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atdt31_US

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Reply with quote  #1 
Hi All -- not sure we even have a provider locally who would have the experience needed, but can someone tell me what family therapy looks like?  And, I guess, if I am correct that family therapy is, ideally, part of FBT.

While there is no doubt our little family of four (h,w,d,d) has issues that do not generate from the one d's eating issues, that would certainly be the catalyst to get us to Family Therapy (if I understand it right).  Stress in the house about what to serve, how well or quickly it is eaten, role of h, w, and sister, brainstorming ways/methods of restoring/preserving peace and normalcy in light of years of this dysfunction that has no end in sight.  Some version of that is what I envision Family Therapy would entail -- 

a. am I correct that is what it would look like?  would it be a part of addressing non-eater-d's anxiety?

b. If yes to a, it seems like non-eater-d would feel very ganged up on and blameworthy, which would not be accurate and would be very hurtful.

Any insight into this would be helpful as we continue to try to navigate giving the girls a normal childhood and happy home despite the daily drama over amount of intake/speed of intake/need to ingest certain medications, anxiety, etc.  

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Mom of either pre-diagnosis or non-ed underweight 12 yoa (as of March 2018) kid here to learn how to achieve weight gain.  BMI steadily in the mid 12's for nearly her entire life.  Born 2006. UPDATE:  April 2018 diagnosed ARFID, I believe, based solely on weight being less than 75% of Ideal Body Weight (not sure if he also considered low bone density to be a significant nutritional deficiency - not positive he knew her bmd).
Torie

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Reply with quote  #2 
I hate to be the Voice of Doom, but in my small experience, Family Therapy tends to be old-school talk therapy that blames the mom / mum for all problems and colludes with ED by telling everyone that we need to stop being the Food Police.  So, I would encourage you to choose carefully and ask lots of questions before allowing your d to participate in something like this.

Hopefully there are some good and enlightening ones out there somewhere.  xx

-Torie

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"We are angels of hope, of healing, and of light. Darkness flees from us." -YP 
tina72

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Reply with quote  #3 
Hi,
here in Europe Family Therapy is something totally different to FBT so I cannot give you a really good advice on that.
Family Therapy is here what Torie said: Old fashioned seeking for causes and blaming parents. Telling you your kid needs more freedom and that you are overprotecting, not to be the food police etc.

FBT therapists do something else in phase 3: you talk about what problems every family member has left, what you need to get into normal life again. How you can cope with all the things that are still there after surviving ED. What you as a sufferer can do to avoid relapses and how your family can help you with that. What triggers ED and how you can avoid these triggers. Something like that.
The big question is what you want to achieve with that. If you need some help to get into a normal life again, seek for a FBT therapist or come here [biggrin].
Anyway, talk to a candidate before and alone and ask how much he knows about ED. Be careful.
Tina72
EC_Mom

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Reply with quote  #4 
I think you are referring to family therapy as a way to help the family reduce and manage all the tension "around" the ED, not to treat the ED, right?

But still, I wouldn't do this. WAY too much opportunity for a non-ED specialist to talk about food-related stress in ways that would undermine you, the parents.

If non-ED-d has stress, maybe she can get her own therapist. We did this for our non-ed kid, just so he could have a place for dealing with his stuff. And likewise parents could have a marital therapist, to talk about how to maintain the relationship as well as possible during this awful time. 

But I would not expose an ED kid to any therapist who is not FBT or some other approach to ED I approve of.
atdt31_US

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Reply with quote  #5 
hmmm. I see what you are all saying and it is in keeping with my concerns.  So ... what is the family therapy at the UCSD 1 week intensive program -- it is involving the family and ed kid in dealing with the eating issues (well before phase 3 of FBT?), I thought,  and finding ways for the parents and siblings to also be heard/guided in going forward in a way to help the household as well as the kid with the eating issues.  I feel like I am blurring some things together I guess.
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Mom of either pre-diagnosis or non-ed underweight 12 yoa (as of March 2018) kid here to learn how to achieve weight gain.  BMI steadily in the mid 12's for nearly her entire life.  Born 2006. UPDATE:  April 2018 diagnosed ARFID, I believe, based solely on weight being less than 75% of Ideal Body Weight (not sure if he also considered low bone density to be a significant nutritional deficiency - not positive he knew her bmd).
atdt31_US

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Reply with quote  #6 
Quote:
Originally Posted by EC_Mom
I think you are referring to family therapy as a way to help the family reduce and manage all the tension "around" the ED, not to treat the ED, right?
.


Maybe.  I thought they would go together I guess, but one goal is certainly to reduce the stress in the household for all four of us, that comes from the daily eating issues as well as anxiety and daily resistance to taking the required constipation medication.  
 

