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ed_newbie

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Reply with quote  #101 
[love] I love to hear this update deenl.  Great job!
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"Lineage, personality and environment may shape you, but they do not define your full potential."    Mollie Marti  

ed_newbie

14 yr old d diagnosed with AN late December 2015 at the age of 12 after a 23 lb weight loss during prior 3 months. Started FBT/Maudsley at home on Christmas Eve with support from amazing local nutritionist specializing in ED and trained in FBT. WR Feb 2016 and now chasing growth and taking one meal at a time.
mjkz

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Reply with quote  #102 
AWESOME!!![thumb][wave]
Kali

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Reply with quote  #103 
Hi Deenl

So happy to hear that your son has made progress and is able to be more flexible about snacks, has gained weight and is going to try to go back to school again!

Warmly,

Kali



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deenl

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Reply with quote  #104 
Hi all,

This thread has ended up being a bit of a diary for me so I will keep posting just so I don't forget how far we've come.

Well, he is hovering in or around WR. I would love to get a bit of a cushion but can't manage it. But I am happy enough that he is keeping pace with his growth. I will always keep pushing and eventually we will get there.

But the BIG NEWS is that he is going back to school. Just a couple of hours 3 days a week but he is in a great mood on the days he goes. He sits beside me in the car, chatting away. Normally he sits in the back glowering.

I drop him in in the afternoon as mornings meals are always the hardest and he comes home on the train with his brother. Mostly I don't give it a thought but it does flash across my mind that this was his chosen method of suicide and in the bad times we had one afternoon of scouring the tracks when he went missing. It crosses my mind but I have no fear. He is good.

There have been a few vital people on our journey; our pediatrician and you guys. But now I can add his mentor. He just gets my S. His mentor has always been fond of him and finds him interesting and his quirks a stimulating challenge. This guy just intuitively knows what to say and do. There are few people I can happily trust with S but with him I can. We also got very lucky with the school attendance inspector. When contacted he was totally aware of our situation, took a hands off approach and just said keep him up to date. Whatever you call the good energy in this world it sure looks out for us at times.

By the looks of it S is starting puberty. His skin is getting a few pimples. Also cool.

Not so cool is that he still only eats at home. I am constantly trying to vary his diet and occasionally he will eat in a different room. Will keep pushing the boundaries there. But that seems to be the way for us. Just miniscule steps forward that eventually add up. Except of course for the month in hospital where we got his basic routine set up. That had to be a big step cause otherwise he would have died. But since then we can poke the beast but not hit it. The ED has of course exaggerated S's own strong sense of self determination and stubbornness. But he didn't lick that off the ground and I'm stronger and wiser and bigger and even more stubborn. Where there's a will, there's a way!

To all those who have supported us, as always, my eternal thanks. To those still in the horrors, stay strong.

Warm wishes,
D

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Mother of 13yo son restricting but no body image issues; inpatient 6 wks Sept/Oct 2015 but lost weight! So emotionally destroyed they agreed to let him home to us. Stable but no progress. Medical hosp to kick start recovery for Feb 2016. Slowly and cautiously gaining weight at home and seeing signs of our real kid. Hovering around WR. Mood great, mostly. Building up hour by hour at school after 18 months at home. 

Swedish proverb: Love me when I least deserve it because that's when I need it most.

We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence Recovery, then, is not an act but a habit. Aristotle.

If the plan doesn't work, change the plan but never the goal. (but don't give up on the plan too soon, maybe it just needs a tweak or a bit more time and determination [wink] )

toothfairy

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Reply with quote  #105 
Hi Deenl,
I am so happy for you, I have done a big happy dance here for you.
Wow -against all odds, look how far you have come!
I can just picture you in the car,fabulous !!!!!
Deenl, in time he will want to have a freind in or go out & have food...Hopefully being in school will bring him on in that regard...along with the usual food more food & time...
You sure have done your duty deenl,you are an amazing Mum,
Keep us updated,
Xxxxxxxxx

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Son,DX with AN, (purging type) age 13 in October 2015 ,  (4 months immediate inpatient) , Then FBT at home since.and making progress every day. He is now in good recovery, and Living life to the full like a normal teen. We are not completely out of the woods yet, but we can see the light at the end of the tunnel, thanks to ATDT. Hoping to get him into full recovery and remission one day at a time.
Francie

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Reply with quote  #106 
Hi Deenl,
What wonderful news for your S and you and your family. It is great to hear of your son's progress. Thank you for telling your story. I have often thought of your situation when I have been feeling low about our d's situation. I'm so glad things are on the upswing for you and your dear son. You are an inspiration as you've spelled out a very different way of getting your child to health. You've shown us that it can be scary, that it can take a long time, that you have to be brave and creative, and that you have to keep your eye on the prize. It is encouraging and hopeful to have your example and know of your situation. Thank you, and all best wishes, XO.

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Francie

bryony_1234

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Reply with quote  #107 
Great stories here. Best wishes.
deenl

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Reply with quote  #108 
Thanks for all the kind comments.

I just want to be clear for anyone who has not been following our story from the beginning that I was and still am 100% focused on getting my son fully weight restored and increasing his weight to allow him to catch up on his stunted growth.

I used the methods that worked best for us but had they not worked I would have done ANYTHING to support his FULL recovery. I fought, first for his life, then for a life worth living and now I fight for a life completely free from any trace of the ED. I will not cease until I have achieved that goal.

Keep fighting folks. I know you are all doing the best you can with all the variables of your particular situation.

With warm wishes as always,
D

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Mother of 13yo son restricting but no body image issues; inpatient 6 wks Sept/Oct 2015 but lost weight! So emotionally destroyed they agreed to let him home to us. Stable but no progress. Medical hosp to kick start recovery for Feb 2016. Slowly and cautiously gaining weight at home and seeing signs of our real kid. Hovering around WR. Mood great, mostly. Building up hour by hour at school after 18 months at home. 

Swedish proverb: Love me when I least deserve it because that's when I need it most.

We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence Recovery, then, is not an act but a habit. Aristotle.

If the plan doesn't work, change the plan but never the goal. (but don't give up on the plan too soon, maybe it just needs a tweak or a bit more time and determination [wink] )

sk8r31

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Reply with quote  #109 
It truly is wonderful to see how far your s and family have come!  It is the journey that no family wants to take, and one I would never wish for anyone.  And yet...there is a silver lining for many of us.  Stronger parents...able to advocate for their kids.... and often stronger bonds between parents & kids once the illness is kicked to the curb.

It was my greatest fear that we would lose our beloved d to this illness.  I was willing to tolerate her hatred of me for the rest of her life if she could recover from ED.  I heard over and over again in the early days how I was making her life miserable and was called awful names for insisting on full nutritional rehabilitation.

And now...a close, loving relationship once more....stronger than before ED.

Really cheering for you & family deenl, as you continue to move your s forward to full recovery.  You are a hero parent, who is inspiring others.

Warmly,
sk8r31

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It is good to not only hope to be successful, but to expect it and accept it--Maya Angelou
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