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mjkz

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Reply with quote  #26 
Different meals for different twins like Foodsupport_Aus has suggested.  That way there is no comparing and no eating just as much or as little as the other twin.  If you have to do the same meal, I'd feed them at staggered times in different rooms too so that they can't compare and make sure they are eating the same amount.  As for fear foods, etc., you know your daughters the best.  With my daughter, I just started Magic Plate and she got everything all at once.  Others here have taken a more gradual approach of making a list of fear foods and challenging one at a time and repeating that fear food until it is no longer one. 
annabanana

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Reply with quote  #27 
Thank you all for sharing.  Sorry I've not been able to get a decent internet for the past few days to reply.

I will see how I can implement your suggestions to try and see if they will help the girls.  

re: refeeding--I am wondering when do you know to 'normalize' the amount of calories?  Both twins' weight has been restored for over a month (2+ months for twin2) and now they carry a little pouch from eating more than they used to before.  They are crying about it at times, but I figured this is normal. Do I keep increasing their caloric intake even at this point?  And for how long if I need to?  What are some things I need to keep in mind?  
Torie

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Reply with quote  #28 
Quote:
Originally Posted by annabanana
Both twins' weight has been restored for over a month (2+ months for twin2) and now they carry a little pouch from eating more than they used to before.  They are crying about it at times, but I figured this is normal.  


Yep. Normal. Unfortunately, the weight first goes to the belly and the face ... after a while it does redistribute. xx

-Torie

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"We are angels of hope, of healing, and of light. Darkness flees from us." -YP 
Foodsupport_AUS

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Reply with quote  #29 
Annabanana since you mentioned before that you have not yet received treatment, are you sure that your D's are weight restored? It is common as Torie has said for kids to get some bulges initially, including before they get to full weight restoration.  Stopping to soon with weight gain can be an issue. Many of us have felt that worry as we have watched our children gain weight. It is hard to put on too much. Increased calories are generally required for at least six months after weight restoration, and for some longer than that. 
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D diagnosed restrictive AN June 2010 age 13.5. Weight restored July 2012. Relapse and now clawing our way back. Treatment: multiple hospitalisations and individual and family therapy.
toothfairy

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Reply with quote  #30 
Hi Annabanana,
Here is my experience for what its worth.

My S was brought to a bmi of 19 and considered weight restored with the help of  "a professional ED specialist dietitian".

He was put on a maintainance plan. I was not happy about this, I knew he wasn't weight restored, but went along with the " professional".   

He was doing ok on this, but just ok. He could function quite well and was able to be "compliant", but that was all. I knew he was still really suffering, and had constant AN thoughts.

I knew from reading on this site that this is a VERY common problem, that the target weights are so often set way to low, and the sufferer looks ok, but can be still very ill and entrenched. 

Then he took a huge growth spurt in November 2016 and although he was stable in weight, his bmi went down to 18.7.  He still had lots of " AN behaviours"  ( like pinching the fat ??? on his arms , constant butt clenches, taking hundreds and hundreds of selfies etc etc)but could function otherwise really well.
At bmi 18.7 I discovered He started dumping his lunches at school again, and I decided to take control immediately, and take matter into my own hands.
This was in NO  way weight restored for him.

Since I took control of his plan, he has consistently gained since early December. I added ( still do) A LOT !!! of HWC and butter to his meals and also increased the meal and desert portion sizes buy a lot,  and I kid you not. He has been getting better by the day.

My kid needs a HUGE amount of food, and it is going to be that way for a long time. My guess is that my S eats approx 3500 calories a day.
He is still growing and of course still recovering. He will be growing until his early 20's so I know how important it is not to have my kid on a " maintainance plan," his weight needs to be going up for at least the next  5 years as he grows up and broadens out.
I haven't weighed him since November, but I guess his bmi would be approx 22 now, it still needs to go higher.I know this.

Every day I am noticing the rigid behaviours drop.It is like a miracle.

I dont have to ask him to come for breakfast etc, he bounces out of bed, grabs a huge bowl of cereal, gets his toast, tells me what he would like in his school sandwich, picks the higher cal sides to go with his school lunch.
He will go out with his friends, grab a hamburger and fries with them for tea.Then a huge ferrero Rocher ice cream desert with no qualms.
He will grab a hot dog or a few slices of pizza at a scout event. He will go to his pals house and eat what he is given, and will come home and tell me there was no desert and he did not want to ask so he needs one. 

He will tell me if he missed a snack while out. He has not done any butt clenches, etc since end of December, he is bright as a button, delighted with life.
It has taken a year and a half  ( IP from October 2015 until Feb 2016) to get to where we are now , after he was told he was " W/R in February 2016. 

I am working on the last bits of eradicating ED,  and the answer is food food and more food.

This illness is counter intuitive. The more weight that goes on, the thoughts  dissipate. For example , often the sufferer feels huge at a low bmi, but feels great a higher one.
Thats my experience so far.
Best wishes to you and your girls.
TF

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Son,DX with AN, (purging type) age 13 in October 2015 ,  (4 months immediate inpatient) ,  Now Phase  2 , making progress every day. Living life to the full like a normal teen. We are not out of the woods yet, but we can see the light at the end of the tunnel, thanks to ATDT.
Torie

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Reply with quote  #31 
I'm another member of the club whose kid's doc told her her weight was fine when actually she still needed to gain a fair bit more weight.  My d was not fine at that weight and - more importantly - her mental state was not improving.

There is really no way to know how much weight is enough for any given person, other than being at that weight for a while and seeing if ED symptoms fade.   It's the weirdest thing - they hate hate hate their weight/size/shape when they are underweight and then they are much more comfortable with themselves once they have gained more.  We see that same pattern over and over here ... and, again, my family is among those who have personally experienced this.

My d is doing really well now.  The reason I keep hanging around here on the forum is to pass forward the good advice that I received here myself.  One thing that really struck me is this:  If your ED-kid is at a perfectly fine weight, her weight will also be perfectly fine at that same weight plus another 5 pounds.  But if her weight is currently a little too low, that next 5 pounds can make all the difference. 

So if you aren't seeing improvements in mental state, I would urge you to keep them gaining.  xx

-Torie

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"We are angels of hope, of healing, and of light. Darkness flees from us." -YP 
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