem. She is only afraid to gain weight etc. So this is why we felt mandometer is not our solution. But yes perhaps we should give another thought for that.
warm regards Middle
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LauraCollinsUS
Moderator
Registered: July 31, 2007
Posts: 4,036
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| | Feb 17, 2008 at 08:25 AM | Reply with quote | #45 |
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Wanting to recover is usually a goal, but usually not expected in the early stages.
They are so close to you, and though controversial, take a very medical view of the illness. You are at a stage where medical stabilization is key.
Don't despair - you WILL find an option that will work for your family. Your real daughter is still in there and can recover - and she does, at some level, very much want to recover even if she can't say it.
You are good parents, and you will find a way!!
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Shawn
Mentor
Registered: Aug 04, 2007
Posts: 403
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| | Feb 17, 2008 at 08:31 AM | Reply with quote | #46 |
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"We spent hours sitting at dinner table and at the end our daughter ate. But that was too little as it turned out she did not eat at school "
Dear Middle of Nowhere,
This part of your e-mail stands out for me. You have hope. You have power. If you are willing to barter your home and send your daughter overseas to Stanford for treatment you also have incredible determination and love to do whatever it takes to get your daughter healthy again!
Though I don't think it should have to come to that. Because as you write you already found that "at the end" your daughter ate. When you sat with her at the table at home and insisted.
You used the word "humble" to describe yourself, and I know you did that with some sarcasm. I understand why---that is how the doctors make us feel. But out of all the experts YOU so far have helped your daughter the most. Follow your instincts. Keep her home from school if she doesn't eat there. Tell your doctor that in your humble opinion it is time to refeed your daughter and get her better.
I just read Laura's excellent suggestion of the Mandometer clinic---that seems like a very hopeful possibility. I can't believe by the way that someone as young and ill as your daughter would ever be in a state to WANT to get better...you have to insist on it.
It wasn't clear to me just how ill your daughter is now. (weight and height?) Perhaps she is so physically compromised she does need hospitalization, but if not, I think you can do this at home, yourselves. Have you read the Maudsley parents website? There are stories there of several families who did it on their own, without a lot of support. Just be sure your daughter's physical health is stable---many famlies on this forum take their children to their pediatrician's for a weight check and tests every week, but otherwise beat the anorexia themselves---over the dinner table.
As for the hugs, I remember another parent posting something similar about a year ago. As I recall, her daughter now welcomes hugs again and is doing much better.
There is hope.
Shawn |
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Middleofnowwhere
Registered: Dec 31, 2007
Posts: 23
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| | Feb 18, 2008 at 03:39 AM | Reply with quote | #47 |
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Dear Laura and Shawn I cannot express how thank full I am. If I only had words, but I have tears in my eyes. We will contact mandometer. Thank you. with blessings Middle |
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Linda
Mentor
Registered: Oct 03, 2007
Posts: 328
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| | Feb 18, 2008 at 07:41 AM | Reply with quote | #48 |
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Dear Middle of no where
Just some info on Mando in Sweden. I took my d at 19 years there from Australia. She most certainly was not cooperative. She had given up eating and had decided life really wasn't worth it when we got on a plane with 24 hours notice. Nowhere here would admit her. There were others there of varying ages and severity - a couple were being nasogastric fed. They have a separate program for the under 16 years. We stayed there three months before bringing the computer back to Aus. My s did the program as an out patient in Melbourne.
Without that computer I wouldn't have got either my young adult s or d to eat. However, although the mandometer used at meals was defiantly a life saver - as they became more comfortable eating we incorporated as much of and learnt from the Maudsley approach as possible. The support from this site has also been a godsend.
If you'd like any specific information please don't hesitate to email me. Best wishes
Linda
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annieb
Registered: Feb 27, 2008
Posts: 49
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| | March 03, 2008 at 07:54 PM | Reply with quote | #49 |
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I am so happy to report that I am seeing a glimmer of hope. Thanks to all I have read here, things are looking up.....today, anyway.
My d has complained of severe cold intolerance and has basically been miserable due to the ed-insomnia, constipation MOOD SWINGS obsessing over school, work-outs etc. etc. At least she has recognized the misery she has been in.
This week-end we had talks that lasted hours. She asked me to take pics of her in her favorite swimsuit.................she was devastated and admitted that was not the way she wants to look. We then reviewed how she physically felt and through many tears, she thanked me for helping her and asked what we needed to do. We then went to her bf's baseball game where, at least 4 people commented on her weight-or lack of it. We are in the south with temps in the 80's. She could not longer hide under sweatshirts. So, I explained, the only way to eliminate all the negative feelings,physical and mental, was first to eat....and eat she has. She still would talk about "healthy" low cal food which I explained helped to get her in the shape she's in now.
Anyway, she has been told and has totally complied that she has to come home every single day from college, no working out is allowed. So far, so good. She even, on her own made an appt. with the university nutrition counselor for this week.
There's still tears and anxiety and I guess I talk with her no less than 20x/day but she found out how committed we are to this.
I think to our advantage, she is 20 1/2 years old.....definitely able to understand basic physiology.
The best thing we ever did was to be firm and appear confident. She knows I will pull her out of school-even with only a few weeks left.
I did put her on Life Ext mix...the best vitamin supplement ever as well as probiotics and digestive food enzymes.
We are ALL exhausted. But it is so worth it.nothing matters more.
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Chocolate
Mentor
Registered: Sept 02, 2007
Posts: 370
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| | March 03, 2008 at 08:56 PM | Reply with quote | #50 |
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What a lovely post! I know you d. will be fine with a mother as caring as you. |
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