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Mom of either pre-diagnosis or non-ed underweight 12 yoa (as of March 2018) kid here to learn how to achieve weight gain.  BMI steadily in the mid 12's for nearly her entire life.  Born 2006. UPDATE:  April 2018 diagnosed ARFID, I believe, based solely on weight being less than 75% of Ideal Body Weight (not sure if he also considered low bone density to be a significant nutritional deficiency - not positive he knew her bmd).
mjkz

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Reply with quote  #7 
I guess we've been very lucky because I've done family therapy on just those kinds of issues with my daughter and it has been very effective.  We actually saw my daughter's therapist who specializes in trauma and has a very solid background in eating issues too although she did get more training on that when she accepted my daughter as a patient.

I would look for someone who knows how to treat EDs and trauma both and make the goals going into therapy very clear.  I made it very clear going in that we were not there to deal with what started my daughter's ED or even to uncover those but to deal with issues arising from treatment of the ED, ways that we could help reduce the emotional tone of meals and deal with communication issues, etc.  Our therapist is very skill oriented, does DBT and CBT as well as treating PTSD, trauma issues (which every single family who has ever had a kid with an ED has if not going in then stemming from treatment).  We did very short courses and then went out and put the skills learned to the test.  We then met back to discuss what worked, what didn't work, etc.  She has been a true livesaver!!
atdt31_US

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Reply with quote  #8 
Yes, you are correct, I should add PTSD to the litany of things that we would like a magic want to address ... except that the Post part is wishful thinking - still very much in the traumatic stress part.  I live in a metro area and there is literally NO therapist that claims to be FBT in my city.  There is ONE about an hour away (and I am still waiting for the call back from her from about three months ago when we had a lengthy conversation and she was going to look into something and get back to me).  But since we are in all likelihood not RAN, but possibly ARFID, I was wondering if a normal "family therapist" would suffice -- looks like that answer is "probably not" and/or "only if you find a really good one who will get educated on Eds."   
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Mom of either pre-diagnosis or non-ed underweight 12 yoa (as of March 2018) kid here to learn how to achieve weight gain.  BMI steadily in the mid 12's for nearly her entire life.  Born 2006. UPDATE:  April 2018 diagnosed ARFID, I believe, based solely on weight being less than 75% of Ideal Body Weight (not sure if he also considered low bone density to be a significant nutritional deficiency - not positive he knew her bmd).
runmum

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Reply with quote  #9 
For those in the UK reading this, I would say ours was not old fashioned or blaming parents. I didn't find it a lot of help as I had read such a lot, but I imagine some families may find it more useful.
Tali97

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Reply with quote  #10 
We found our therapist by identifying what we wanted from a therapist and asking therapists for recommendations of people in the business that they thought would be able to help. It took a few phone calls, but we ended up with a therapist who has worked wonders but was not someone I would have gone to without the recommendations that we received. I will also say that around here that the therapist you want is the one with the long waiting list.
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18 year old boy (Gluten Free/Dairy Free 2005)
 IP - March/April 2014.  ARFID.
 2015 - Gastroparisis
AUSSIEedfamily

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Reply with quote  #11 
Dear atdt31_US,

I believe the 5 day UCSD program you are discussing is the NEW FED TR program that is a collaboration between UCSD and the Centre For Balance Living.

Read the attached research report on the NEW FED TR program program.

Eating Disorders Families Australia (www.edfa.org.au) is working and planning on getting Dr Laura Hill & Stephanie Knazt Peck to Australia and possibly New Zealand in the southern hemisphere spring of 2018

This program is explained in one of Laura Collins Lyster Mench's New Plates Podcast.

http://www.circummensam.com/new-plates-podcast.html

http://www.circummensam.com/episode-4-new-fed-tr-at-ucsd-and-cbl.html

Episode 4 - Treat To The Trait: a NEW approach to adult eating disorder treatment


 
Attached Files
pdf Outcome data NEW FED TR Oct 28 2016-1.pdf (285.11 KB, 8 views)


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harri

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Reply with quote  #12 
Hi all,

We are UK based and our daughter has been in hospital for six weeks now. I cannot compare family therapy to other countries, but for us it has been a life saviour and I call it personally a "sanity hour" of the week. No shaming or blaming at all, although our therapist can be pretty strict, too. But it was her who got our daughter back to normal eating. After a "lecture" what NG tubes etc. will cause, our daughter went to see her dietitian herself and asked to get back to full meals and we haven't had a problem ever since.

Based on group sessions with other parents, it looks like family therapy works very well for some families and not so well for others. I would advise to get some recommendations before starting with anyone.
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